Born in the countryside in the 1970s, I lived a poor life when I was a child, and it was common for me to go hungry.
Although it is not full or warm to wear, it has its beauty in that era - pure! There is only the issue of food and clothing, and there are no secular distractions. Therefore, my childhood was generally happy.
Time flies, and the years are in love, and now I am forty-eight years old. I once had a happy family! It’s not a happy thing, but it’s not a warmth. However, all this has now become a painful memory!
My ex-wife has been married to me for thirteen years and actually put a cuckold on me for thirteen years. I was kept in the dark all the time. What I couldn't bear most is that none of the four children belong to me.
We save on food and food, and the three daughters and one son who work hard to earn money to raise are not my biological children! ! ! It's so ridiculous. It's here, but the clown is myself!
originally planned to raise the children as a child after suffering and suffering when they were young, and they would grow old in the future and could not do it anymore. They could enjoy the joy of the garden and the children and grandchildren surrounding their knees with my wife. However, I never expected that an appraisal book would stab directly into my heart like a sharp knife, constantly swaying, my heart was bleeding...
1974, in a small rural area in the remote mountainous area in northern Jiangxi, I was born. I was the last child of my parents, and there was a big brother and three sisters on it.
family of seven, relying on a few acres of thin land to make a living, making life very difficult and difficult. They also have to support their grandfather and grandmother. Life is difficult! During the slack season, my father would go to the town to do short-term work and earn a meager salary to pay for his family.
Fortunately, the five brothers and sisters are all very sensible and are competing to help with their work at home. As soon as my second sister and I finished school, we would go to the mountain to pick up firewood, cut pig grass , and hold sweet potato leaves...
After finishing the fifth grade of elementary school, my family really had no money to pay the tuition. That night, my father called me to the front with a serious expression. After pondering for a long time, he said to me: I can't afford to support you in school, please drop out of school, and learn woodwork with your elder brother.
But I love reading, and I don’t want to be uneducated in the future, so I begged my father to give me a chance, and then spent more than two months in the summer vacation to work in the town. I am not afraid of any tiring and hard work. I have done all the work of carrying stones, loading sand and making steel wires on the construction site, and then I barely earned the tuition fee for the next year.
Due to years of overdrawing, my parents' bodies have been very poor. One summer, in the dry season, in order to release water to the fields, my mother disappeared into the ink-like night with a hoe.
As a result, we fell from the ridge that day, and our heads hit the stones. We were unconscious for four days and four nights. We were at a loss and could only worry. Fortunately, our mother finally took it over, otherwise how would this family live!
My hometown, quiet and beautiful
Similarly, my father suffered from heavy physical labor and his lumbar vertebrae were very worn. Finally, in the winter of 1989, the wood fell down.
After the operation, my father was bedridden for a year. Losing his father's labor force will undoubtedly make this already poor family worse. That year was the most difficult year in our family. Only my mother was left to work, and she had not left her home and outside the house for a while, as if she had been aging for ten years!
Later, I finished junior high school. Every semester during the winter and summer vacations, I worked outside to earn tuition. This is the only way I can share the pressure for my family.
I chose to study in a vocational high school because I wanted to learn some skills, enter society early, work early to earn money, and shoulder the burden for my parents.
When I graduated from Vocational High School, I just turned 17 years old. Before I could enjoy the beauty of my youth, I chose to go to Shanghai with my classmates and be a dishman in a big hotel.
monthly salary is only 700 yuan, and I can only buy food but not accommodate housing. This forced my classmates and I to share a house outside. Apart from all overhead, no matter how much I save, I can’t save a few copper in a month.
worked like this for several years, and I had no development and no savings to save. I resolutely chose to quit my job and return home. That year was 1996.
Back to my hometown, I didn’t dare to relax and quickly went to take the driver’s license exam because I wanted to learn how to repair cars. As the saying goes, men must have a skill in life so that they won’t have to starve.
There is no salary during the apprenticeship. Not only that, you also have to spend money from time to time to ask the master to go to the restaurant, or buy cigarettes to get a gift to get the technical level.
is busy all day long. You have to do the hardest, dirtiest and most tiring work, and you have to do it well! I often get into the bottom of a diesel vehicle to solve the problem of oil leakage. I stay for an hour or two. After a day, I am covered in dirty oil and emit a foul smell that is hard to cover up. No matter how I wash it, it is difficult to wash it.
