Anxiety is relatively abstract and is a state of indecipherment and unclearity. It seems that if you in this era, if you don’t have a little anxiety, you will be an incompatible "monster".
So, we attribute bad emotions to anxiety, and constantly consume internally in anxiety to exhaustion.
Open anxiety, lead to the depths of anxiety, and explore where it comes from?
We summarize it in one sentence, which is not necessarily accurate. It is just a summary of the reason for anxiety, because we are not strong enough in our hearts.
For example: We are not willing to show our fragility, most of us will regard for tolerance as generous, and always be with us, we are very afraid of loneliness, and we cannot accept uncertainty.
These are manifestations of inner weakness, and it is precisely because of this that leads to anxiety, which leads us to a miserable situation. Therefore, we began to reject anxiety and tried our best to drive away "anxiety".
However, only if there is anxiety can you think and make breakthroughs. Only when there is continuous breakthrough can you have a bright future.
Today, let’s talk about the benefits of coexisting with anxiety.
01 boldly reveal your fragility
Most of us have been educated since childhood to "don't cause trouble for others". It is a big misunderstanding that only when we are not strong inside will we express negative emotions.
When will we be vulnerable? When we reply to
, doing nothing, being rejected, losing a loved one or something, etc., we are inevitably lost and frustrated, and even vulnerable.
You see, does everyone have this before? Why do we still need anti-human packaging and confrontation?
When you believe that you are worthy of being taken seriously, you can risk being unacceptable, reveal your true side and express your weak self-remembers, which is a manifestation of your high value.
Real expression is often easier to gain sincere relationships and love, and also to get a true sense of belonging.
Anxiety reminds you to take off the mask you want to be strong.
02 Don’t tolerate emotions, protect the boundary
A gentleman, graceful and graceful, endure for a while, calm the waves, and take a step back and the sky is wide.
But not all magnanimity can be a kind relationship and a happy ending. Sometimes, we need to truly express dissatisfaction or even anger, as long as we don’t hurt others.
When you are morally kidnapped by , you can say "no" loudly. Everyone has a moral bottom line. We don’t touch others’ bottom line, but we must also protect the sense of boundaries in interacting with others.
Once the self-defense is broken, what you need to do is not to endure, but to express your anger directly. Truely expressing your inner feelings is not to hurt others, but to let others understand the real you and your thoughts.
Let’s look at love, friendship, and various relationships in the workplace. It is often the process like this:
At the beginning, the other party is misunderstood; tolerate it in the middle, the other party is used to it; tolerate it in the later stage, the two parties break out, and then terminate a relationship.
Sometimes, your unreality cannot maintain your good image, return to simplicity, and it is easier to get closer to each other and go for a long time.
Anxiety allows you to learn to simplify the complex.
03 Stable sense of self-worth
"unworthy" psychology will make us pass by success. This incorrect self-feeling comes from the inability to affirm self-worth.
The self-worth mentioned here is not confidence, but that you can clearly know that you are valuable, no matter at any time.
For example, if we fail in an application, our first thought will often be to label ourselves "worthless".
In fact, if you can’t do something well or let others down, it doesn’t mean you have no value, it’s just that the value has not been reflected here.
At any time, we must understand that we are valuable, and our own value always exists in good times and bad times.
stabilizes our sense of self-worth and plays their role. We must believe that since everyone exists in this world, it must be meaningful and valuable.
. Confidence is different from a sense of self-worth. It does not mean that confidence can reflect self-worth. Confidence is just a firm belief in doing things. Without confidence does not mean that we have no value.
You have value, this is a very certain statement.
Anxiety improves your awareness.
04 Growth is done by itself
In the impetuous era, the simplicity of obtaining massive information makes us less and less alone. Our achievements need to be affirmed, and our sorrow needs to be comforted.
Requesting from outside makes you more and more anxious. Whether we are happy is not controlled by ourselves, but determined by other people's evaluation.
The starting point of doing things is to consider other people’s feelings, but we don’t ask ourselves what we really think in our hearts. We seem to forget to accept ourselves and get along with ourselves.
is trying hard to seek out, probably getting further and further away from the original intention and the relationship we are trying hard to maintain is not harmonious.
In fact, everyone's growth is carried out alone and no one can replace it. Learn, think, and act, which one does not require you to do it yourself?
Only by keeping loneliness can you see prosperity.
Alone is a kind of ability. Henry David Thoreau of " Walden " was more than 170 years ago, in the internal and external troubles, he was angry, anxious, confused, and could not find his way.
One day, he came to Walden and started a life of solitary life alone, away from people, and he had most of the time to spend with himself, which allowed him to gain purity in his heart.
Only those who have time to increase their spiritual wealth are those who truly enjoy comfort.
Return to the true nature and the soul. In the utopia you build, you will relieve your fatigue and your messy mood will be released.
Anxiety teaches you independence.
05 The only certainty is uncertainty
Carefully observe the cause of our anxiety, whether it all comes from destroying the plan and exceeding expectations.
For example, a task we have worked hard to complete has not been praised, and the bad emotions have reached the freezing point.
For example, the trip we planned was broken by the epidemic and had no choice but to be closed at home.
encounters a matter that violates the original plan, we will immediately feel bad, and this bad thing means that we cannot accept "uncertainty".
Life is full of all kinds of uncertainties and cannot progress as you ideally.
Live the life we want, we need to learn to coexist with uncertainty. The only way to coexist in uncertainty is roughly:
admits and accepts uncertainty is the only thing that is certain.
Do what makes you really feel alive and give up fighting against "uncertainty".
Anxiety allows you to learn to accept.
Finally, I want to say:
Anxiety does not mean there is no pain. In fact, the anxiety process may also bother your emotions.
Acknowledging the ordinary, accepting anxiety, and not denying it, and walking with it is a kind of courage and a kind of transcendence.
