Approximate number of words: 4589 words
Approximate reading time: 6 minutes
Chapters of this article:
01. Parent-child harmony appears on the surface, but parents have not entered the child's heart
02. Suffered superimposed psychological trauma in school
03. When the child has a problem, the parents Don’t take chances
Recently, we shared the psychological intervention process of patient Xiaoyi, as well as his mother’s self-report article.
We have shared many cases of depression and bipolar disorder before, most of which required dozens of hours of psychological intervention. For example, patient Liu Ke took 57 hours; Xiaoxuan took 67 hours; and Xiaohong, who was in a very serious condition, even took 79 hours. If you do it for a few hours a week, it will take about 3 to 4 months.
Of course, if compared with mainstream psychiatric drug treatment and general psychological counseling/psychotherapy (from the beginning of treatment to basic recovery, the unit is "years"), our systematic and in-depth psychological intervention is already very efficient. .
Compared with the above patients, Ke Xiaoyi’s psychological intervention time was shorter, only 12 hours, of which only three times of trauma repair under deep hypnosis. Although it was short-lived, the effect was very good. He was admitted to the undergraduate program within more than one month after the psychological intervention, and now he has successfully passed the postgraduate entrance examination. It can be said that this is a very successful case.
Why is Xiaoyi’s psychological intervention so effective?
What are the key factors here that parents of patients can learn from?
The following is an in-depth analysis of Xiaoyi’s condition at that time, hoping to inspire other patients’ families.
01. On the surface, parents and children are harmonious, but parents have not penetrated into their children's hearts.
Xiaoyi's most typical symptom at that time was that he had a fever as soon as he went to school and was unwilling to go to school. According to his mother, the child just can't go to school, his mood has always been relatively stable, and he is quite happy to go out and play occasionally.
In fact, this is just an appearance. After in-depth communication with Xiaoyi, we found that he actually has certain emotional symptoms, such as anxiety, depression, pessimism, and insomnia, but they are not very serious.
If he had gone to a mainstream psychiatrist at that time, he would have been diagnosed with depression or even bipolar disorder.
Behind his symptoms, he actually suffered a large amount of superimposed psychological trauma, mainly from his family of origin and school.
In terms of family, Xiaoyi’s relationship with her parents is quite good, and daily communication is normal. However, in fact, Xiaoyi’s parents still lack a true understanding of their children, and they have inadvertently caused superimposed psychological trauma to their children, let alone communicate with their children. Establish effective communication methods.
Xiaoyi's mother said in her self-reported article that when her son encountered problems, she never consciously stood on the child's side to understand him, but blindly asked him to listen to the teacher. When other children want to take away her son's toys, she never listens to the children's opinions and feels that they should be given to others to play with, sharing and humility.
She later realized that this must have caused some psychological damage to her son.
The picture comes from the Internet
She didn’t know how to communicate effectively with her children. “We talked to death in 10 minutes.” On the one hand, this is because she has not mastered a healthy way of communicating with her children. On the other hand, Xiaoyi has realized very early that her parents cannot understand her and are unwilling to open her heart to them.
This resulted in him being bullied by his classmates, insulted by his teachers, and even feeling very anxious after he dropped out of school. He was unwilling to tell his parents, knowing that it would be useless if he told them, as his parents must be looking at someone else.
Therefore, if parents find that they have nothing in common with their children, and their conversations are all "awkward", or even quarrel when they disagree, it means that the parents have not penetrated their children's hearts at all.
Such a parent-child relationship may seem peaceful on the surface, but in fact there are many hidden dangers. Children are reluctant to tell their parents when something happens, and long-term accumulation can easily lead to superimposed psychological trauma.
In addition, according to Xiaoyi's memory, his mother once said to him, "Become a brave person." The psychological intervention was very short at that time and we did not have time to communicate this issue in depth with his mother.
It may be that her mother said it casually, but Xiaoyi over-understood it; or it may be that her mother really emphasized something to Xiaoyi, asking him to be calm and not panic when encountering things. She may even tell Xiaoyi when Xiaoyi is panicking. His mother also criticized him.
In any case, although Xiaoyi’s mother has a good intention, she has not mastered scientific methods. Objectively speaking, some of her education methods make Xiaoyi often deliberately hide her true emotions, especially fear, anxiety, panic, etc. So much so that when he was lost as a child, he would pretend to be calm in front of his parents.
As for Xiaoyi’s father, although Xiaoyi’s father never appeared during Xiaoyi’s face-to-face consultation and psychological intervention. But it can be seen from some information that Xiaoyi's father also lacks scientific education and high-quality companionship awareness.
Xiaoyi’s mother said that her husband had little control over her son. When Xiaoyi refused to go to school, his father almost beat him. Fortunately, Xiaoyi went back to his room and locked the door, and the father and son were temporarily isolated. Otherwise, being beaten by his father will definitely cause great psychological trauma to Xiaoyi, and may even cause him to develop obvious emotional symptoms, making it more difficult for him to return to school.
