got married, my husband and I changed the bank card password to the same one, but we always use our own money, but when I checked the Double Eleven bill yesterday, I found that I had an extra sum of money in October. Wan’s consumption record, the consumer organization is a medical beauty hospital... After
found out, my first reaction was to ask my husband. My husband was still at a loss at first. When I showed him the bill, his face changed. At first, he didn’t want to say it. He confided the truth after I repeatedly asked. It turned out that my husband secretly raised a woman with me behind his back. When paying the medical beauty fee for that woman last month, he didn’t notice the payment. The bank card belongs to me, which reveals the stuff.
After knowing the truth, I wanted to be as uncomfortable as being stabbed by a knife, but because I didn’t want to show my timidity, I still kept calm on the face. I just told my husband to let me think about it first, but after closing the door, I buried my head. When I went to the quilt, I wailed and wept. I don't know why this happened in my marriage. Obviously, our relationship has always been very good.
During the five years of our marriage, I did not speak some sweet words at his request and sent out all kinds of affectionate friends. I took care of all the other things outside the house very well, and we also There is a three-year-old baby. I am really confused and helpless. I really don’t understand why he would do such a thing. Teacher Xu Chuan, I just want to run away now, but thinking of young children, I I can’t rest assured, how can I save my marriage?
Xu Chuan: Ms.
, hello!
I understand your feelings very well. Since you got married, although you haven't acted too much, you have always loved your husband deeply, so after being betrayed, you will collapse like this and cry. Why
husband betrayed the family? This thinking is often after discovering her husband stealing food, because according to our memory, we have always felt that marriage is very happy. Where can we think of the reason for a man's betrayal? That's why we are so confused and helpless. Of course, the husband's betrayal of the family must have his own problems. But it is undeniable that since the man betrayed the family, it means that he is not satisfied with the current marriage, and our side is completely unaware of it, which also proves that we do not have a correct understanding of the marital status. In fact, no matter how well we take care of home and outside the home, men may steal food. Whether a man will betray the family is mainly determined by the joint efforts of three aspects:
One is the issue of the marital ability of both spouses, that is, can we personally recognize our current marital status, and whether we can correctly handle conflicts in marriage. And whether we are satisfied with the quality of the current marriage;
second is whether the couple has a benign interaction in this marriage, whether your marriage for so many years is growing in a better direction, and whether your marriage has enough energy to go Facing some internal contradictions and external shocks;
third is whether the woman outside takes the initiative in this relationship with men, whether it is enough to shake the position of marriage in the minds of men, and whether she is not afraid of becoming a morally tainted woman . After clarifying these three aspects, we will not be so confused about the betrayal of our husband.
In addition, from your words, it is not difficult to see that you are a typical avoidant attachment personality, so we will choose not to do it when the lover asks to hear a few sweet words and show affection; so we will find that the husband betrayed After that, he would force himself to maintain the calmness on his face, unable to confess his despair and helplessness to his lover, and just want to escape far. Of course, we can't blame us. After all, we have such behaviors and thoughts. It is also because the intensity of external conflicts exceeds our psychological tolerance. This is why we have strong anxiety and the urge to avoid or even run away.
Since we still want to save the marriage, we need to sort out the marriage problem, open our hearts to tell your lover how you feel in the marriage, if you don’t know what to do, I’ll guide you to your confusion , To take you out of the emotional dilemma, so that you are no longer alone and helpless!
