Marriage is a two-way journey. If one party loses enthusiasm, it will be a matter of time before the relationship has problems. This is how Ms. Liu, who lives in 2 Zhoukou , was. She and her husband Lao Yu met her on a blind date. They didn't have long been in love and got married.
After marriage, my husband went out to work. He had the skills of electric welding and his income was quite stable.
Ms. Liu works in the county town. After work, she misses her husband very much. She repeatedly proposes to work together, even if the income is a little less, at least the two can rely on each other.
Lao Yu refused, saying that he would work hard while he was young and earn more money, and his quality of life would be much better in the future.
The two have been married for 5 years, rarely live together, and have never had children. Although their parents-in-law didn't say anything in person, they often expressed their desire to hold their grandchildren behind their backs.
Ms. Liu felt that this was not a solution, so she went to the place where her husband worked and rented a room, hoping that the couple would have a more harmonious relationship. What she didn't expect was that her husband would rather live in the collective dormitory than enter her room.
She realized there was a problem and asked her husband if he had changed his mind.
The husband refused and said that he would never be fickle. This is strange. Does he have any hidden secrets?
Considering that men want face, Ms. Liu quietly bought some ingredients , hoping that her husband would be gentler to her after increasing her nutrition, but there was no effect at all. Her husband would rather hold his mobile phone to play games, and would not say anything to her.
Ms. Liu was angry. She filed for divorce. She felt that her husband didn't love her, so it was better to separate as soon as possible. She got married not to be a free nanny, but to hope to get love.
The husband did not understand this, and he in turn accused his wife of having too many thoughts and must have fallen in love with others, otherwise why would he not live a peaceful life?
The couple's incident has aroused discussion among netizens.
There is a comment that says it well: " is good for both parties if they are divorced. If they marry a wife, they don't need to get an marriage certificate. Even if they have no feelings for each other, why do they need to be tied together?"
Yes, they obviously don't have much feelings, they just start a family for the sake of getting married. The love Ms. Liu wants is not given to her husband, so it will be difficult to maintain.
Platonic love
In life, sexless marriage is not an isolated case.
When Tsai Qin was 27 years old, she met director Yang Dechang because of acting.
After the two were together, Yang Dechang made a request, that is, to maintain a sexless marriage.
Yang Dechang said: " True love should maintain platonic communication, and do not let our feelings be mixed with any impurities. You should focus on your work to avoid being bound by some so-called emotions. ."
Tsai Qin loves him very much. She didn't want to go against the other party's wishes, so she chose to agree.
The two have been together for ten years. Cai Qin thought she had gained a platonic love. What is ridiculous is that the other party betrayed his emotional relationship and there is a child.
For a long time, Cai Qin couldn't get out. She felt very wronged. She clearly agreed to maintain the Platonic love, why did the other party change his heart.
In fact, when couples are together, how can they not communicate in depth, their relationship will fall apart one day.
Love someone will feel the heartbeat . If you see that the other person can be as calm as water, then you may really have no love in your heart.
A data survey showed that sexless marriages among Chinese couples reached 25%. Many people tried to find the answer and searched online for "how to relieve the sense of alienation in relationships", but there was no way to solve the problem.
In fact, the answer is not outside, but for two people, you must first put the other person in your heart so that you can have emotional fluctuations due to some trivial matters. cares about the other person is a prerequisite for love.
The embarrassment of a couple with children
There is also a kind of emotional change, after the wife gave birth to a child.
In order to raise children, some women will focus most of their energy on their children. They are worried that their children’s crying at night will affect their husband’s work, so they let their husbands go to the study to sleep.
Over time, the relationship between the two will gradually fade, but if a person is used to falling asleep alone, he is reluctant to return to his wife and children.
Liu Fang is like this. After giving birth to Xiaobao, she felt that her health was not as good as before. Some trivial things would also affect her emotions. In order not to affect the relationship between husband and wife, she proposed to divide the room.
At the beginning, my husband was not very willing and felt that he was neglected. After a while, he was very happy to be in such a single place. After dinner, he would go back to the room. Through the door, he could hear his laughter.
Once Liu Fang thought it was strange and quietly pushed the door in. She found that her husband was chatting with someone. The other party was a woman. Although he explained that he was a customer, based on the woman's intuition, Liu Fang thought that things were not simple.
She changed her attitude and asked her husband to move back to the master bedroom, but the other party was unwilling to do so, thinking it would be nice to sleep separately.
When people reach middle age, many people will focus on their work and children, thinking that their marriage has been stable, but they do not know that your negligence will also cause a crisis in their relationship.
In psychology, a person's external reaction reflects inner changes . If a person loves you, he will reflect his concern for you in his words and deeds. On the contrary, even if he is separated for a month, he may not make a phone call.
If the two become speechless, it is a signal that the marriage is showing a red light. You need to take the pulse of the marriage.
. Check yourself.
Is it because I am too busy with work and ignore my attention to my partner?
Some people don’t pay attention to dressing up after get off work, and often walk around the house in pajamas, and even when going to the toilet, they don’t close the door. They think they are a family and don’t care about privacy.
In fact, this idea is wrong. love needs a little mystery . To win the other party’s attention, you need to keep a little distance from the other party appropriately so that you can have a full image when you appear in front of the other party.
. Listen to each other.
Changes in relationships are definitely not a day.
Many problems have already laid the groundwork in the accumulated trivialities. Good couples know how to listen and will take an hour every day to talk about what they encounter, so that both parties can resolve misunderstandings and enhance their relationship.
3. Release life pressure.
Everyone has their own pressure, but the tolerance is different.
There is a "door opening theory ", which means that no matter what problems you encounter outside, before opening the door, you must learn to put your worries outside the door and walk into the door with a calm heart. It would be even better if you can give your family a smile.
A good marriage is a two-way journey.
Only when both parties love each other and care about each other's feelings can the relationship be kept fresh for a long time.
If the other party doesn’t care about you at all, always find excuses to alienate you and eliminate physical problems, it means that the other party doesn’t love you at all. When
encounters this situation, stops the loss in time, which is also a kind of wisdom.
There is no need to waste our youth for the wrong person. Since the other person does not love you, stay away from the other person. Only in this way can we carefully examine ourselves and what kind of feelings we really want.
This incident also reminds us of this. Pre-marital examination is very necessary and can help you filter out some unnecessary troubles. Two people truly love each other and are willing to treat each other honestly.
