Ciyuan Ciyuan Xiaocha 2022-07-06 00:00 Published in Henan Although he was in a hurry, the old guy was walking well on the road early in the morning. A beggar under the overpass suddenly hugged the old guy’s leg and said something He said: "Good Samaritan, why don't you give me so

Ciyuan Ciyuan Xiaocha 2022-07-06 00:00 published in Henan

Although he was in a hurry, the old guy was walking well on the road early in the morning. A beggar under the overpass suddenly hugged him. The guy's legs were still muttering: "Good Samaritan, why don't you give me some money for steamed buns!" The voice was sad and desolate, and the old guy couldn't help but feel moved. When he lowered his head, he saw that it was a fat man who was even stronger than himself. Man, so the old guy hid his kindness and said: "Brother, seeing that you are strong and not disabled, why do you want me to give you money?" The guy actually hugged the old guy's leg tighter and glared at the old guy. The guy said: "Brother, why are you like this? Just to get a few stinky money, do I have to maim myself?" So the old guy was persuaded, took out a coin and handed it to him, saying lovingly She reminded him earnestly: "Put it away, brother, don't drop it!" Who knows, this guy actually glared at the old guy again and said, "Brother, are you really sending me away to beg for food?" "Aren't you just... The old guy was interrupted when he was halfway through his words: "It's at least ten yuan. Is it easy for me to open my mouth?" Suddenly, the old guy had nothing to say, so he took out a ten-dollar bill and put it here. The goods were reminded, "Give me that coin too," and they hurriedly "delivered the goods" and left.

was in a hurry because a brother made an appointment with the old guy for coffee. Drinking and talking. Thinking about it, I hadn't seen this brother for a few days, so I asked with concern: "Brother, have you been doing well recently?" "Well, it's not bad. You work at home in a top 100 company in the world!" When the brother said this, he couldn't help but feel embarrassed. The guy took a high look and asked hurriedly: "Hey, the annual salary is quite big, right?" "Well, so-so, five or six million a year." "Wow, doesn't that mean you earn four to five million a month?" The old guy asked. Face envious. "Well, this is still the basic salary!" "Wow, manager? Boss?" the old guy guessed. "What!" The brother looked at the old guy calmly, "To tell you the truth, brother, I just want to express my ideals to you. Now I am still an ordinary employee, and I will still get two thousand yuan a month. When I become a "Boss... By the way, brother, please pay for the tea today, I'm a little short of money!"

left the coffee shop, feeling indescribably depressed. He looked at his phone and saw that it was almost noon, so he went alone. Get off the bus stop sign. When the car came, it was full of men and women, and it was impossible to squeeze through the front door. In annoyance, the driver glanced at the old guy and said, "Swipe your card first, from the back door." The old guy did as he was told, but when he ran to the back door, he saw that several of his legs were in danger of being caught by the door. . So, the old guy turned to the front door and complained to the driver: "What do you mean? My card has been swiped!" "Let's do it," the driver said with a calm smile: "I'll start the car and drive slowly, and you can run behind me." , I promise to let you get on!" Although he was confused, but thinking that eighty cents could not be thrown away in vain, the old guy still ran after the car. The car was about ten meters away when it suddenly braked. The men and women in the car all backed up to the front of the car, shouting "Oh my God!". Several legs at the back door were missing. The driver also smiled proudly and said: He tilted his head innocently and greeted the old guy: "Quick, come up!"

It turned out that this driver actually gained work experience in practice. The old guy sighed and got into the car, and the driver closed the door. However, at this moment, I suddenly heard a loud "ouch" sound from a lady next to me as she was killing a pig. Looking sideways, she saw that the car door had pinched her fingers. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry!" The driver hurriedly opened the car door and apologized.Unexpectedly, the fat lady refused to let go and shouted: "You pay, you pay!" During the exchange of words, the people in the car couldn't stand it anymore, and someone shouted to the driver: "We can't delay everyone's earning money because of such a trivial matter! Why not? "Why don't you pay her a hundred yuan!" Without waiting for the driver to speak, the lady shouted: "It's easy to say, at least I have to pay her a hundred thousand yuan!" Suddenly, "You are so beautiful!" The driver also got angry! , people in the car also said: "This is obviously blackmail!" The lady roared: "My husband is a billionaire! My fingers are delicate, but they are used to command him!"

