In any relationship, you should understand a hidden rule:
actively seeks you because you care about you;
never actively seeks you because you have not had that high weight in his heart.
has a reader message.
She said that there is a boy who has been chatting with her recently, and he is very proactive every time, caring about her attitude, and constantly providing her with emotional value.
She could clearly feel that the boy's attitude towards her was ambiguous, but the boy had not confessed for a long time; this "unclear" state made her enjoy and nervous.
Have you ever had a similar experience?
There is such a person who will take the initiative to chat with you every time; what does the other person's initiative mean?
1. People who take the initiative every time really "cares about you"
There is a sentence in " Little Prince ":
"You come at four o'clock in the afternoon, so I have already felt happiness from three o'clock."
People who really care about you will subconsciously pay attention to everything related to you.
Your social dynamics, your life, your emotions and state will be recorded and cared about by him at all times.
When you get along, if he takes the initiative to look for you every time, it can basically explain a problem.
In his eyes, you are different from others.
Psychologically believes that:
The more people like something, the more they can’t help but want to get close.
"Sense of Distance" is an important measure for judging your relationship.
The more you trust you, rely on you, and care about you, the less you will mind the distance between you and him.
Even if you break into his life and his feelings, he will willingly accept it.
If you chat, every time he takes the initiative to provoke the topic, actively expresses kindness to you, and actively expresses his emotions to you.
This is already his very blunt hint: he has a good impression of you.
Only those who really care about you will pay attention to you at all times and want to have more communication with you.
There is a "self-exposed effect" in psychology.
The more you expose yourself in front of you, the more he trusts you.
Whether it is social or the relationship between the opposite sex, this is true.
2. People with high self-esteem are more willing to "take the initiative" in social interactions. All behaviors of
must be based on "motivation".
Only when you have a motivation will people make corresponding actions.
Psychology divides people's self-esteem into "high self-esteem" and "low self-esteem".
High self-esteem means:
Self-confidence, willing to express yourself, do not care about the opinions of the outside world, have strong opinions in the face of most things, and like to take the initiative.
Low self-esteem is:
lack of opinion, timid, hesitant, and indecisive.
Even if you meet someone you like, people with low self-esteem will not dare to confess easily.
In these two states:
If the other party likes you and he is a person with high self-esteem, then he will take the initiative to pursue you and establish a closer emotional connection with you.
The other party likes you, but he is a "low self-esteem" person, so he will stop taking the initiative and never even take the initiative to look for you.
Because the more he likes you, the more inferior he feels will be.
3. Active people need to "feed back" the most.
There is a question on Zhihu:
"Why did the other party give up halfway through me?"
One of the answerers said this:
"Maybe in your eyes, the other party is pursuing halfway through; but in the eyes of the other party, they can never see the progress bar." If any relationship cannot see the progress bar, the person's patience will also decrease accordingly.
When he is with you, he is very proactive and attentive every time; at this time, you should give him corresponding feedback.
If he can't feel any feedback in you, then he will gradually withdraw his investment in you.
From the perspective of love:
If you like it, go with the other person; when he runs towards you, you also remember to walk to him for a while.
From a rational point of view:
doesn’t like the other person, so decisively draw a line so that the other person can feel your principles and answers.
In your chat, if the other party always takes the initiative, it means:
He cares about you very much, at least treats you as a trustworthy friend;
He likes you very much, tests a little bit and gets close to you.
When facing other people's initiative, we should give the other party enough respect; after understanding, we will decide whether to continue chatting with the other party.
In any relationship, the active person is the most tormented; because he has to wait for the other party's response, just as tormented when he is waiting for the trial.
Today's topic:
Have you ever met someone who "takes the initiative" towards you?
(Article pictures are from the Internet)
