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The relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law seems to be a big problem since ancient times.
How should mother-in-law and daughter-in-law get along?
Why are there conflicts between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law?
causes the conflicts between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law mainly from historical factors, psychological emotional factors and differences in ideological values.
First of all, it is related to our cultural background. Our country pays special attention to the family. After adulthood, the connection with the original family is very close, even living with parents. The mother-in-law and daughter-in-law belong to different eras or even different regions. People of different nationalities will also have differences in living habits, consumer opinions, and childbirth. At this time, it is easy to have differences in concepts.
From the perspective of emotional factors, the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is a special family relationship that is neither related to blood nor love. It is inherently lack of cohesion, and there is a difference in the sense of belonging, and the two sides will naturally form "equal love". In particular, they will have too high psychological expectations for each other, and the two sides will also be separated.
The conflicts between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law based on the above reasons seriously affect the personal physical and mental health, the harmony of the family, and even the survival of the marriage of two people. In a complete family, if the conflict between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is very serious, and there is no divorce between the husband and wife, then one party must endure tremendous psychological pressure, and even affect their health.
Why is there a big outbreak of conflicts between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law with children? With a new member in the
family, the relationship becomes more complicated. After having a child, the biggest problem facing her is the child's upbringing. The mother-in-law is also a mother, she will feel that she is experienced, and the daughter-in-law is a new mother, affected by hormones and inspired by the instinct to protect the child.
In addition, after having a child, many of them need the help of the mother-in-law, so when the child is born to 3 years old, he usually lives with the mother-in-law. The contradiction between the two due to their living habits will not be discussed. The key is that everyone lives together, the mother-in-law wants to be the master of the family, and the husband is busy at work, and the family trivial matters are not too much trouble. If there is a big conflict, the husband generally still Will unite with my mother, so that the wife will feel wronged. The mother-in-law will be more confident, and there will be more conflicts between the two. How does
establish a good mother-in-law relationship?
1. Cultivate empathy, empathize with your heart, and think in a different way.
Don't just start from your own standpoint, only see that you are right and the other party is wrong, try to find out the shortcomings of your own views and the other's views advantage. In fact, the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is a matter of sense of boundaries, and how to keep a good sense of scale is very important.
2. Manage the relationship first.
The relationship between husband and wife and the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law affect each other. Our common goal is to make marriages happier, families more harmonious, and life better.
3. Communicate more with mother-in-law
Women and women can always find common topics. You can talk about the small conflicts that happened before, or talk about the men in the family. Through communication, the two people can become closer. The mother-in-law is an elder, and more often it is necessary for the daughter-in-law to take the initiative to find the mother-in-law and take the initiative to manage this relationship. The mother-in-law sees your attitude and thinks that she is very happy. Communication can ease the relationship a lot.
Source: Jiaxing Transportation Economy Broadcasting Comprehensive One Psychology
Picture Source: Network
Editor: Yun Lei
