text/Ye Feifei yff
picture/From the Internet
I am Ye Feifei yff, a non-famous emotional instructor, who writes heart-wrenching emotional texts, hoping to bring you some spiritual comfort with warm words.
01
There is a saying in "Late Marriage": "I never want to be single, but I have a premonition of late marriage. I am waiting for the only soul that fits in the world."
Maybe, this is the voice of many older single women. They don't want to get married for the sake of getting married. They must find a man with tacit understanding of the soul and long for a beautiful love.
Based on this mentality, they don’t want to take a look at ordinary men at all. Even if they are over the age of marriage, they don’t want to get married.
Moreover, many older leftover women squandered their youth and love when they were young, but they never really recognized themselves. They didn’t know what the love and marriage they wanted would look like.
They always say they want to marry love, they always say they want to find a partner with their souls. They spent most of their lives, but they still gain nothing, but they never know how to reflect on themselves.
I never agree with women getting married blindly, but I don’t want women to choose to be single rashly when they can’t see the reality clearly. After all, the years of self-admiration for women are really not long and they can’t afford to delay.
As we grow older, older single women gradually lose their strength . No matter how high-quality it is, it is difficult to get the favor of men again. This is an indisputable fact.
My friend Xiaoyi is 36 years old, graduated from undergraduate, has a decent job, a monthly salary of over 10,000 yuan, and has a very high quality of life. Before
, she had been in love several times, but they all broke up due to realistic reasons and was single since then.
In her opinion, the biggest prerequisite for men and women to get married is to have a feeling of love, and it is best to achieve a tacit understanding in the soul.
Therefore, she made it clear that a man’s monthly salary is only 10,000, but both parties must have feelings, tacit understanding of each other, and this combination can be more harmonious and happy.
She has also been on blind dates many times, but the conditions for choosing a spouse have not changed. If she had no feelings for a man during blind dates, she would definitely not have dated.
I thought she would wait for the right man, but when she was 36 years old, she couldn't wait, and she was very confused.
Especially during blind dates, men always stare at her age and childbirth conditions, accuse and ridicule her everywhere, and do not look at her other advantages at all, which makes her feel very wronged.
Her education, appearance, work, social ability, social experience, and her own connotation are almost ignored by men.
After dozens of failed blind dates, she felt particularly wronged and cried: I just want to find a man with a tacit understanding of the soul. Are you wrong?
02
02
In "The Winner is King", there is a woman named Sheng Ruxi. She has outstanding appearance and strong abilities. She lives a very exquisite life in both work and life.
However, she is still single after thirty years old. It’s not that she can’t get married, but that she has always wanted to find a man who is moved by each other and has a tacit understanding of each other.
For this reason, she also suffered too much grievances. The people around her advised her not to be persistent. The family urged her to get married, especially her mother's painstaking efforts. She hoped that she would find a suitable partner for marriage.
At first, she didn't understand and thought it was too painful to give up her principles and marry someone she didn't love. She believes that although some men are suitable for marriage, they have no love and lack tacit understanding, how can they be happy?
It was not until her mother suffered from Alzheimer's disease that she slowly woke up. Perhaps what her mother said was the truth.
It was at this moment that she met a boy who was ten years younger than her. Suddenly, she felt that it was only after love that years of persistence had been shaken.
However, Sheng Ruxi waited for love, and the older leftover women in reality may not be able to wait. If they do not recognize themselves, recognize reality, and persist blindly, they may delay themselves.
" Tokyo Women's Picture Book ", there is also a woman who wants to be beautiful, have a figure and have a body, and have ability and ability. The only thing that doesn't is love.
However, she didn't believe it, thinking that she was so high-quality. Although she was over 30 years old, she could find a high-quality man.
So, she began to work hard for her career, hoping that she would become better and better. When she had enough strength, she could choose the person she wanted.
However, reality quickly slapped her in the face. When she became an older single woman, wearing expensive famous brands, she found that she was ignored.
Moreover, she was ridiculed by others and she didn't even have the chance to be selected by men, because those men did not care about her high-quality conditions, but valued her age and childbirth, which seemed particularly ironic.
At this time, she realized that the love she had always insisted on was too ethereal and finally paid the price for her original conceit.
So, older leftover women, don’t blindly stick to the so-called tacit understanding of the soul. How can there be perfect love in this world?
Love and marriage require certain compromises. If you can’t see this reality clearly and be too persistent, the final outcome may be very desolate.
03
Yishu said: "Marriage has nothing to do with love. People always think that after a relationship matures, they will get married naturally, but they don't know that marriage is just a way of life. Everyone can get married, which is very simple. And love is a completely different thing."
In fact, love tends to be perfect, while marriage needs to face reality. There are essential differences between the two.
A person may get married anytime, anywhere, but he may not be able to find love anytime, anywhere, because beautiful love is never found.
Many older single women want to find a beautiful love and hope to meet a man with a tacit understanding of the soul, but how much is this probability?
is not to let women get married, but to hope that women can see the reality clearly and not be blindly persistent.
In fact, getting married is not a difficult task. Just think it’s appropriate for two people, but love is impossible. If you lack the feeling of love, you will never be able to get together.
It can be seen from this that pursuing perfect love cannot be successful easily, and it is even more impossible to require tacit understanding in the soul.
Two people are together, and more or less need to make concessions, and one party must compromise.
Ye Feifei yff emotional message:
I think older single women should not blindly stick to their requirements for choosing a spouse. They should make some adjustments as the reality changes.
When you meet a relatively matched man and have some good feelings for each other, you can give both parties a chance.
If you don’t take a step forward, how do you know that two people are not suitable?
Many older single women have been hovering in the blind date market, but have never succeeded. They just blindly choose men and never know how to ask themselves what they really need?
This is not only apart from adding ridicule from others, but it will not help you in choosing a spouse, but will only delay yourself.
I hope that the older leftover women in reality can have some insights. When you fall into persistence, you might as well ask your heart:
You have been delaying most of your life in order to pursue the love that is tacit in the soul. Is it really worth it?
END
Author: Ye Feifei yff, focusing on creation and sharing in the field of emotions, communicating your and my heart with emotions, I hope you and I will know each other here. If you like it, please follow me.
