A philosopher once said: "When we love others, we also hope that others love us."
Therefore, mutual understanding and respect are not only between people. The basic principle of getting along is the basic way of getting along between relatives.
Even with the family as a unit, the most basic empathy ability cannot be lost anytime and anywhere! Knowing how to take care of each other's emotions, being able to tolerate each other and thinking about problems from each other's standpoint, can the relationship be harmonious and harmonious for a long time.
If you forget these minimum communication rules, you are too embarrassed to trouble the other party, and use it as your own right to take advantage of it, and you may not even be able to do so in the end.
Among the next family members, this kind of reasoning is very representative.
After listening to the complaints of the parties, I believe everyone will agree to this point.
01
Hello everyone, my surname is Zheng, I am 33 years old this year. My husband and I have been married for 8 years and have a son and a daughter, the elder is 6 years old and the younger is 4 years old.
There is a younger brother under my husband, who is 4 years younger. I was 29 this year. I have been married for more than two years and gave birth to a son more than a year ago. Now he is just over 1 year old. Speaking of my brother-in-law, I really have something to say.
is really a perfect match in general! I don't do anything at home all day long, throw at our house if I don't want to take the children, and then ran out to eat and drink by myself, and don't care about the rest.
If they have something to deal with outside, they really can’t get out of their bodies. As a brother-in-law, it’s understandable to help with the children.
But every time two people are addicted to drinking and having fun together, they don't drink or go crazy until nine in the evening, and they can't even remember to call back at ten o'clock.
There are many situations like this. We feel that as a family, the identity of the family is a little higher than them. For their good, we also feel that children are pitiful and have such irresponsible parents. Sometimes we want to persuade them. I want them to converge a bit.
But the other party’s reaction is really chilling.I don’t know what my husband thinks, but I’m really not too comfortable.
02
I remember that once my husband said a few words about his brother, my uncle’s face collapsed immediately, and the corners of his eyes were too lazy to glance at me and stared at him.
He doesn't have to explain the meaning and I understand it. It's probably just complaining that his brother even cares about such small things, are you embarrassed? It's almost like this.
His wife, that is, our younger siblings, is not happy anymore. She doesn’t dare to behave towards her uncle (that is, my husband), so she muttered to me: "Anyway, your two children go to school and get into I’m in kindergarten, and now I don’t have any kids around to take at home, and I don’t have much to do. Why don’t you take it for us?" After seeing this situation and listening to this kind of words, who will not take it to heart? It is natural to treat others as babysitters for them, and forget it without a word of thanks. Who is the embarrassed person to say that?
At that time, I responded to her and said: "Sorry, this is not my task. We are not related by blood." The other party was also annoyed. People later said that I was outrageous, miserable, stingy, terrible... …
03
Later, I simply didn't show it. Who made them love it? As long as we call and talk about this, we will say that we are going out and we are not free.
If you don't call, I will stay at home without speaking or opening the door. As long as they beat it, I will be hard-hearted, and there is no "compassion" at all.
We are not the nanny they hired, nor do we owe each other by nature. My own children don't care, and they point to others in everything. I think such parents have to retrain and learn.
Originally I thought they would feud us over this matter, but what I didn’t expect is that when we always agreed and responded to each other’s wishes, they felt that everything was a matter of course.The more troublesome the better.
When we started to reject their presumptuousness, the other party started to be polite to you.
Afterwards, if you really encounter any difficulties and problems and need our help, then you will finally have a sense of gratitude, appreciation and feedback.
After this incident, I think, relatives are relatives. During the holidays, there is a sense of etiquette, just drop by each other.
Don’t get too close, do too much trouble, ask for trouble, spend money and effort to incur unnecessary burdens, but you can’t please, and it’s easy to inexplicably hurt your peace!
Conclusion:
Even between family members and relatives, keeping distance is a kind of respect for each other; keeping distance is also a kind of love for each other. The right distance can produce beauty and keep the space that makes each other feel comfortable.
The relationship between relatives, not far or near is the most appropriate. The best kind of relationship between the two is that they are not overly enthusiastic and are polite in dealing with them.
Don’t pay too much attention to and rely on each other, so I can focus more on taking care of my own life. This way of getting along is normal, and you will always know how to get along with each other.
will not confuse the relationship between each other because of being too close, and give birth to some untimely greed and misunderstandings.
The main reason for getting along with relatives is to pursue a feeling of ease, no burden, and comfort.
Why do we have to break this harmony and balance? Therefore, if the other party does not know how to measure, then the other party must also use indifference and refusal to let them understand what kind of relationship is between them.
Help them regain their sense of proportion, so that they can free themselves from a completely unreasonable and unnecessary bondage and kidnapping.
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