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In this inclined society, people are comparing at all times and anxiety is everywhere. It is precisely because of this environment that many people suffer from different degrees of anxiety disorders and are "urgent" about their anxiety symptoms.
From a psychological point of view, anxiety is a psychological symptom caused by people's "out of control" of reality and facing future uncertain events.
Because it is too uncomfortable, many people will keep themselves as far away from anxiety as possible. Try to avoid it, resolve it, or surpass it...
But the facts are completely opposite. On the one hand, escaping anxiety causes more serious anxiety, because the vicious cycle of stress reactions leads to many psychological problems, causing psychological diseases such as obsessive-compulsive disorder , phobia, etc., causing indescribable torture and pain to patients.
On the other hand, people only see the harm brought by anxiety, ignore the opportunities in anxiety, and miss many opportunities for growth.
In fact, each of us can discover the limitations of life through our own anxiety, and then awaken and change. On the contrary, once we eliminate anxiety, we bury our potential and destroy such opportunities.
Today I will take you to correctly understand anxiety and correct your misunderstandings about anxiety
First Anxiety helps us explore internal driving force
Second Anxiety is the nature of human beings
Anxiety helps us to be aware of ourselves
Anxiety plays a very important role in our development. When we feel limitations, anxiety will arise.
The world-renowned psychologist Verina Custer pointed out in his book "Updating Anxiety" that The earliest anxiety of human babies comes from the intimate relationship between their most important relatives such as childhood and parents. If separation anxiety at that time was not handled well, this anxiety will affect the intimate relationship between them and their most important relatives such as couples and children when they grow up .
Therefore, the root of anxiety is related to the word "intimacy", and all anxiety is carried out around the energy of "love".
has a close relationship. The boundary between people is the core of interpersonal communication. If a person cannot handle such separation anxiety well, it will cause serious psychological problems and find it difficult to trust others. Too much suppressed negative emotions will cause serious internal friction because it will not defend one's own psychological boundaries and will cause individuals to suffer from harm to varying degrees.
Because of entanglement in boundaries and relationships, people's attention resources are severely deprived and dispersed, which is concentrated in some negative information (negative preferences mentioned above). The attention to negative information will also be widespread, making a person gradually become pessimistic and negative about the whole world, and is like this in his career, feelings, and life.
If an individual cannot recognize the root cause of anxiety, he will not be able to reverse the situation, change the current situation of pain, and sink into a vicious cycle for a long time.
The meaning of anxiety lies in this, it is a transitional emotion in our life. It is painful and makes the cowardly unable to help but escape, but it is also effective and allows us to look directly at our true hearts .
People who are anxious will have a strong motivation to change. They will constantly reflect on themselves, explore the perceptual self, constantly correct, and ask clearly what they want in their hearts, so that they can return to the right direction.
The process of derailment, searching and connecting is very painful. Anxious people are often in the second transitional stage: looking for and wanting to grow, they must derail, and they must dissect the original shell, abandon the former external motivation, and face the fragile reality that is bloody in the heart, and then be aware, introspection in anxiety, temper the soul and enhance their minds without realizing it, and finally successfully find their true self, discover the "internal drive", and move on to the pace of integration.
psychologist Ausubel (Ausubel, Ausubel ) divided the motivation for achievement into three types: cognitive internal drive, self-improve internal drive, and attached internal drive . Although the latter is named "internal drive", it is essentially "external motivation". The real internal motivation is cognitive internal drive. Cognitive driving force is the individual's ability to improve themselves and master knowledge and improve their internal drives themselves - regarding achievements as the root of winning status and self-esteem, and auxiliary internal drives - to obtain approval, essentially to follow traditions and seek external appreciation and recognition. They do it for others to like.
Anxiety is the source of human instinct
anxiety, which can be explained by evolutionary psychology .
There is a word in psychology called: Negative preferences. Negative preferences refer to the psychological tendency of some unclear and uncertain situations that are regarded as dangerous by individuals before the truth is revealed. In layman's terms, it means always paying attention to negative news.
Negative preferences are a powerful tool that people gave to our ancestors during the evolution of humans. In primitive society, various adverse factors, such as harsh climates, natural enemies and food scarcity, may subsequently threaten the lives of our ancestors.
A hunting man will be nervous about the fall of a leaf on the ground, because it is very likely that there are wild animals wandering nearby. At this time, our ancestors will concentrate and keep their attention and protect their own safety, which arises.
will be easier to reproduce than other individuals who cannot adapt to the environment and pass on their characteristics to offspring.
We inherit the tendency to be nervous and anxious in specific situations, and it is precisely because this anxiety experience has survived through generations of human beings.
Although it is not applicable until now: anxiety can effectively help people survive and reproduce. But it won't help people find happiness. When a person is too anxious, his psychology will be disturbed, his self-confidence, self-control and adaptability will be reduced, and his ability to gain happiness will be greatly reduced.
So, when you feel anxious, don’t be anxious, hurry to drive it away, because it just comes out to "protect you" as usual. It once protected you carefully, but it is not applicable yet. What you have to do is accept it, and it will slowly say goodbye to you. On the contrary, if you are anxious to drive it away, you will only fall into greater anxiety.
- The End -
Author | Tommyda
Edit | Liu Liu
First psychological main writer group | A group of young people who like to look up at the stars
Reference materials: Jean Piaget Biographie. (2020, January 29).
WeChat public account: First Psychology
