Hello everyone, I am Ruyi Fangfei, I accumulate little by little every day, and my wonderful writing is full of thoughts. Very happy we met again.
shared "Knowledge Driver - Change Your Identity" yesterday. I believe you have also clarified what level of identity you want and are ready for change.
Today I will share with you "Cognitive Driven - Clear Your Odd Emotional Disorders" with you
Have you ever experienced these scenes: most of the day is safe and smooth, but a scolding from a leader, a scolding from a client, a complaint from a lover, a misunderstanding from a friend... casts a shadow on the mood of the whole day.
This is because our human genes have a "negative preference", which will make us pay more attention to negative information and events, and unconsciously ignore most positive and beautiful things.
Today I will share in three aspects how we can eliminate bad emotional disorders. First, pay more attention to your happiness and happiness; second, learn to move from simplicity to maturity; third, appropriate pressure can make yourself full of vitality.
Let’s take a look at the first aspect: pay more attention to your happiness and happiness.
First, pay more attention to your happiness and happiness
Some people may say that when encountering bad things, it is bad luck. If we live in an environment without any threats and worries, we can be very happy every day. This idea is beautiful, but not realistic.
There is also a view that when we live a worry-free life, we will indeed be happy for a while, but we will soon return to the original happiness baseline.
In other words, no matter what kind of happy environment you live in, you may slowly lose awareness, take everything for granted, and then turn a blind eye to it.
Look at the relationships around us. We always turn a blind eye to the efforts of our loved ones and naturally think that they will always be nice to us. When facing strangers, as long as they have a good attitude, they are easily moved. But in fact, relatives and friends give us more than strangers, so someone concluded: all the touches are brought by strangers.
will make you fall into deep thought. . .
Human beings are born troublemakers. The more we pay attention to, the larger the things we pay attention to. When we only have troubles in our eyes, we don’t realize that the world is beautiful and feel that it’s bad everywhere.
So if you feel that you are always unhappy, please don’t be depressed, because you are not lonely, and so are others. This is actually our norm.
In order to get rid of this trouble, we can look at the problem from a different perspective. Since we always pay attention to bad things unconsciously, we might as well do the opposite and try to see more good things. After all, we live in modern society, survival is no longer the most important theme, and survival is better.
There is a small way to help us get rid of this confusion, which is to record ""success diary" every day. In the past, we always let ourselves "reflect on daily", which also benefited a lot from it. But we turn on another mode of the brain. You can record 5 highlights of yourself every day, or anything you have successfully achieved.
At the beginning, although some are It is difficult. As long as we persist, it will help us realize the value of life and focus on what we already have.
If we always focus on things we have not got, we may live in unhappiness all day long. And how can an unhappy person go lightly to pursue and experience a better life?
We can follow the law of near, far and small, and even the smallest happiness will become great happiness. After all, in terms of quantity, troubles are always a minority in a day or a lifetime. We cannot let them stand too close to block many good things.
In short, we must be good at understanding the preciousness and beauty of a peaceful life around us.
Happy people have their own happiness, while unfortunate people are similar because they are all "fish that are in the water but cannot see the water".
If you want to be happier, you must become the fish that can see the water.
Let’s look at the second aspect: learn to move from simplicity to mature
Second, learn to move from simplicity to mature
In the world of many people, they can only accommodate what they like and can only accept the order they like. If there is a slight disturbance, the external situation will make you feel very tricky, and the inner world will easily slide to the edge of collapse.
The real world is originally complex. If we keep living in a "binary" world that is either black or white, our living space will become very narrow, because the deeper we go into life and society, the more we will come into contact with people and things we don't like.
We will meet bosses I don’t like, colleagues I don’t like, jobs I don’t like, I will be impatient with the nagging of elderly parents and crying with young children... If we only have disgust and rejection of everything, wouldn’t we be depressed for the rest of our lives?
Therefore, a person's maturity must move from the "binary world" to the "multivariate world", and our thinking must also move from the " binary opposition " to the "multivariate mutual existence". If we do not take the initiative to get out of the binary opposition world, we will never be able to recognize the true appearance of this world and will not be able to deal with complex and chaotic situations. After all, this world has its own layers.
. In a complex world, the evolution of things requires a process, and the result is often delayed. The current situation is often not the final result. Therefore, mature people are not in a hurry to get immediate results, and will not let the current uncertainty bind themselves, but maintain appropriate silence and patience, continue to focus on the things at hand, and wait for the best time to come.
Below I am looking at the third aspect: proper pressure can make yourself full of vitality.
No.
3, appropriate pressure can make yourself full of vitality
In life, everyone is pursuing a stress-free life once and for all, but a long-term stress-free life is obviously not the best choice. After all, without the accompanying motivation of pressure, we will soon fall into a situation of physiological degeneration, mental emptiness, and mental decline. Therefore, from a growth perspective, there is actually no difference between good and bad pressure, but there is a difference between severity and seriousness. Moderate pressure is an important cornerstone for us to maintain vitality.
Of course, the pressure here specifically refers to "moderate pressure", which is the kind of pressure that is neither very big nor very small.
The area where a person grows and progresses the fastest is on the edge of his or her ability comfort zone. Areas that are too difficult or too comfortable can easily make us stop.
If we replace the circle of ability with the circle of pressure, this rule is also true: too much pressure or no pressure will make us live a miserable life, while moderate pressure can make our lives a steady stream of happiness.
Some people gradually began to lose their will to struggle after having a stable job, and this mentality caused them to stop learning and live in a mess, so that they were at a loss when facing new challenges;
Some people found a satisfactory partner and felt that there was no need to continuously improve and improve themselves. This mentality caused their growth to stagnate and unable to synchronize with each other, resulting in an emotional crisis;
After achieving financial freedom, some people felt that there was no need to restrain themselves and save themselves, and began to indulge in enjoyment, resulting in losing their goals, being empty and bored, and eventually falling into a trough.
has entered the comfort zone. We can breathe a sigh of relief for a while, but we cannot relax to the end, because the disappearance and disintegration of the comfort zone "does not transfer by human will."
Smart adults will deliberately maintain a "moderate feeling". For example, when they face huge external pressure, they will give up some desires, lower their expectations, adjust some goals, or change their environment to relieve stress.
A secret to stress relief is to try not to set many goals at the same time, actively reduce expectations, and not rush to see results.
Therefore, it is recommended that everyone think about creating something no matter what line they do. With creative consciousness, we will take the initiative to reach the edge of our comfort zone. Whether it is physical, skills or cognition, as long as we have the guidance, feedback and motivation of our works, we will be happy and make continuous progress.
Today I shared with you "Cognitive Driven - Clearing Your Oddlers' Barriers", including: First, pay more attention to your own happiness and happiness; Second, learn to move from simplicity to maturity; Third, appropriate pressure can make you full of vitality.
I hope everyone can get out of bad emotions from these cognitions and clear obstacles to their growth path.
Tomorrow I will continue to share with you "Cognitive Driven - Methods and Paths of Growth" and welcome to watch it.
That’s all for today’s sharing. I am Ruyi Fangfei, thank you everyone!
