01
There is a saying in "Deliverance":
"I have never felt so deeply that my soul is so far away from myself, but my existence depends so much on this world."
And we depend on the fulcrum of this world, nothing else, but family and family. It is precisely because of the existence of family and family that the soul has a place to live, and only when we live has upward beliefs and strength.
The so-called "family affection" focuses on the word "love" rather than the word "family".
This means that without blood ties, you can still have family affection. If you have blood ties, you may not necessarily have family affection.
This truth is learned by a 67-year-old Changsha man after experiencing the setbacks of seeking relatives.
His name is Yang Jun.
67, he has been growing up in Changsha. He has a pair of "parents" with a high level of education and three sisters. He has been favored like three sisters since childhood.
He even vaguely felt that the love his parents gave him was more than three sisters. Although he was a little confused, he didn't think much about it, and just thought it was a problem of his parents' thoughts and cognition.
It was not until his parents were dying that his father informed him of his true life experience and revealed his biological father's surname and ancestral home to him, asking him to find his biological parents to make up for his regrets and make his life perfect.
It turned out that when he was abandoned to the door of the Yang family, he was still in his infancy and was only one month old. After his adoptive parents got married, they were unable to give birth to a child and half of their daughter. Looking at the baby in the cradle, they decided to take it in and raise it after thinking about it.
There is still a note in the scrambled garment, which says the child’s birthday:
born on August 5, 1955.
After the adoptive parents wrote down the contents of the note, they saw that the child in the cradle looked extremely delicate and cute, so they named him "Jun". Because his adoptive father's surname was Yang, he had the name "Yang Jun".
In fact, Yang Jun's biological father's surname is Tan, and his ancestral home is Daolin Town, , Ningxiang . His biological father used to work in a porting club in Changsha. He has seven children in his family. Perhaps because he does not have the ability to raise his abilities, he had to send Yang Jun away, who is still in his infancy.
Yang Jun, who learned of his true life, was shocked and shocked, but he did not think too much. He knelt on the ground and told his adoptive father that he would not look for his biological parents. He grew up in the Yang family in this life, so he was destined to be a member of the Yang family.
In Yang Jun's heart, the kindness of raising adoptive parents is as heavy as a mountain, especially after decades of getting along with each other, the adoptive parents and three sisters are his closest relatives in the world. This concept has long been deeply embedded in the heart and is indelible.
Furthermore, considering the feelings of his adoptive parents and sisters, he would not seek relatives ungratefully. Even if he wanted to find relatives, it would probably be impossible to find them after decades, not to mention that his biological parents may not be still alive.
02
Five years after his adoptive parents passed away, Yang Jun, who is already 67 years old, still embarked on the road to seeking his relatives.
He himself never thought that there would be such a day, but because of the estrangement between brother and sister, Yang Jun, who was getting older, felt more and more lonely and lonely, and was more and more eager for the company and warmth of family affection.
He is most afraid of being alone in the dead of night. Tears often overflow in his eyes. He longs for family affection. He not only hopes to find his biological parents or relatives, but also grieves for the broken family affection between himself and his three sisters.
But in my opinion, he does not want the company of his relatives, but his heart, and needs to use the power of "family affection" to become calm and calm. What he desires is not someone around him, but the sense of security provided by "family affection" to the soul.
What is terrible is not the time alone in a person, but the loss of his home in his heart and becoming confused and lonely, like duckweed in the vast ocean, shaking, it is difficult to be stable and calm.
Unfortunately, Yang Jun’s journey to find relatives was not going smoothly, even with the help of the mediation team.
One of the "Tan Family" who is most similar to his life experience is proven to have nothing to do with him. The clues they obtained are cut off and overturned again and again, the hopes that are ignited are extinguished again and again, and the hearts that are ready to move are disappointed again and again.
This is full of difficulties, ups and downs and disappointments in searching for relatives, which made Yang Jun, who is over 50 years old, cry several times. He knew that the hope of family affection he longed for was extremely slim, so slim that it was almost impossible to succeed.
mediation group can only change their thinking and start by solving the gap between the four elder brothers and sisters of Yang Jun.
According to the old man, since his adoptive parents passed away, he felt that his three sisters were jointly excluding him who was not related by blood, especially when dealing with the inheritance of his adoptive parents, which made him feel that he was an outsider.
Adoptional parents once had a last word on their dying days, leaving a 79-square-meter property located on the university campus to the four brothers and sisters, everyone has a share and is evenly distributed.
should have been divided into four parts, but because the third sister paid 10,000 yuan when she bought the house, the four brothers and sisters agreed verbally:
convert the property into cash according to the market price, divided into five parts, the third sister owns two parts, and the remaining one part, and then transfer the property to the third sister's name after the distribution.
But five years have passed, but the problem of real estate disposal has been delayed again and again. Yang Jun is not eager for real estate distribution, but he guessed the attitude of the three sisters from this incident. He suspected that it was because he had no blood relationship with them, so the three sisters excluded him.
As soon as the thoughts came to the mountains and fields, Yang Jun felt more and more heartbroken as he thought about it. He thought that a brother who had been together for decades was not as good as a legacy, so he had the idea of finding a relative.
, is the fact really as he guessed?
03
mediation group found three sisters, two of whom were already university professors.
After some inquiry, I learned that the eldest and second sisters had no idea about this property, and they rarely involved in the disposal of real estate for five years, and they also had no concerns about the property they owned.
When the third sister faced the camera, she finally revealed the unspeakable truth.
She and her husband often quarrel, and their marriage is extremely unstable, and they are on the verge of divorce. Therefore, they are unwilling to let this house become her property during marriage. That is the last retreat left by her mother and the greatest confidence for her to divorce.
Because of face issues, she had never mentioned these bad things to her brother and two sisters. Unexpectedly, she accidentally hurt her brother Yang Jun's emotions, and she felt very guilty and guilty.
She said in tears that in another year, she will be able to handle family issues and make reasonable distribution of the property. At the same time, she also supports her brother in search of relatives. No matter what the result is, they will always be the best brothers and sisters and relatives.
The old man Yang Jun also turned red after learning about his sisters' attitude, and felt extremely ashamed.
It turns out that everything is just that he is suspicious. It turns out that even though he knows that there is no blood relationship between his brother and sister, the three sisters are still treating him as relatives.
As for his biological parents, he has taken it lightly. It is the best way to find it, but the regret of his later years. Perhaps it is God's will, and he does not force it.
After all, his anxious heart has a home and no longer wanders.
A misunderstanding almost ruined decades of family affection. How glad it is, but it is not difficult to see the truth from it:
The so-called family affection does not rely on blood ties as a bond.
Even if the person with the strongest blood relationship is no different from a stranger. On the contrary, even if a person with no blood relationship has love as a bond, it is the best family affection.
In this short life, cherishing what you already have now seems more important than pursuing the fallen leaves to return to their roots.
