Author: Shirley
Lead:
every woman wants to meet her Mr. Right, then spend a lifetime spend his later years, Tu Lei emotional mentor once said: "happy marriage even then, the two sides have at least 100 I want to get divorced once, and I want to choke the other person 50 times" . From this sentence, we can see how difficult it is to run a relationship.
First marriage will have so many problems, let alone second marriage, especially those middle-aged and elderly people who remarry, the chance of happiness will also decrease. Because generally the middle-aged and elderly remarry, both parties have their own children. The first marriage only needs to face the contradiction between the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law and the lover, while the second marriage faces not only the relationship between the elderly, but also the other party’s children, who are not biological. It is difficult to balance and greet each other with a smile.
Every parent gives his children unreservedly. When the children encounter difficulties, the parents will lend a helping hand, especially when the elderly have grandchildren or grandchildren, toys and snacks are always bought. Usually, except for daily expenses, plus subsidies for children and grandchildren, the basic money is not much left. If you are a second-married couple, you may feel a little uncomfortable when the other party helps your children. This is also difficult for the second marriage. One of the reasons.
The next case is about the remarriage of middle-aged and elderly people. Obviously, there is a pension of 5000 a month. After remarrying, there is no money to buy food. What is going on? Look down together. Z3z
63-year-old Aunt Zhou’s self-report:
I am 63 years old this year, and my wife passed away when I was middle-aged. At the beginning, I didn’t feel much. At that time, I didn’t feel lonely at work, but since my old age, my children I have all moved out and I am retired. I always feel that my life is lonely and lonely. After asking my children’s consent, I found a wife to accompany me. Generally speaking, he is very nice and gentle to me. , I am also very content.
Originally I thought about who would not find a wife in my later years and go to my children’s home for the elderly. I can imagine it is very beautiful, but it is really difficult to do . After really staying at my children’s house for a period of time, I consciously returned to my hometown. Because the living habits of me and young people are too different. Although I don’t complain about living with my children, I always feel that I’m under the fence, and I’ve been living in my hometown for decades. It takes a long time to adapt to a new environment. Time, that's it, I returned to my hometown.
My husband and I started because I was sick. At that time, I just returned to my hometown and I fell ill. My wife was a former colleague and came to visit my house. Looking at me who was sick, he helped me burn it. After drinking boiled water and buying medicine, I took me to the hospital to see if I didn’t get better. Under his good care, I would heal after about two weeks. Z1z said that people who are sick are the most vulnerable. At this time, someone treats her well. It's always easy to impress her, and that's it. I have a good impression of my wife. It didn't take long before we remarried.
My wife is a former colleague of mine, so his pension is the same as mine, with 5,000 a month, I think we must have a good life after remarrying. First of all, we have enough money and our children are married. , I don’t need our help. My wife and I are in good health and can take money to travel . I imagined our two-person world, but didn’t want to. For a long time, I was beaten by reality.
Not long after marriage, my wife got sick, and I found that my wife’s children were not as filial as I thought. I thought that even if his children didn’t visit him often, at least the medical expenses would not be less. Thinking of his children knowing about it, they used to excuse themselves to be busy at work, not to go home to visit, and to call . I finally got through their phone. They didn't have a heart-warming word and only asked me to take good care of my wife.
I asked my spouse’s pension for 5,000 yuan, and if there is any savings, take out the medical expenses, but the spouse told me that the pension’s bank card is in the hands of the child, and the child only gives him 1,000 for a month.Fee, no deposit at all. I was stunned when I heard that his children are "cheating old people" , but now that I have married him, I am a person with a lot of affection, so I can’t ignore it, so I put me I took out my savings, and my savings were basically spent during the hospitalization of my wife and children.
After my wife was discharged from the hospital, new problems followed one after another. On weekends, my wife’s children would throw their grandsons with me, saying it was for my wife to enjoy the family happiness, but I think his children are just too lazy and don’t want to Bringing children, As long as they go home once, I have to prepare meals in advance. In fact, this invisibly increases my pressure . When I was alone, I only needed to cook one person’s meals, but now I have to To cook a family meal, I always feel that more and more energy and money are wasted.
Although I have some complaints in my heart, I have never complained to my wife, I always think about how my wife took care of me when I was sick. At that time, he also took care of my , but for a long time, I I found out that my wife’s spoiling of children is hopeless. Every parent at loves their children, and so do I, but I never spoil them like my wife.
’s wife’s pension card is not only on the children, even after my wife and I got married, his son also hinted that he would keep his grandson with us for a long time and let us two elderly people take care of it. I refused on the spot, and my own grandsons Without taking care of them, why would you take them for them?
Although his wife has recovered, he still keeps taking medication all the year round. He has no money himself, so I have to pay my pension to him again and again. For a while, I even ran out of money to buy vegetables. , I knew that his children were unreliable, so I had to call my children. After a while, my card was more than two thousand yuan. My daughter called and warned me: "Mom, I have no problem with you remarrying. But your retirement pension is 5000, and now you don’t even have the money to buy food. Are you remarrying to supplement others or make you happy?"
After hearing what my daughter said, I also fell into contemplation. Today, I just take care of my wife. He is exhausted physically and mentally, and his children do not give him living expenses. He also wants us to take care of his grandchildren. Did I marry them to help the poor? I really think his children have to make an inch.
I find that every time his son says something, his wife is silent by the side, and has no intention of fighting for herself. I feel that my wife is too weak, so disappointed, I finally proposed to my wife. Divorce, Since I got married, I have not been more comfortable than when I was single. On the contrary, all kinds of pressure are countless. Since remarriage is not as good as single, it is better to end it now and continue my single life.
Although I really want to have a wife to accompany me, but I can't be a free babysitter and help the poor all the time! I also have my own dignity.
Conclusion:
As everyone is more and more pursuing freedom, the divorce rate is also rising, leading to more and more second marriages. Aunt Zhou’s case illustrates the difficulty of remarriage. Older people will encounter them. To many difficulties, if you encounter unreasonable children in remarriage, it is really a horrible thing. It is not easy for to manage a relationship by itself. It also has their own children’s problems, which makes things that are not simple. Becomes more complicated.
In fact, if you throw away the shackles of your children and do not mix with other things, remarriage is a good thing, but the problem is that every parent can’t really make a choice between their children and their remarried spouse. Everyone chooses their own children. This is the situation of Aunt Zhou. The children are gnawing on the old, and the wife and children are also taking care of themselves, spending their savings, and even having no money to buy vegetables. In the end, the children are not filial, and the wife does not want. , There is nothing left.
Many times the elderly should know how to choose, and their children should not interfere too much when they grow up, and cherish the people around them who often accompany them, that is really reliable, and even if the children are filialNow that I have my own small family, it is impossible to focus all my energy on the elderly. Instead of letting the children nibble on the old, it is better to put aside the shackles of the children and live well with the people who love yourself, so that the chance of happiness will be greater. .
Do you think Aunt Zhou's divorce is right or wrong? Welcome to leave comments.
