LZ: Dad, this is my girlfriend Xiaomei... I found a girlfriend, who is quite ugly. She also knows that she is ugly and usually feels embarrassed to go out with me. Last night, I took her to the supermarket and heard two people whispering behind us: "Look at us in front of us, I d

1. The first time I took my girlfriend to see my dad~

　　LZ: Dad, this is my girlfriend Xiaomei...

　　Dad: Yes. . Not bad, I come to play often when I have time. .

Xiaomei: OK, uncle. .

　A month later. .

　　LZ: My father, Xiaomei and I broke up. .

　　Dad: It should be, after all, she is already pregnant with your younger brother. . .

　　LZ: Uh. . . My father. . . What happened this month. . .

2. When I was a child, I went to my uncle's house and slept with me at night. My aunt was afraid that I would be frozen, so whenever I showed up, she would stuff me into the quilt. Finally, my aunt got angry: Little bastard! Why are you constantly hiking out? What should you do if you catch a cold? I cried and said: I ate sweet potatoes in the afternoon, and it smelled so bad in the quilt! My aunt also tried it in the quilt, and she vomited when she came out.

3. I found a girlfriend, who is quite ugly. She also knows that she is ugly and usually feels embarrassed to go out with me. Last night, I took her to the supermarket and heard two people whispering behind us: "Look at us in front of us, I didn't expect anyone to be so ugly." After hearing this, my girlfriend blushed with shame. I think her girlfriend is ugly but she treats me very well. I won't dislike her. The two people behind continued to mutter: "Yes, that man is so ugly!"

4. Today I found that I had gained two pounds and said to my mother sadly, "Mom, I'm fat again." My mother attacked me without hesitation: "Why are you fat? Because others just eat a few bites, how many bites can you eat when you have enough!" Let me be quiet.

5. Lao Wang went to the pet store and wanted to buy a dog. Finally, he talked to the boss about the price. When he was about to leave, he suddenly thought of a question and hurriedly turned around and asked the boss: "Are you loyal or loyal?"

　The boss patted his chest and promised, "Of course! Every time I sold him, it ran back by itself!"

6. The health expert saw a vigor and physical body in college. The tough and steady old man asked, "What is your secret to staying young?" The old man said, "I keep revising 3 to 4 students' papers every day, and I spend 600 classes in a semester. By the way, I often stay up late to prepare lessons and make materials." Health experts: "My uncle, you live a long life this year?"

　　有: "30"