"I'm unhappy, irritable, I can only feel a little more comfortable when cutting my wrists." "My father has a bad temper. When he loses his temper, I want to hide or escape, but when I'm quarantined at home due to the epidemic, I can't do anything about it." "My mother hit me with a stick and kicked my stomach with her feet." "I always feel that someone is monitoring me, and I hear a voice telling me to die"... "When did I start to think of suicide?" the doctor asked. "A long time ago, it was particularly strong last week. Grandma's house is on the 7th floor, and I lay on the balcony and saw where I jumped down." "I really can't survive anymore." "I just want to die"... Is this a "farewell" for the suicide? No, this is their "call for help".
Director Wang Xiaoli of the Department of Medical Psychology, Guangdong Corps Hospital of the Armed Police Force, said: At present, many parents are asking what's wrong with their children now? They always say "death", "living enough", "don't want to go to school anymore", "don't force me..." Many parents come to the psychological counseling room of the hospital to do parent work and often ask the counselors, "Is there a problem in society, or is there a problem in our parents?" With the development of society and the occurrence of related disasters such as the epidemic in recent years, it has also prompted the depressive tendency of young people at home and abroad to gradually attract the attention of the society. The trend of young people in recent years has been particularly prominent in the whole world, so this is not an isolated case.
Wang Xiaoli introduced: Depression in adolescents is related to childhood trauma, family education relationship and individual temperament. The anxiety caused by war or terrorist attacks is at least geographically restricted, and the lethality of the epidemic in recent years has "no national boundaries". In recent years, under the psychological conflicts caused by academic pressure, parent-child conflicts, deep Internet addiction, and procrastination, the mentalization of the inherently immature mind has become increasingly fragile and sensitive.
Xiao Nan (pseudonym) is a senior student who is about to graduate from undergraduate studies. He has excellent grades and is close to his roommates. He is a good role model in the eyes of friends and a good child in the mouth of parents. However, after she had completed her graduation thesis and obtained her internship certificate, a heartbreaking bad news came unexpectedly... Xiaolan, a friend in the same dormitory, returned to the dormitory after class, found that the dormitory door was locked and the outside was covered with police and classmates. From the mouths of the housekeeper and the school leader, she learned that her good friend Xiaonan hanged herself in the dormitory today...
The teacher handed over the suicide note that Xiaonan wrote during her lifetime to Xiaolan. When Xiaolan read her best friend's suicide note, tears couldn't help but wet the heavy paper. It turned out that this good friend, who suffered from depression for many years, had never mentioned this to her roommates, but it was too late when her parents and friends learned about it. Xiaolan, who had a haggard face and a choked voice, kept repeating this: "It was obviously together yesterday, she was by my side, it was obviously avoidable, it was all blamed, it was all blamed..." Director Wang is a trauma therapist and a trauma supervisor. Such things are not the first time she has dealt with crisis intervention in her work.
Director Wang said: "Youths are in a special period of growth and are undergoing a transitional stage from immature to maturity and from child to adulthood. This change makes teenagers prone to psychological imbalance and discomfort. Due to the stubbornness and paranoidness of adolescence, teenagers rarely share unpleasant things in school with their parents. They hope to have their own little secrets. As parents, taking into account the psychological characteristics of teenagers, the key is We must pay close attention to the instability and impulsiveness of the emotional in this age stage. In this state, impulsive and reckless behaviors such as suicide, self-harm, etc. After all, parents and friends should ensure the safety of their lives. "
The Medical Psychology Department of the Guangdong Corps of the Armed Police has been engaged in psychological treatment and consultation for children and adolescents for more than 10 years and has been committed to the daily work of children and adolescents' mental health education, family assessment and parent-child relationships. The teenagers on the verge of risk crisis are also major groups such as ward reception. Director Wang said: "Modern society is also the information age that has had a lot of impact on young people.Self-values are gradually forming, and curiosity and exploration spirit of social environment and new things are gradually increasing. However, because of the simple accumulation and sensitivity of the heart, it is easy to deviate from normal cognition in the cognitive process, and some unreasonable and incorrect ideas appear. "
The family and youth classes expected to be held at the end of 2022 are aimed at helping these families face this part of the dilemma correctly to rebuild hope. Director Wang said: "Young lives often have strong subjective pursuits for "how to survive", and this pursuit is a breakthrough in preventing suicide. Nowadays, parents focus more on the goal of making their children "grown" rather than "adult". "Adult" is actually the goal of the family, while the goal of the school is "grown". Every child is unique. For example, this child may not be good at exam studies, but he may be good at art. Therefore, parents should understand their children and communicate with their children reasonably. The idea of "a filial son appears under the stick" is not advisable. High-pressure methods can easily cause children to fall into a state of low self-esteem. "
Finally, Director Wang Xiaoli mentioned several points to parents and friends: 1. If adolescents are sad, anxious, or seem to be struggling, ask questions and provide help. When clarifying that adolescents have self-harm behaviors or self-harm ideas, do not blame them, but need to be understood and tolerated. What parents need to do is self-reflection, which is very heavy. 2. Listen to what the children say, observe what the children do, and do not look down on the dramatic threats of teenagers to commit suicide. The provocation often has unpredictable risk consequences. 3. At the same time, encourage teenage children to spend time with supportive friends and family to help teenage children eat well, exercise and develop regular sleep. 4 If Children of teenagers are receiving suicide behavior treatment, reminding their children that it may take time to feel better. Help children of teenagers follow the doctor's advice, and encourage teenagers to participate in activities that help rebuild confidence. 5. Don't think that the child is still young. His suicide thoughts are all about children's emotions. Pay close attention to the children's suicide, self-harm behavior and risks with psychological hospitals and psychiatric hospitals as soon as possible. 6. Parents should not ignore the disease and avoid medical treatment. Drug treatment and even hospitalization treatment when necessary is also a way to prevent and evaluate the risk of self-harm to avoid the occurrence of dangerous times. Don't miss the best treatment opportunity, try to ensure the safety of teenagers under the principles of early detection, early diagnosis, and early treatment.
Reporter of this newspaper Mai Bo Correspondent Cui Yanan Tian Naiwei
