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A few days ago, a pair of friends around us who walked from campus to marriage divorced, which made us all feel very moved.
Since college, they have been golden boys and jade girls. Everyone thinks this is a good marriage given by heaven, and they also think they will continue to walk on.
But unexpectedly, after ten years of marriage, they chose to separate and have no mistresses, etc., but it just made the real life polish their relationship. The ending of
was unexpected by everyone, and even the parties involved felt extremely regretful. But life is like this, always giving us some critical strikes, making us unable to fight back.
And in this way, what we can do may be summarizing experience and working hard to manage our lives well, and not letting ourselves fall into the abyss.
Just like when I was watching " thirty only ", I was also sad for Gu Jia , thinking that she was so good, why couldn't I get the happiness she wanted.
I cursed Xu Huanshan and Lin Youyou, and also stood up for Gu Jia, but later I realized that if a woman wants to be happy, she really has to rely on herself.
Try to make yourself better, adjust your mentality, and learn to manage your feelings, so that you can get the happiness you want.
As for how to achieve happiness, I think everyone should learn the principle of three nos from Gu Jia, let themselves become their armor and backing, and let their feelings develop in a controllable and happy direction. We can definitely do it.
Don’t focus on your husband and children
When watching "Thirty Only", many women envied Gu Jia because she has the appearance and ability, and lived the envy of all women.
But, there is something that Gu Jia doesn't deserve our learning, that is, she loves her husband and children too much, and always focuses on them. Although she has not lost herself, she has also hurt herself.
For women, giving for their family is a beautiful thing, but this kind of effort must be moderate. You must know what the other party wants and give appropriately, otherwise it will have a counterproductive effect.
Just like Gu Jia, she wants to give her children a better education and help her husband have a better career, but not only does not make them happy, but has brought many hardships to the family.
Although this is not Gu Jia’s fault, we should also understand from this matter that women should never focus on their husbands and children, and focus more energy on themselves, so that you may be able to manage your relationship well.
Fortunately, Gu Jia is not the kind of woman who completely gives up on herself for her husband and children. She still has her own career and a clear mind, which helps her to quickly stand up after being hurt and continue to manage her life well.
So I hope all women can understand that women must have their own pace of life and love themselves more so that they can firmly control happiness and become the heroine of their own life.
Don’t give up getting better
Women, you must not give up on yourself because of marriage and become a yellow-faced woman, don’t pay attention to dressing and maintenance, and make yourself sloppy.
Because a woman’s appearance, temperament, etc. are our dignity. It is not about trying to please anyone, but about giving yourself a spirit.
is like Gu Jia. Even if she is at home full time, she will pay attention to maintenance and exercise every day to make herself exquisite and moving. There is no need to say about her ability. Although she did not go to the company, she also caught everything in the company. Everyone is used to relying on her when encountering any problems. This is her ability.
It is because of this that Gu Jia was able to stop the loss in time after Xu Huanshan betrayed him, and he had the confidence to leave the house in vain, so that he could start a new life quickly.
Looking at her, we should understand the meaning of women's efforts, which is to give ourselves the ability to love what we love and hate what we hate, and also to give ourselves more freedom to choose.
I hope all women can work hard for themselves like Gu Jia, because no one knows what kind of people and things they will meet in this life. Even if you are excellent Gu Jia, you may be betrayed, let alone ordinary us?
So, making ourselves better, stronger and better is our confidence to protect happiness, and it is also the courage to hold our heads up no matter what we encounter.
Don’t try to change the other party
Every time I write "Thirty Only" and Gu Jia, male readers leave messages below saying that Gu Jia is really too strong, and if his wife is like this, she will not be able to stand it.
At first I was quite annoyed that these men were making excuses for cheating, but later I calmed down and thought about it. The failure of each relationship was not a problem for one person. Although Xu Huanshan was not a human being, Gu Jia did have problems.
She always hopes to make her family better, give her children a better education, and give her husband a safer future, but she didn't think about whether these are what they need.
, especially Xu Huanshan, is actually a man who doesn’t have much ability, especially no responsibility or responsibility, so he doesn’t want to start a company at all, nor does he want to become bigger and stronger, he just wants to live with his own ideals.
Gu Jia has been trying to change him over the years. Although his original intention was good, it eventually became an opportunity for Xu Huanshan to betray and hurt himself.
So, women must not always want to change each other. You can understand each other and find a way to change that suits each other, and make life better together, instead of just being alone and making the other person feel very stressed.
I hope all women can learn from Gu Jia, work hard to make their marriage better, or compromise and make concessions appropriately, but no matter what, they find a way that suits each other, so that everyone can be comfortable, and only then can they be happy.
I never think that the failure of a marriage is the failure of a woman’s life. For women, marriage is only a part of life, and marriage also requires a little fate and luck in addition to managing it.
is like Gu Jia. She is so good, so outstanding, and so hardworking, but in the end she is still hurt by the scumbag? This really cannot be said to be her fault, but we can still learn from her some experiences and lessons to make ourselves better and make happiness more stable.
So, I hope all women can understand the three principles of women when managing their relationships from Gu Jia’s experience. Don’t be family-centered, don’t give up on yourself, don’t always want to change others.
Then, love yourself, work hard, and manage your life well. Only in this way can you be truly down-to-earth and so happiness be truly safe.
I believe that every smart woman can control her own happiness. Come on, you can definitely do it.
I am Xiyan, a columnist, an older girl who is neither old nor old. She likes to write warm words and do emotional programs. She has published "The Rest of Your Life is About Me". If you have a story, remember to come to me.
