Two months ago, I was drying clothes on the balcony, and my husband was sitting on the sofa in the living room playing with his mobile phone. Suddenly, the neighbor downstairs came to call her husband and asked her husband to help lift the cabinet. Her husband put his phone on the sofa and followed her downstairs.
I hung my clothes and passed by the living room. Someone happened to call my husband and found that my husband was leaving in a hurry and forgot to lock the screen on his phone. After Ms. Yang answered the phone, she found it was an advertising phone and hung up. Then, I was curious for a moment and checked my husband's phone without realizing it. I was completely stunned when I found out this. The chat records were full of love words from my husband and a woman, and the two of them even made an appointment to go to check in.
I was originally very satisfied with my marriage, and I never thought my husband would cheat, but now it was a mess. Only then did we remember that we had not had sex for two months, and we felt his indifference in the middle, but I was very busy with work recently, so I chose to ignore it. After discovering
, we talked about it and said that he wanted to get a divorce, but he didn't know how to arrange the child. I cried alone all night, thinking of an 8-year-old child, thinking of this twelve-year relationship, but still couldn't bear it.
I called my good friend and family in the evening. Everyone thought that after all, we had a child, so we should communicate well. Although it was his fault for cheating, some of my own handling methods were also problematic.
The next day I sent him a message saying that he would ask him if he wanted to fix this relationship. If it was to fix it, let’s put the problem out and talk about it carefully. Then there is no third person in the marriage, otherwise no two parties will go there. If you don't want to fix it, get a divorce. He replied to me that he would try it together. Then we sat together and I asked him to delete the woman outside’s WeChat and phone number. He obviously felt that the request I wanted caught him off guard, so he did.
The next day I went to work. He was at home. I went home from get off work that night and found that he added the woman's WeChat and phone number and pulled it out of the blacklist again. Then I asked him, and he said he had to explain it to others.
Next they contacted him using QQ until two days later, I discovered that my husband explained that the woman contacted him. In the next time, I would call to check the post from time to time. The relationship between our husband and wife gradually improved, and the sex life became normal. But two days ago, I checked his phone again and found that there was a record of a hotel on his phone, which collapsed in an instant.
I found that they are still in contact. This time I was furious and determined to get a divorce. Before going to go through the procedures, he told my mother-in-law that he had cheated on him, and my mother-in-law scolded him and firmly disagreed with our divorce. Later he said he didn't want to get a divorce either. what do I do?
or above is a self-reported by netizens. Gu Feng suggested: If this happens, in order to minimize the damage, you have only two choices: either completely forgive his mistakes, work hard to repair the cracks, and go through the rest of your life; or give up completely and leave decisively. Here, the most important thing is your attitude. No matter what your final choice is, it must be thorough.
If you are born with a strong temperament and cannot tolerate sand in your eyes, and you will definitely not tolerate his emotional betrayal, including mental cheating , then just choose to give up.
If you cannot give up your marriage resolutely, whether for your children, for both parents, or for yourself, then choose to forgive completely, forget his betrayal and hurt, and try to live the present and grasp the future with him.
If you choose to forgive, you need to have a thorough talk with him. Whether the other party wants to continue the marriage and whether he has completely cut off his relationship with the outside world must be clear, otherwise forgiveness will only hurt yourself again. If he has no regrets, and says he will make changes today and commits it tomorrow, and he will not change it again after repeated instruction, then there is no need to maintain this marriage.
You have made tolerance and sacrifices for your children, but he still doesn't care about your behavior. It is difficult to maintain this marriage, and it is even more impossible for him to return to the family wholeheartedly. Tolerance will only become worse, so you should still consider this marriage carefully.
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