We all experience stress and anxiety. There are many ways to respond optimally when faced with stress. Imagine you are experiencing stress; maybe it's unexpected, maybe you expected it. Stress can trigger one or more difficult emotions, such as anxiety, doubt, or anger.
How did you react?
Do you respond to these emotions by formulating your values to a greater or lesser degree? For example, if you value fairness or love. Do you develop these values to a greater or lesser extent when you are faced with stress and strong, difficult emotions?
The answer may be more if you cope with it in the best way. Difficult emotions can push us toward our most deeply held values. This helps us get through stress in a resilient way and helps prevent mistakes. For example, if you value fairness, it can help you deal with anger in a balanced way.
How can you do this?
At this point, you might be thinking, “Well, that’s easier said than done.” Here, I’ll give you 7 practical tips for what to do when an unexpected (or expected) stressor throws you for a loop Recommit to your values.
1. Know what your values are.
For example, your values involve the following:
· Pay attention to your children
· Interact with people
· Do important work
Create your own similar list. There are no right or wrong answers. Feel it for yourself. What is your truest feeling?
2. Observe what naturally helps you accomplish the above tasks.
For example, these four things may naturally make you feel more likely to still enact your values:
· Take a walk
· Self-compassion
The Spiral Effect – Start with the smallest thing and slowly expand its impact. Article continues after ad
Again, make your own observations. What is real to you? What opened a crack in your pain that allowed you to live your values?
3. Put yourself in other people’s shoes.
When we feel threatened, we tend to think more about our own safety and our own perspective. This has a basis in evolution and conservation. The more you see others’ perspectives, the more opportunities you’ll see to implement your values—especially values like care, fairness, and common humanity.
4. Practice embodying your values more in all situations.
If consciously formulating your values is a normal thing for you, it will be easier to do so when you are stressed. If you've been looking for opportunities to do this, it will help you see the broader opportunities in stressful situations.
5. Note that some values are naturally consistent with managing stressful situations and encounters.
Values such as openness and curiosity are intrinsically related to handling stress. If you hold such values, think about how they apply.
6. Include ways to embody your values that feel like self-care or a treat.
What is the overlap between embodying your values and nurturing yourself? When you're under pressure, nurturing others and yourself in a values-driven way has benefits. Lifting the mood of others is a great way to regulate your mood, but don't just focus on being prosocial.
7. Stand out from what you usually do.
People often feel a lot of pressure to be consistent with healthy practices, such as breathing slowly to reduce stress, but practicing temporary time can also be valuable. Or look at things in your daily routine that might make you feel more relaxed, and try them more often.
Which of these suggestions appeals to you the most? The first step, of course, is figuring out what your most deeply held values are. If you haven’t done so yet, now is a great time to explore it.
Be careful to distinguish between values and outcomes—for example, health is an outcome and privilege, not a value. Values that you can express directly through actions.
