Someone said:
"It's just like this when you get married. It's a circle game where problems keep appearing and problems are constantly solved."
At first glance, it's true. Marriage seems very simple, but it's just a combination and running-in.
It is easy to fall in love and difficult to get along with each other. Various contradictions will arise when we get along day and night. Some people are difficult to resist, and some people are calmly dealing with.
Living a good life is not a simple sentence. Wisdom and reason need to coexist in order to create a taste of happiness.
If a woman wants to have a good marriage, she must abandon worldly concepts and sort out her attitude towards marriage.
In real life, a truly powerful woman treats marriage only 9 words: not serious, not weak, and not complain.
TV series " Snail House " has a classic scene, which is impressive.
Haiping and her husband Su Chun went to the supermarket to buy groceries. Due to a malfunction of the storage equipment, Su Chun was unable to get the dollar he placed when the storage was stored.
Haiping scolded Su Chun all the way because of this incident. She ignored Su Chun's explanation and insisted on forcing Su Chun to go to the supermarket to find someone to get the money back.
Su Chun said helplessly: "Isn't it just one dollar? It has been lost now, you won't let me die!"
Haiping refused to give in and continued to launch a personal attack on Su Chun: "You make a few dollars in your life, what contributions do you have to this family..."
Su Chun, who was originally gentle and down-to-earth, was forced to leave anger and said, "Don't you just want to divorce? I agree." Then he slammed the door and left.
Haiping seemed to be crazy about poverty, but in fact she was too serious and kept trying to leave the matter, and finally forced her husband away.
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Netizens are very clean and tidy up their homes, but their husbands often go home and throw stinky socks around.
They had arguing about this for many times, but once they almost started to fight, but fortunately my best friend knocked on the door and interrupted them.
Netizens kept complaining to their best friend, and their best friend said in confusion: "I have seen him quietly take his socks to the bathroom several times. Have you never seen them before? Or do you just remember when he didn't put them?"
Netizens woke up as if they were in a dream, and suddenly realized that the number of times her husband threw socks was indeed getting less and less, but he turned a blind eye.
Later, netizens rarely took this matter seriously. Her husband occasionally forgot, so she silently took the bathroom for her husband.
Gradually, the husband not only consciously changed his bad habits, but they also rarely quarrel and their relationship is getting better and better.
Lin Yutang in " Life is just like this " wrote:
The most important thing for us is not to care about truth and falsehood, gain and loss, fame and fortune, noble and humble, poverty and wealth, but how to live happily and discover the poetry of life from it.
Marriage is not a battlefield, what is important is not right or wrong, but harmony and comfort.
No matter how perfect a person is, he will make mistakes in a daze; no matter how good a partner is, he will have some unsatisfactory points.
As long as it is not a major issue of principle, you don’t have to be too serious. If the string is tight, it will break, and if the person is forced to be crazy.
Don’t stick to temporary delusions and destroy a lifetime of marriage because of your willfulness.
After watching an interview, lawyer Jiang Yanjie shared a marriage dispute case he handled.
The wife took care of the family full-time after marriage. In order to help her husband work with peace of mind, she basically did not let her husband worry about the affairs at home.
The wife knows very little about her husband's company and income. Sometimes when she asks her husband, she only says, "Just give you enough money to spend. Why do you care about that much?"
The wife is extremely unconfident because she doesn't work all year round and she stops asking.
Five years later, the husband's company plans to go public, and the wife happily cooperates with the relevant procedures.
But when the company went public successfully, her husband handed her a divorce lawsuit.
It turned out that the husband took advantage of the company's listing and tricked his wife into signing a property distribution agreement.
The husband only leaves his wife with a house and completely separates the relationship between his wife and the company's assets.
The wife felt like she was thundering and told her many years of hard work, but her husband said ruthlessly:
"I worked hard for so many years, what contributions have you made here? It would be nice to give you a house."
The wife obviously gave everything for her family, but in the eyes of her husband, this is the tragedy of being at a disadvantage in marriage.
I always remember what lawyer Jiang Yanjie said in his summary:
"Family life cannot determine status by economic income, and women must not lose the bottom line of marriage safety."
