actor Liu Mintao revealed his sad past in a speech about middle-aged rebellion.
When she and her husband traveled to Japan, when they passed by an ice cream shop, she wanted to eat a matcha ice cream, but her husband refused.
And she herself was penniless at the time, so she could only regret it.
A small ice cream made her think deeply about the happy life of women.
Marrying a man and living the life of a husband and a child is really a woman's life's happy choice?
In fact, many women have had similar experiences.
In my heart, I will ask myself countless times, why do I also pay for my family, even lose my job, and come back to focus on the housework and children, but in the end I am unable to decide to buy the thing I want?
Why did the original sentence "I will support you" become "what else can you do except ask for money".
What used to be "eyes full of you" will become "eyes full of hatred for you".
Is it really just that love is fleeting or that it is not good to meet someone?
Lu Lu said in the book "Thirty-something, too late":
Today's women face the society directly, and a woman must be a person first, and then a woman.
This means that you are a member of society and have social responsibilities. To create value, you have to pay personal income tax.
You must have your own opinions and make your own voice. Women must be able to stand in the family and society.
How can women live independently?
First, get rid of the idea that finding a good man can lead to a happy life
Many women think that marriage is the second reincarnation.
As long as you can marry a good man and live a married life of "the male leads the outside, the female leads the inside" without worrying about food or clothing, you will be happy and complete in this life.
But is that really the case?
When his career was flourishing, Liu Mintao chose to return to his family, befriend her husband and teach her daughter, and lived a good material life after marriage.
But why was her happiness shattered by a mouthful of ice cream?
Because of , she placed her happiness on her husband and chose a secondary dependent position in the family.
Why does a woman give up her right to live independently when she returns to the family to be a good helper?
Hasn't China had a beautiful marriage in the style of "men farming and women weaving" since ancient times?
Why is the current "male lead outside, female lead inside" not working?
We must admit: is the most important thing for the family to open source.
If a family has no income, what is the point of a happy life?
Therefore, The person who can generate income for the family must be in a dominant position in the family;
The person who cannot generate income for the family is in a dependent position.
In the past, men ploughed and women weaved, and women weaved cloth. In addition to the household, the excess cloth was also used to exchange money to subsidize the household.
Women, like men, are generating income for their families.
Their status is equal, there is no one who depends on who, so they can create a beautiful life scene.
But now the "male host outside the female host" is different.
Although women have paid, they have not brought income to their families, and they have to depend on men financially, so how can they be independent?
If a woman wants to be happy, she must be independent and cannot depend on others;
It is difficult for a woman who is not independent to control her own life.
And women want to be independent, first of all, they must be independent in ideas, get rid of the idea that finding a good man can enjoy a lifetime of happiness;
And then go to seek economic independence.
Second, face the fear, step out of the comfort zone, realize self-worth
When a woman adapts to the current state of life, even if she is not very satisfied with this kind of life.
Many times, they will continue to live like this, even if they are aggrieved.
Because they are familiar with everything in front of them, They are afraid to step out of the so-called "comfort zone", and are afraid to explore more possibilities for themselves.
Liu Mintao once feared and retreated in marriage, allowing himself to live a widowed married life in a familiar and comfortable environment.
But she was not happy.
If a woman wants to live an independent and happy life, she must constantly step out of her comfort zone, explore more possibilities for herself, and realize self-worth.
Liu Mintao finally ended his seemingly comfortable luxury life in the 7th year of marriage and mustered up the courage to pursue the happy life he wanted.
After the divorce, she picked up her beloved acting career again, and continued to explore more possibilities for herself.
This not only allowed her to create a classic character like the eldest sister in "The Pretender" on the screen.
She also participates in variety shows, challenging dubbing, singing, giving speeches, and getting involved in the fashion industry.
She constantly challenges herself and breaks through herself. In her own words, she is "relying on yourself and being yourself".
Take the happiness of your life firmly in your own hands.
Many years later, when Liu Mintao finally relied on his own efforts, he ate the matcha-flavored ice cream that he wanted to eat but didn't.
She said: that is the taste of freedom.
Therefore, if a woman wants to live an independent and happy life, she must overcome her fear and get out of her comfort zone, constantly break through herself, and explore more possibilities for herself.
3. Improve your ability, work hard, and become financially independent.
But in fact, when a woman asks for money from the palm of her hand, few of them will be confident, let alone an independent and happy life.
The economic foundation determines the superstructure, and this sentence also applies in marriage.
Without the ability to be financially independent, a woman's happiness is like a castle in the air.
A friend of mine who is far married quit his job because he was pregnant and expecting a baby.
The child has been stared at by her mother-in-law before she is a month old. Every time she eats, she will hear her mother-in-law say that the food is too expensive.
The husband is not involved in taking care of the baby, and the baby will cry, "I can't take care of a child. I am tired from work, and I can't sleep well." I don't care how much my mother-in-law complained.
She worked hard to prepare for the admissions exam while working, and two years later she was admitted to a public school.
She said that before buying a piece of clothing, you had to look at their faces, but now can finally buy the things she likes boldly , and the family will not complain to her.
Every woman, don't give up your efforts at any time.
What others give is a surprise, and what I earn is confidence.
Only a woman with confidence can control her happiness in life.
Summary
If women want to live an independent and happy life in this life, remember to make themselves do these three things:
. Get rid of the concept that finding a good man can lead to a happy life.
. Face your fears, step out of your comfort zone, and realize your self-worth.
. Improve your abilities, work hard, and be financially independent.
A woman's happiness is never in the hands of others.
It is not that marrying a good man can guarantee you a happy life. The world of is full of too many changes and temptations. No one can guarantee a happy life.
Women, no matter how old they are, only when they are independent and strong can they truly have the ability and confidence to make themselves happy!
