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1. There are differences in choosing to give up children
Shaoshang’s mother Xiao Yuanyi was designed by Jun Gu and Ge Shi, and had to leave a child in the Cheng family. However, Xiao Yuanyi chose to keep her daughter Shaoshang without even thinking about it, and took her newborn third son Shaogong, her eldest son and her second son to Gucheng together. Concubine Yue was different. She chose an equal approach and entrusted her children to others together. She did not take any of her children with her. Regardless of whether they were boys or girls, they were all treated equally. Since the situation is destined that I cannot accompany you to grow up together, then I will be impartial.
But Shaoshang's mother chose to take all the boys to the battlefield and leave the girls behind. From this, we can also see her partiality, loving the boys more than the girls. This also laid hidden dangers for their mother-daughter line later.
If Shaoshang's mother had been more decisive and tough, I think Shaoshang would have understood her mother's approach, but she did not do this. She had not sent a letter from home asking about her daughter's life for many years. She only focused on raising her son and was busy guarding the country with her husband, but she ignored the existence of a daughter.
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This shows the difference between her and Yue Concubine, who is unable to be decisive; Yue Concubine is the kind of person who would rather offend everyone than take any side. She chooses to work in unison. If the children all hate her, then she will admit it. After all, the fault lies in her own choice. This is one aspect where she is better than Xiao Yuanyi.
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Because in the child's psychology, if there are others at home, he can still be with his parents, but when he is alone and not together, the child will feel lost and abandoned. But if all the children are abandoned by their parents, then they will look at the problem from a different perspective, and at least there will be no gap between siblings.
2. There are differences in the people they choose to entrust their children to.
In the play, we can see that the two people immediately differed in who they entrusted their children to.
We know that Xiao Yuanyi was left as a young Shang after being designed by Jun Gu and Ge Shi, so the people she entrusted her daughter to were these two. Think about it, a person who can design to keep your daughter by your side for profit will be so kind to your child after you turn around!
Jun Gu loves money, favors boys over girls, Ge is cunning, jealous of big families, and has no magnanimity. Will these two people have no grudges and try their best to raise Shao Shang well? Of course not. Although his family had a rich fortune and many servants, the young merchant went hungry every day, let alone read and literate, and was ridiculed and vulgar. She knew clearly that Jun Gu and Ge Shi were unreliable and would abuse her daughter, but she still chose to ignore them.
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But you see that Concubine Yue is different. She entrusts her children to trustworthy people. The second princess and the third prince are given to Queen Xuan to help take care of them, while the third princess is raised by Xiao Yuehou and his wife. Both of them are people she can trust. One is the gentle and virtuous queen in the palace, and the other is her own brother. She has a thorough understanding of the character of both of them. They are both trustworthy people, otherwise she would not entrust the child to her carelessly with her cheerful temperament. On the surface, Concubine Yue did not personally raise and teach her children, but behind the scenes, she worked hard to plan for her children. Even if she was not around, she could pave the way for them to grow up healthily, and it would be difficult for them to go astray.
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3. Differences in attitudes towards what they saw
After returning home victorious, the attitudes of the two towards their children can be distinguished at a glance.
Xiao Yuanyi's attitude towards Cheng Shaoshang was obviously to make up for the debt she had owed to her daughter for more than ten years, but in fact it was all kinds of disgust. In her eyes, she believed that her daughter Shaoshang was not only uneducated and incompetent, but also relied on her little cleverness to cause trouble everywhere. She did not behave like a girl.From the first moment she saw her daughter Shao Shang, she was full of prejudice against Shao Shang. In her mind, she labeled Shao Shang as naughty, disobedient, and naughty. Therefore, everything Shao Shang did was wrong in her eyes. Even Shao Shang's kindness in inviting Aunt Ge to eat was full of calculation and ignorance in her eyes.
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She has never thought about why her daughter became like this, why she targeted Jun Gu and Ge Shi in this way, and what was the purpose of her daughter doing this. She always spoke with what she saw with her eyes, and never really understood her daughter's inner thoughts, let alone seriously inquired and searched for the reasons why her daughter became like this.
was busy grabbing her daughter's pigtails all day long. She should have found someone who bullied her daughter to vent her anger on her behalf, but instead it turned into a daily battle of wits between mother and daughter.
But on the other hand, Concubine Yue is different, especially the part where she is talking about the third princess, which is particularly interesting to watch. It is obvious that she is scolding and sarcastic towards the child, but her original intention is to think about her daughter. Otherwise, letting her daughter wear bright red on such an occasion would be a suicide. Later, I took the initiative to find plain clothes for my daughter to change into. Concubine Yue told the truth about all the things she said to the three princesses, and she followed the principle of seeking truth from facts. She did not exaggerate or distort the facts, so her complaints and education will not arouse our disgust. Coupled with the tone and wording of Concubine Yue's speech, which is serious but also a little humorous, it is easier for people to accept it than the straightforwardness of Xiao Yuanyi, the young Shang's mother.
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4. Learn how to be a human being first, then educate others
Judging from the way Concubine Yue and Xiao Yuanyi educate their children in the play, although they are educating their children, they are actually showing all aspects of their lives. If you cut into the details carefully, you will find that they are different in how they treat others.
Maybe we all hope to become someone like Concubine Yue, and don't want to be a common person like Xiao Yuanyi, but in real life, we are all common people, and this cannot be changed.
Only by growing up yourself can you better educate the next generation!
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