You dare not speak out your value for it, and others will not pay attention to your existence and dedication.
The essence of marriage is a transaction. Whether it is an emotional transaction or a value transaction, you must be treated equally.
Just like in Jane Eyre, it says:
"Love is a game, you must always be incompatible with the other party and be evenly matched in order to be able to rely on each other for a long time. Because too strong opponents make people tired, and too weak opponents make people tired."
Weakness in marriage will fall into a passive, and passive means: even if you are beaten, you will have no power to fight back.
Women don’t have to force others, but they can’t be bullied at the disadvantage and let their husbands be allowed to do so.
You must take the initiative to affirm your own value, defend your rights, and improve your ability to correct your marriage.
The best marriage attitude in the new era is:
You treat each other sincerely, I am complacent and happy; if you leave me, I am not afraid.
There is such a couple in the book "Intimate Relationship".
One day, my wife was shocked to see the high electricity bill, so she asked her husband to discuss it, but the two started arguing without saying a few words.
The wife complained that the electricity bill was too high and she had no money to go on vacation. Her husband said that she worked overtime all day and was already working hard to make money.
mentioned overtime, and the wife complained that her husband worked too much overtime and that the two rarely stayed alone with time.
The wife kept complaining about old accounts, and many topics had nothing to do with electricity bills. As a result, the two of them became more and more fierce.
Complaints are worthless negative emotions, which not only cannot end problems, but also affect the relationship between husband and wife.
There are always bumps and bumps in every marriage. The difference is that some become worse by complaining, while others become better by sympathy.
Crosstalk actor Yu Qian Pampering his wife Bai Huiming is famous in the circle, and some people say that Bai Hui will be born in a good life tomorrow.
But many people don’t know that Bai Huiming has been “possessing” Yu Qian for many years.
Bai Huiming has been from a wealthy family since childhood and has no worries about food and clothing. After marrying Yu Qian, Yu Qian had nothing.
Yu Qian has had a very small income for two years, and he even relied on Bai Huiming's monthly salary to support his life.
Faced with such a big gap, Bai Huiming never complained. She changed her habit of spending money and was careful to calculate every expense.
Yu Qian sometimes has a lot of work pressure and is in a bad mood and loses his temper. Bai Huiming does not fight back and makes noise. Instead, he comforts Yu Qian with whispers: "Don't worry, take your time.""
Later, their conditions improved. Yu Qian became obsessed with raising horses and stayed in the horse farm for nothing, which consumed a lot of money and energy.
If it were other partners, opposition and complaint would definitely be indispensable. Bai Huiming said to Qian:
"If raising horses can make you happy, why not? "
Perhaps it is Bai Huiming's understanding and tolerance that has made Yu Qian's love for her remain unfading for twenty years.
"The World Not Complaint" has a saying:
Complaints never attract or bring what you want; on the contrary, complaining will make you never get rid of what you don't want.
Happiness will not breed in complaining, but will only be destroyed in complaining.
The relationship between husband and wife is as if to be released The flowers grow towards the sun, wither on the shady back.
Too much complaint will only push your partner farther and farther away, making life cloudy.
Smart women often have more positive energy, are not afraid of the cold, wind and frost, are happy in time, and are stable in daily life.
Someone said:
"Love is romantic, marriage is realistic, when the firewood, rice, oil and salt in reality replaces the moon before and after the flowers, when all kinds of tenderness are integrated into the fragments of daily life, when everything returns to ordinary, we must face the truth in life together. "
Marriage does not have so much passion and romance, but more trivial and dull.
However, the more ordinary the days are, the more wisdom and strength are needed to deal with it.
Especially women, one hand must stabilize their work and the other hand must hold their life tightly, and deal with too much and too much.
Life is not an easy task, happiness does not depend on luck, only If you practice hard, you can keep your safety and smooth.
If you choose marriage, you should manage it well. Don’t be arrogant, don’t be humble, don’t be arrogant, don’t complain or hate. The breeze will blow to you.
wish all marriages shine in the ordinary years, and have a fragrance in one journey.
At the same time, you would rather that every woman can maintain a rational and restrained marriage, give priority to living as her own light, and then support the yang of others.
