1. When I was teaching a little boy to play the piano, I felt that there was something wrong with his playing. So I said: "Get up first and listen to the teacher play it again." I played it once, then asked the boy to sit back in the chair and played again, and asked him: "How does it feel?"
The little boy said: "The chair feels much hotter than before. "
2. Looking at the report card my son got back, I said, "How did you get into school? Either a pass or a good grade. Is there anything better?"
My son quickly flipped through his schoolbag and handed me one. List: "Mom, the teacher said that everything in my list is excellent."
I took it over and looked at it. It turned out to be a physical examination sheet.
3. After getting married, my brother-in-law bought a second-hand car for 110,000 yuan, which was more expensive than a new car. My sister-in-law looked at the car she just bought and reminded her: Why don't you check it out? It's a second-hand car after all. Don't leave other people's things here. After hearing this, the brother-in-law began to inspect the interior. Under the passenger seat, I found a sparkling high-heeled shoe. Then my brother-in-law took it out and said excitedly to my sister-in-law: Wife, your high-heeled shoes are here. I finally found them! Isn't there something wrong in the air?
4. The daughter holds money in her hand: Dad, you always say that people rely on their face to make a living, your girl can also rely on her face to make a living! Dad: Ah, girl, it’s true! Daughter: Of course, Dad, look! Dad: Oh, really, girl, tell me, what’s going on? Daughter: I was teased by some boys in a dark place on the roadside last night. I held them back and said I wanted to be their girlfriend. Later, someone turned on their phone and took a picture of my face, and each of them got it. Five hundred dollars for me! Dad: ...
5. After the final math test report card was sent out, Little A asked Little B: "How many points did you get?" B said: "Oh, 25 points." Little A said: "You are so unlucky. Go home. You must be beaten, right?" Little B said: "How many points did you get?" Little A said: "10 points." Little B said: "Oh, it turns out you are more unlucky than me." Little A shook his head and said, "No. , I am luckier than you. If I want to score 70 points, I will add a horizontal line to the '1'. If I want to score 100 points, I will add a 0 after the '0', but you can't. "
6. I went to the beach with my girlfriend once. Vacation, sunshine and beach are really enjoyable. Suddenly I saw words like "Forever, XXX and XXX" and "I love you, XXX" written on the beach. So I said to my girlfriend, let's write one too. My girlfriend readily agreed, so I wrote it on the beach with a splash of ink. A big saying: "Those who follow me will prosper, and those who go against me will perish."
7. My son coughed. After checking, the doctor said: "He has a cold. I will prescribe him a bottle of pediatric cough syrup and he will be fine after eating it."
I said: " Please open two bottles."
The doctor said: "One bottle is enough."
I explained: "If I feed the child one spoonful, I have to drink one spoonful with him, otherwise he won't drink it."