02. Xiaoyi suffered superimposed psychological trauma at school
Xiaoyi had no one to talk to at home and was lonely and depressed. This led to his psychological need for companions and friendship being stronger than that of ordinary children, and he very much hoped to make friends at school.
In primary school and junior high school, he did have some friends to play with, which could help him release some of his negative emotions, and the learning pressure at this time was not that great. But after entering a key high school with extremely strict management, he could no longer make friends in school.
He looked for classmates in high school, but encountered obstacles everywhere. The school did not encourage classmates to make friends. The classmates focused their time and energy on studying, and no one paid attention to Xiaoyi. After the first year of high school, Xiaoyi finally got to know some of his classmates, but as a result, they were divided into classes again in the second year of high school.
finally made it through the holidays. He reunited with his junior high school classmates, but found that his former friends had alienated him because of the lack of common topics in life and study. Moreover, the extracurricular entertainment provided by his old friends is rich and colorful, but his world is only about studying, and he doesn't understand the new things others talk about. Xiaoyi has a very low self-esteem.
Unable to make new friends and losing old friends, Xiaoyi's loneliness became more and more intense, and he began to isolate himself and live alone.
On the other hand, Xiaoyi was scolded as a "pig head" by the teacher, "poor guy" by classmates, flicked cigarette butts, etc., and witnessed the teacher humiliating other classmates many times. This all caused superimposed psychological trauma to him.
The picture comes from the Internet
In addition, the management system of that key middle school is indeed very inhumane. Everything is based on achievement, which almost drains all the students’ relaxation time. This kind of education method is distorted, even Xiaoyi My mother said it was "very perverted".
Xiaoyi's superimposed psychological trauma has been increasing, and his psychological pressure has been increasing. However, he seriously lacks healthy ways to relieve stress. After gradually developing emotional problems, he also developed severe learning difficulties . He is very resistant to the school environment. Finally, he said Nothing goes to school anymore.
And his "fever as soon as he went to school" was actually a somatic symptom caused by huge psychological pressure. It was not that he was pretending to be sick, but that he had a real low-grade fever, dizziness, and nausea.
After Xiaoyi’s parents transferred him to another school, this problem still remained unresolved. Moreover, the transfer itself also caused psychological trauma to Xiaoyi. He knew that many people in that key middle school were struggling to get into it. If he could persist, his college entrance examination score would probably be very high, but he could not persist and felt that he was a failure. .
Therefore, Xiaoyi’s symptoms on the surface are campus phobia and aversion to studying, but behind them are actually emotional symptoms caused by superimposed psychological trauma, but he is unwilling to show them, showing signs of "smiling depression".
Follow-up hypnotherapist Lucy used three sessions of deep hypnosis for trauma repair to deal with his emotional symptoms of pessimism, depression, and anxiety, and he naturally regained his motivation to learn. I didn't help him rebuild his efficient learning state. After he returned to school, he slowly caught up.
Therefore, it is very important to identify and effectively solve the emotional problems and deep psychological problems behind children's learning disabilities.
03. Parents should not take chances when their children have problems.
As mentioned above, if Xiaoyi goes to a mainstream psychiatric hospital, he is likely to be diagnosed with depression or even bipolar disorder. Strictly speaking, his problem is not a minor one.
But why did he successfully recover after only 12 hours of psychological intervention? We believe it is mainly due to the following three reasons.
First, Xiaoyi’s parents have a strong awareness of solving their children’s psychological problems and getting their children to school as soon as possible. After realizing that their children have mental and psychological problems, they find efficient solutions in a timely manner.
Xiaoyi’s parents did not understand their child’s problem deeply enough at one time and thought that they could solve the problem by changing schools and persuading the child earnestly. As a result, they tried many methods but nothing worked. They were at their wits end and had completely given up on their fantasy.
Under the introduction of my college classmates, they quickly decided to accept our psychological intervention and could not wait any longer. They seize the best opportunity for intervention when the child's condition has not worsened, the symptoms are relatively simple, and they can be treated quickly.
If Xiaoyi did not receive timely intervention and missed the college entrance examination that year, or failed the college entrance examination, he would most likely fall into a severe depressive episode.
Xiaoyi’s mother has seen other children who received psychological intervention in our area. Their mental complexion was so bad that they “can’t even lift their heads.” She realized that these children must have taken a long time to come to see them, it was too serious.
She is right. Many patients have taken many detours during the treatment process, seen many doctors, and received a lot of psychological consultation/psychotherapy, but the curative effects are not satisfactory. As the child's condition continues to worsen and the symptoms become more complex, it becomes more difficult and longer to implement psychological intervention.
Like the case of Xiaohong we shared before, she was delayed for 3 years due to illness, and she was still in her second year of high school after 5 years of high school. This not only caused psychological trauma to her, but also caused her to face more practical difficulties on the road to recovery. There were more problems in the world. We spent a lot of time, energy and went through many twists and turns before she recovered as well as she does now.
Secondly, Xiaoyi and his parents have a very high degree of trust in us, which makes the psychological intervention process smoother and more effective.
