When most people who are facing a breakup decide to recover, their biggest worry is not to find a way to recover, but to worry about missing the best time to recover.
I have seen many girls who were afraid of wolves and tigers when they were recovering. In the end, I wasted time on fear and fear, and missed the best time to recover. The inertia of love between the two parties faded, leading to the later period. Need to spend more energy to do emotional awakening.
In order to save everyone's recovery, I want to let everyone know how to seize the golden period of break-up recovery to shorten the recovery time.
The four golden periods in redemption
01, Exclusion period-about 1 week after breaking up
The rejection period, as the name suggests, means that the other party is wary of you and does not want to contact you.
At the beginning of the breakup, the party who proposed the breakup felt absolute freedom, and finally did not need to be imprisoned by love. It was a state of liberation.
If you are entangled with each other hard at this time, you are asking yourself boring.
is like a child who wants to sneak out and play, and you are always watching his every move, the child will definitely feel uncomfortable and tire of your existence, the same is true for adults.
Stalking is a taboo in the rejection period. Phone bombing and seeking peace, and constantly lowering one's posture, these are invalid behaviors during the rejection period, and the other party cannot feel your thoughts. To review the heart.
In some cases, in order to leave a way for yourself, avoid constant quarrels between two people, and continue to kill the relationship, you can actually make a concession to ease the relationship between the two people.
Back to their lives, don’t bother even if you miss them again.
Your degree of entanglement is directly proportional to the degree of his rejection of you. The more you are entangled, the more he repels.
02、 Cooling-off period-1-2 weeks after the breakup
If you are not entangled at the beginning of the breakup, you will enter the cooling-off period around 1-2 weeks .
During this period of time, the opponent's rejection of you is slowly weakening, and with the passage of time, the intense emotions will also fade.
After a period of empty window, after some calm thinking, he will realize that your previous problems are not as serious as they thought, and even miss the previous time a bit, and the old scenes inadvertently appear in his mind.
But even so, you can't take the initiative to initiate a recovery right away, you need to take the opportunity to expand this thought.
We have been emphasizing the necessity of disconnection after breaking up, but disconnection does not mean that the connection is completely broken, but that the direct connection is broken. The indirect connection still needs to be maintained, and even more thoughts are needed To maintain.
Use the circle of friends to output more positive energy status.
Regardless of work or life, try to improve yourself and let the other person's attention focus on you again.
03、Recurring period-1 month after the breakup
When the peak of the emotional period has passed, the two parties enter a short emotional dormancy period. Do not rush to restore pressure on the other side.
Because of the influence of emotional inertia, the other party will usually increase social activities or find entertainment in a short time to disperse and offset their negative emotions, but this release will have a short-term effect, but it can only last for a short time time.
After venting the depressed emotions during getting along, you will enter self-reflection.Isn’t it okay to just break up with a long-time lover?
At this time, it is easy to enter a period of repetition, and the idea of wanting to reconcile but is afraid of being rejected and losing face.
During the period of repetition, the other party's willingness to break up may be shaken. What needs to be done is to constantly rationalize the previous contradictions, explain and resolve the previous problems as much as possible, and rationalize the problems to make him feel There is actually no big problem between you, and then hide the sense of need and wait for the composite window.
During this period, it is necessary to grasp the degree of contact, not to cater to too fiercely, nor to disconnect too hard, through high-frequency circle of friends interaction to seize the composite window released by the other party during this period.
The chances of recovery are still very high if it is operated properly.
04、 Salvation period-more than one month after the breakup
has experienced the first three periods. At this stage, the opponent’s defense is the lowest, his heart In a wavering stage.
At this time, if you attack again, it is very likely that you will hit his heart directly and have unexpected results.
If you still have contact information, you might as well ask about the other person's current situation, it can be life or work, but don't reveal your purpose, it's not appropriate to go straight to emotional topics.
In the process of communication, we must show the contrast with the previous one to form a contrast.
If you were clingy, you should now be independent, not dependent.
To create a kind for the other party, you change from the bottom of your heart, not change for the sake of change. It is not easy to change completely, only your subjective consciousness is strong enough to drive your actions.
This is an experience that emphasizes process and neglects results. Self-transformation is your way of retreat. Even if you fail to recover, no matter how bad you are, you will figure out how to get along with intimacy. The correct concept of love and communication will be Your love life will be much better in the future.
Thinking about it this way, the recovery mentality will naturally be set, and the mentality will be your biggest bargaining chip to reverse the situation.
Recovering during these golden periods is like pushing a boat along the river, but once you do the wrong thing at the wrong time, recovering becomes a sailing boat against the current.
Make the right judgment at the right time, and make the right response, so that you can save yourself more with less.
If you also have emotional problems, you can follow me to chat in private messages.