Oh, it turns out that even the wives of rich families squeeze into the bus!

I finally got home and saw my son drooling and crossing his legs while watching TV. The old guy couldn't help but get angry: "I only know how to watch TV and don't do my homework!" This kid looked at the old guy. He glanced at it and said bitterly: "I don't even have a decent study room at home, so why do I want to study?" The old guy was stunned, looked around, walked up and gently stroked his big head and whispered comfort. He said: "Son, keep your voice down. Let's marry your sister off as soon as possible. Don't you have a study room?" The kid laughed as if he was enlightened and said, "Dad, you cook first, and I'll get off next time." Let’s go downstairs and play for a while!”

As soon as my son came downstairs, my daughter came back humming a song. "Hey, girl, are you in a good mood today?" the old guy looked at her and said. Niu smiled sweetly: "Dad, Wang Laowu bought me a big diamond ring this morning!" "Well, okay, okay!" the old guy said repeatedly. Suddenly, I felt something strange about her and asked quickly: "Girl, I remember you were wearing a red dress when you went out in the morning. Why is it yellow now?" "Oh, he insisted on giving it to me when I was at his house in the morning. When I was taking off my clothes, I accidentally soiled that one!" As soon as the girl finished her words, the old man's heart resounded, "You, why are you taking off your skirt, are you...?" The old guy was hesitant. "What!" Niu rolled her eyes at the old guy dissatisfied and said, "When I put on my skirt and asked him to measure it, he actually said that I should lose weight, so I took off my skirt and asked him to measure the weight of the skirt again, and then I could You know I'm not fat." Hehe, the old guy smiled: "The skirt is so heavy!" Suddenly, "That's not right, girl, isn't that..." The girl faced that guy naked, wasn't that... old? The guy didn’t dare to think about it anymore, but he heard the girl say proudly: "Dad, what are you thinking about? When I asked him to measure the skirt, I secretly wrapped his two dumbbells in it!"

It turns out that my daughter also What wisdom! Just as the old guy was sighing to himself, there was a loud knock on the door. A sweaty little boy stood outside the door and shouted: "Uncle, uncle, your son broke my window with a brick!" "What a naughty kid!" The old guy yelled secretly, and followed the kid. Building, I took a look and sure enough, a piece of glass in the neighboring building was broken. I quickly took out 20 yuan and said to the man standing under the window cursing: "I'm sorry!" The man accepted the money and also said "I'm sorry." . Unexpectedly, when my son came home, the old guy just said a few words with a sullen face, and then heard him say inexplicably: "No, no!" Although this kid is naughty, other than stealing the old guy's money and not wanting to write I usually don’t lie when doing homework, so I went to the man’s house with him. When I told him about the situation, the man was stunned. He looked at the old man and my son, and asked curiously: “That kid who smashed the glass in my house just now. Isn’t the boy your son? “Damn it, are all the children’s IQs like this now?

I had nothing to do in the evening. The old guy went to a brother's house to play alone. For some time now, the old guy likes to visit this brother's house whenever he has nothing to do. Of course, every time he visits, the old guy never forgets to remind his hospitable brother to stir-fry some peanuts and buy a large bottle of "Xiaoer" or something.That night, as soon as the brother opened the door, his dog pounced on him first. Suddenly, the old guy was a little strange: "Hey, brother, I didn't notice it before, why is your dog wagging its tail up and down?" The brother smiled bitterly. Said: "Brother, it's not like you don't know, my house is small!" Hehehehe, the old guy smiled and chatted up: "But this dog is quite good. When I came to your house before, it kept barking. Recently, he wags his tail when he sees me! Hehe, he must think of me as one of his own!" No, the brother looked at the old guy and said meaningfully: "That's not true, you come too often. , the dog is too lazy to pay attention to you!"

The old guy was stunned, blinked, and suddenly realized that this brother was trying to attract people in a different way! So, the old guy turned around and headed home without looking back. I was lying on the bed in the middle of the night, tossing and turning, thinking about all the things that happened during the day, and suddenly I felt emotional: Hey, what's wrong, even dogs are annoying!

(2014-D2 Comedy World )

# funny award #