Outside the window, rain pattered down. She looked at me with her eyes and said, "Let's meet the parents." I couldn't help but feel shocked. This was the first time she had said such words to me in such a long time. With tears in my eyes and a little choked, I tentatively asked, "Isn't it a little early?" ?" She was a little excited: "How dare you bargain! You haven't handed in your homework for two days!"
I went to a banquet with my mother today. Before I went, my mother taught me to be sweeter. If other people's children look normal, I will praise them for how beautiful they are. If they are really ugly, I will praise others for how tall they are. As a result, after dinner, many people have praised me for being tall.
html More than 0 years ago, I was eating ice cream in front of my house. A child in the distance swallowed his saliva while looking at my ice cream. I saw how pitiful he was and called him over. I gave him a stool and said, come, sit and watch... Many years later, we went on a blind date. In the woman’s family, she had a younger brother, and his younger brother asked me, “Do you want to marry my sister?” I nodded and was wondering what he meant. He pointed to the sofa behind and said: Come, sit and think.
On Monday, I got on the bus with nothing but the 1 yuan for the ride. Sitting from the starting station to the final station, I felt calm all the way. But when I got off the bus at the terminal, I found a note in my pants: "It's a shame for an adult to go out without taking any money with him. --"
On Tuesday, I carried a broken wallet with 1 cent in it. money. After arriving at the terminal, I found that the money was still there, and a note was stuffed in the wallet: "We are not beggars, please don't insult our profession. --"
On Wednesday, I still broke through my wallet and found 100 yuan in counterfeit money. money. After arriving at the terminal, I found that the money was still there, and a note was stuffed in the wallet: "It is illegal to hide fake copies of large denominations privately. Please consciously go to the relevant departments and hand them in. --"
On Thursday, I took an envelope , which contains a stack of expired Straits Talent News. After arriving at the terminal, I found that the envelope was still there. I took out the newspaper and took a look. The newspaper had been replaced by the latest Straits Talent News. I took a note with me: "This is the era of consultation. Only by updating information in a timely manner can we seize opportunities and win success." !-- ”
On Friday, I put a toy mobile phone in my pocket. After arriving at the terminal, the phone was still there, with an additional note: "Please don't make this joke and affect the normal work of our company. --"
On Saturday, I took a toy pistol and stuck it on my waist. After arriving at the terminal, I found that the gun was missing and a note was stuffed in the waistband of my trousers: "I hate you robbers the most. You have no technical skills at all! The crime tools are confiscated! --"
On Sunday, I was about to get on the bus, but There were too many people to squeeze in. While I was waiting for the next bus, I touched my pocket and found an extra 20 bucks and a note: "Brother, it's not easy for people in our line of work to be exposed to the sun and wind all day long. Here's my 20 bucks." , take a taxi wherever you want, please stop teasing us.'
My brother told my nephew to stop watching TV and do his homework quickly. He told me several times, but my nephew just ignored me. Sister-in-law: Didn't you hear me? Go quickly. The nephew listened to his sister-in-law and left the TV to do his homework. Brother: Your mother’s words are not as important as your mother’s. Brother: Of course, why is your mother? Does it have weight? Nephew: Mom is one hundred and eighty, and you are only one hundred and two. Who do you think has weight?
When I went shopping with my girlfriend, my girlfriend took a fancy to a 30 yuan bag and asked, "Can it be cheaper?" The boss disagreed and the girlfriend negotiated the price to 20, "I didn't bring much money when I went out for a walk, so it's just 20." "When the boss was about to agree, I added: "I still have money." My girlfriend snapped, turned around and left, so angry that she didn't even buy anything.Hehe, a slap of 20 yuan is quite worth it, I secretly said with joy!
My girlfriend was lying on the bed playing with her mobile phone, muttering something while playing. I was curious, so I leaned over to listen. I only heard my girlfriend muttering: "Grab things from the air! Come here! Give me that bottle of water in the refrigerator." Come here, come here!" I said funny: "Haha, you really think you have magical powers! You can't get through the water!" My girlfriend kicked me and said, "You're the only one who knows I can't catch things from a distance! Why don’t you go get me some water? ”
# funny moment## funny大奖##numberoneweekly#