Readers wrote in this way: I am a rural man who works on construction sites all year round. When my son was not in school, my wife took care of him in my hometown. After my son went to school, my wife followed me to work everywhere, and my parents helped take care of my son. My w

Readers wrote in this way:

I am a rural man and work on construction sites all year round. When my son was not in school, my wife took care of him in my hometown. After my son went to school, my wife followed me to work everywhere, and my parents helped take care of my son. My wife’s daily job: cooking for everyone at the construction site where I work.

Three years ago, my wife became pregnant again. My suggestion was: get rid of the child, because we already have a son, and it is not easy to educate our son well. But my wife insisted on giving birth to the child in her belly, and I couldn't do anything about it. During this period, my wife lived in her hometown for nearly a year.

The second child is a girl. The arrival of our daughter makes my wife and my parents very happy. They think that having a son and a daughter can make a "good" one, but I am not happy about the arrival of my daughter because the burden on me is too heavy. aggregated. It can be clearly felt that my wife treats her daughter better than her son. Even the parents-in-law say that wives should not favor daughters over sons.

Some time ago, my daughter fell ill and was taken to the hospital. When I did a blood test on my daughter, I found out that she was not my biological child. When I questioned my wife, she saw that she could no longer hide it, so she could only tell me the truth: my daughter’s biological father was the contractor who paid me my salary. I was absolutely furious. I found the contractor and beat him up. In the end, he was willing to pay 200,000 yuan to settle the matter privately. Then, I followed him to the bank. After I got the money, I walked away. After arriving home that day, my wife and I had another heated argument. In the end, I made a difficult decision: to give my daughter away.

My wife does not agree to give away her daughter. The reason given by her wife is: Although your daughter is not your biological child, she is still a life after all. However, the existence of my daughter is simply a shame to me. For this reason, I often quarrel with my wife because of the existence of my daughter. I can no longer care about my daughter at the least, and I often even abuse her inexplicably. . I also know that my daughter is innocent after all, but I can't control my emotions. Faced with this situation, what should I do?

Muzi Li Emotional Analysis:

Give your daughter away. A normal man simply doesn’t have the courage to raise his wife and his lover’s daughter. It would be the greatest mercy not to divorce your wife because of this matter. Of course , the reason why you did not choose divorce may be because you considered the costs of divorce and remarriage. In handling this matter, you did the least beautiful thing: since you planned to give your daughter away, you should not have accepted the 200,000 yuan from your wife's lover. You should have given your daughter to him to raise. Maybe you have the following considerations: 1) You need to be compensated for the humiliation he and your wife have given you; 2) You have raised your daughter for 3 years, and you want to get back the money you spent on your daughter; 3) You are also relatively scarce about money. Now that the money has been collected, don't return it.

You must be tough on giving your daughter away, and you can even threaten divorce. Although your daughter is not your biological child, she has been raised by you for three years. You and your daughter still have some feelings for each other. When giving your daughter away, do not give it away casually, but try to find a better condition for your daughter. A better family would have an explanation for this poor girl. Although people are poor and short of ambition, there is one thing that needs to be reminded of you: go work for a different boss, and never work under the previous foreman, otherwise, you will look down on yourself. During this period, you also need to give your wife this warning: If she cuckolds you again, divorce will not be discussed.

Why don’t you have the courage to divorce? Answer: You actually have the idea of ​​​​divorcing, but marriage involves too many things for you, including giving your son a complete family; marrying a wife is not easy; divorcing and reorganizing a family is a money-burning process. . For this reason, you think the most cost-effective way at the moment is to give your daughter away. In this way, when you can't see your daughter, you can form an out-of-sight and out-of-mind effect on your wife's dark history, and in time In this wasted time, ignore this dark history of your wife.People, in fact, all follow Naihe's path. If you now have a stable job and your parents have pensions, I believe you won't have so many worries: the divorce is over.

I believe that everyone wants to live with dignity, but not everyone can live with dignity, because many times they feel that living is enough, so that they have such feelings in life: I have a wife who has It's not easy. It's not easy to have a child anymore. These people are often more willing to tolerate it than those who have choices. For this reason, don’t reveal too much about these things between you and your wife to the outside world. You will not get much sympathy, but will only get more ridicule. After giving your daughter away, if anyone asks where your daughter is, just say you can't afford to raise her and give her away.

would like to remind everyone: Because each of us is in a different situation, there is no need for us to use our own perspective to judge other people's lives; nor should we use our own moral standards to say that some people around us are worthless. In fact, each of us will envy the lives of those who have no worries about food and drink, but we cannot become such people. As a result, more people live in a state of living that is more than enough than above. At this time, we hope to be respected by those who are doing better than us. In the same way, those who are doing worse than us also hope to be respected by us. Therefore, in life, if there is no interest between each other, , please let us try to be kind.

Many times, we feel that life is bad not because the profession we are engaged in is dirty and tiring, but because we feel particularly uncomfortable when there are too many disdainful looks around us. What I want to say is that making clean money with hard-working hands is glorious in itself. At the same time, we also need to admit something: many people, including us, will involuntarily look at people through colored glasses on certain occasions. For this reason, we work hard, not only to make our lives worry-free, but also sometimes to win more respect for ourselves. As an adult, you must work hard to make money, because once you have money, you will have better options for many things.

Editor's note:

Although it is said that if you want to live peacefully, the best attitude is not to envy others and not to look down on yourself, but humans are social animals after all, so how can we avoid the link of dealing with different people. In this case, it will naturally lead to a psychological imbalance at some point, driven by a comparison mentality. At this time, you only need to tell yourself that you must continue to work hard on the road of hard work. During this period, you must set some small goals for yourself and achieve them, and then set new small goals. When you always have a sense of accomplishment in life, life will have a head start.

In fact, everyone's life is not easy. During this period, they will feel that society is complicated, people's hearts are difficult to understand, there are also worries that cannot be let go, and endless ups and downs. Even if there are times when you feel that your life is meaningless, not wanting to die is the reason for living. During this period, the intertwining of emotions and the rush to make money have become the norm in our lives. During this period, parents, lovers, and children are the most indispensable spiritual food for us on our journey of struggle.

(pictures from the Internet, pictures and texts have nothing to do with it)