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In-laws are a very special relationship. They are obviously not related by blood, but they are the most familiar strangers.
Two strange families came together because of a pair of people who loved each other and became the closest relatives. It's just that the people in this kind of relationship are relatively strangers and don't understand each other well, so how to deal with the relationship between in-laws has become a headache for many people.
In fact, people get along with each other the same way. If you don’t want to make enemies between relatives, then it’s best not to do these three things. This is the most basic human wisdom.
1: Don’t compare.
Although the in-laws are relatives, they come from families in two camps. Therefore, when the in-laws get along with each other, they often fall into a kind of comparison. The younger couple is closer to which party. In this kind of in-laws, comparison Which party in the relationship has more say.
In fact, although this kind of comparison is human nature, it is meaningless, because in the end it is the couple who live together. Among the in-laws, who speaks more authoritatively and who has gained the trust of the couple more, in fact, for them There is no real meaning to life.
Moreover, in such a comparison, only the couple will be affected in the end. They need to balance the relationship with both parties, always grasp the appropriateness, pay attention to a bowl of water, and carefully maintain the delicate balance between both parties.
The palms and backs of the hands are full of flesh. For the young couple, both sides are their closest relatives, so there is no need to let the young couple fall into this heavy balance for the sake of so-called face.
After all, children are the people they love most. Giving up some so-called face to make children's lives easier is a sign of parents' love for their children.
2: Don’t interfere in the family affairs of young couples
Parents’ concern for their children is endless. If you raise a child for 100 years, you will worry for 99 years. Even if the children have formed their own family, in the hearts of their parents, they are still the same. A baby who needs to be cared for.
Just this kind of care may change the taste in the eyes of relatives.
If you pay too much attention to the lives of the couple, or even interfere in their family affairs and guide their lives, then in the eyes of the other spouse's in-laws, you may be a very controlling person who wants to control their lives. Take control of your voice.
No one wants their children to live under the control of others, even in-laws.
Intervening in the life of a couple will, on the one hand, bring burdens to one's own life, and on the other hand, it will also inadvertently plant the seeds of conflict, especially once they cause some bad consequences because of your intervention, then this One can imagine the complaints.
Let go when it's time to let go. Children already have their own lives, so how they live their lives is what they are responsible for. Even if they make some mistakes, they are experiences on their way to growth.
Giving children more space in their lives is also the secret to maintaining a good relationship between in-laws and families.
Three: Don’t be too close to your in-laws
Sometimes we always leave our worst temper and character to the people closest to us. This is how people get along with each other. Once the relationship becomes close, there will be less of it. Due to some scruples, sometimes we do things that are out of proportion.
There is really no need to be too close to the in-laws. After all, both parties started their lives as strangers. Even if you become in-laws, you are still the stranger you are most familiar with, and your point of contact is only with your children.
As long as you have a good relationship with your children, their happy lives will be enough for your in-laws. As for whether the relationship between in-laws should be like real relatives, that is a matter of opinion.
Relationships also take time to settle. Sometimes we are forced to maintain close contact. The more we interact with each other, the more conflicts will arise. It is better to keep it within a polite range, and both parties will have some understanding and restraint. , so the conflicts caused will be much less.
Getting married with the in-laws is not the ultimate goal. It is what both parents want for the children to live freely and happily. So don’t do things at the expense of others. Focus on the children. Letting them live a good life is everyone’s common wish.
The in-laws are brought together because of the children. As long as the children live a happy life, that is the greatest happiness for both parents. In the process of getting along, be more understanding and tolerant, be more empathetic, and don't have too many demands. In this way, the relationship between the two parties will naturally be harmonious. As long as there is love in your heart, there will be no in-laws who can't get along well.
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