Xiaoyi's family was recommended by my college classmates. They trusted my college classmates and naturally had a good impression of us from the beginning. When I talked to Xiaoyi's mother on the phone, the analysis was more in-depth, and the level of trust became even higher. So much so that I asked them to go to some institutions in the north for medical treatment, but they finally decided to go south to see us.
Fortunately, Xiaoyi’s mother didn’t listen to me at that time, because I initially judged on the phone that Xiaoyi just had campus anxiety, and at worst it was just campus phobia, with no obvious emotional symptoms. But later, after an in-depth communication with him, I finally understood I know his emotional symptoms are not mild either. If they go to a mainstream psychiatric or psychological institution, it may be difficult to effectively resolve their emotional symptoms.
In comparison, many patients’ family members learned about us through the Internet and have certain recognition of us. The actual situation allows them to come for in-person consultation, but their trust in us is not high. After waiting for several years, it is still difficult to make a decision.
Of course, because our diagnosis and treatment concept is very unique and very different from what most psychiatrists and psychological counselors say, it is completely understandable that parents are hesitant and hesitant.
But objectively speaking, excessive hesitation does cause the child to miss the best opportunity for recovery. Even if he finally decides to come to us, psychological intervention will be very difficult, and we may not be able to receive treatment.
Therefore, generally speaking, families that can accept our systematic and in-depth psychological intervention have great recognition and trust in us. This is one of the important conditions for us to judge whether to admit a patient for treatment.
Because only with sufficient recognition and trust, it is easier for patients to enter a deep hypnotic state during hypnosis, and the effect of systematic deep psychological intervention will be obvious. Otherwise, it can be said to be a "waste" of both parties' time and energy.
Can we slowly build trust with patients and family members? In theory, it is possible, but it requires a lot of time and energy. We hope that these resources can be saved and left to more families who already have great trust in us. Xiaoyi is one of the beneficiaries.
The picture comes from the Internet
Third, before seeking treatment from us, Xiaoyi had not visited any other psychiatric department, nor had he taken psychiatric drugs. He had not suffered any secondary injuries caused by medical treatment, and had no side effects of drugs. His Cognition and understanding skills are very good.
Many patients are full of hope when they first seek medical treatment. They also think that treatment is very simple, thinking that they just need to take medicine as prescribed by the doctor. As a result, several doctors were changed, but the results were not good. Some doctors even said that it would be "hard to cure" and "take medicine for life". They would become more and more desperate and even refuse to see a doctor.
Some patients do not agree with mainstream psychiatrists, thinking that they only look at superficial symptoms and do not understand the patient's heart. The case we have shared is Xiaohong. When she was hospitalized at Beijing Anding Hospital , she pretended that her condition had improved and was successfully discharged. She once felt that no one could solve her problem, and her condition became worse and worse.
In short, after a child suffers from depression or bipolar , it is not that the more doctors he sees, the better. On the contrary, if the medical treatment process is always unpleasant and the condition does not improve significantly, the patient will become more and more pessimistic when it comes to medical treatment. Just conflict.
But Xiaoyi did not have these experiences. He was unwilling to see a psychiatrist when he dropped out of school, but because I was introduced by his mother's friend, he was willing to come.
In addition, Xiaoyi has not received general psychological counseling/psychotherapy, has not been misled by some unscientific information, has no distorted or wrong understanding of psychological intervention, and has no obvious resistance. So this also saved a lot of time. After one face-to-face consultation, I established a high degree of trust with him.
Of course, analyzing the above reasons is not to urge everyone to come to us for treatment. We currently lack large-scale treatment capabilities.
We want to tell parents through Xiaoyi’s case that when children have serious learning disabilities such as being tired of learning and being afraid of learning, it means that they are likely to have mental and psychological problems;
When realizing this, parents should not Don't wait, hurry up and learn scientific mental psychology knowledge, find a recovery roadmap suitable for your child, and get your child out of this predicament as soon as possible. Otherwise, the longer you delay, the more serious it will become.
Just like Xiaoyi’s mother said, it is useless for parents to have any illusions at this time, so don’t take chances!
Those so-called examples of "you will get better slowly" and "just grow up" are extremely rare cases. We should not bet our children's future and physical and mental health on such a very small probability, otherwise You will probably regret it for the rest of your life!
However, Xiaoyi only received 12 hours of psychological intervention, and we did not have enough understanding of some more in-depth psychological problems at the time.
So although he was admitted to university and recently passed the postgraduate entrance examination and recovered very well, he still had quite a lot of psychological risks.
This is also a problem that many parents encounter - their children's reverse quotient is not high, and they are usually in a good mood, but they become overly anxious when encountering major events. It's okay if the matter is resolved, but if they fail, they are really worried. The child's mental and psychological state may collapse or even relapse!
In tomorrow's article, we will analyze this topic in depth and provide some suggestions for Xiaoyi, Xiaoyi's parents, and parents who have needs in this regard.
#Emotional Comment Award# #Depression# #MENTAL PSYCHOLOGICAL DISORDER#