After one year of apprenticeship, I am half-finished and can get some salary. Although it is not much, I can make money at all times. However, this job is too dirty and bitter, and it can't be washed and it can't be done with oil. In the second year of my career, I was really tired of it. After thinking about it, I decided to give up repairing the car and return to Shanghai. I think the opportunity in the metropolis is better after all...
This time I returned to Shanghai, and I had a driver's license and knew how to repair the car. Naturally, the direction of finding a job is related to the car, and I became a driver of all kinds of cars. After driving freight trucks, cars, vans, etc., my income has also increased steadily year by year. The highest monthly income is 3,500 yuan. It was the time when I drove a mixer truck, but it was extremely hard and the 24-hour shift was held.
In other words, you have to work all day in a high concentration! But for me, as long as I can earn more money and lose my life, I will do whatever I want, just because I am afraid of being poor.
Later I saved some money. In 2008, when I was almost over, my parents saw that I was still alone and were very anxious. So they asked the matchmaker to find a marriage for me in their hometown. It was the woman who cuckolded me later.
Our two families are not far apart and belong to the same town. Her village is only three kilometers away from my home.
Not long after the blind date, we confirmed the relationship. When I go to work in Shanghai, she comes to me almost every month, helps me with laundry, cooking, housework, and often brings me local specialties from my hometown.
After work, I took her hand and took her to the Huangpu River to see the buildings of all nations, and walked through the streets and alleys of Shanghai. Eight months later, I married her.
In the spring of the following year, my eldest daughter was born. For this reason, I resigned and rushed back to my hometown from Shanghai in advance to take good care of the mother and daughter. Don’t mention how beautiful I was at that time, I finally became a father and had infinite longing for the future.
With a daughter, I have a stronger desire to work. I want to earn more money and promise her a better life. So, I decided to drive a long-distance bus, at least three to five days, or at most half a month, and all the food, drink, defecation and urination were all in the car.
Although it is hard, it can hardly cost your own money. As long as you are in the car, all the expenses will be reimbursed. So I can hand over all my salary of 3,500 a cent every month to her and feel relieved about it.
The sun and moon reincarnation, and in the second half of 2010, my second daughter was born.
Although I am under great pressure, I am getting more and more excited as I work, because children are my motivation, my future and hope. While I was working hard to sports cars, I took care of my parents and children at home with her. I never spend a penny indiscriminately. The belt was so decayed that I could not tie it, so I tied it with a hemp rope as a belt and handed it to her every month's salary to her. At that time, I thought she was more laborious than me, after all, the whole family relied on her to take care of her.
She is usually very frugal, after all, they were all born in the countryside and suffered hardships. She was wearing a pair of sneakers that were worn and faded, and she couldn't bear to throw them away, let alone spending money on maintenance and dressing up. For this reason, I feel guilty, so when I come back from a sports car, I always bring her some gifts, clothes, socks, shoes, which are all bargains.
In those two years, she and I were together through thick and thin, united and worked together to create a happy and beautiful home for the elderly and children.
Because of the long-distance running, I stayed at home for a short time and I spent very little time with her. Sometimes I often feel guilty when thinking about this.
So I was thinking about making up for my guilt in terms of money. Apart from the expenses I had to pay, not only was the rest of the salary given to her, but never asked. I have no suspicion for her! In my opinion, the trust between husband and wife is higher than anything else.
Seasons change, and in the blink of an eye, the eldest daughter went to kindergarten, and the second daughter also began to learn to walk.
This age is still exhausting energy. I felt sorry for her that she couldn't take care of her, so I decided not to travel long distances, and instead bought a used car and started a business of attracting passengers and taking taxis in my hometown. At least I don’t have to be away from sports cars all year round, so I can take care of my family with her. At that time, I thought that the couple worked together to cut off money and there was no difficulty that could not be overcome.
But things went against my expectations. The business of soliciting customers was not as easy as I thought. After a year, the money I earned was not enough to spend.
so I simply sold my car and found another way out.
This time it was 2013. The two children were getting older and their parents were getting older. In addition, the two were in a state of worry. They had to buy medicine to see a doctor every month. There were more and more places to spend money, and the pressure increased sharply.
That night I discussed with her and advised her and I to go out to make a living with me. After all, my ability alone is difficult to support this family, so she agreed.
After a week, she and I went south to Humen, Dongguan, and worked in a small factory of a cousin. The work intensity is very high, and I often work overtime late at night, and I can also do it all night long.
Her cousin has just started a business and saves as much expenses as possible in all aspects of the factory. It’s just like food, it’s really hard to describe, but it’s hard to swallow. But in order to save money, I also bit the bullet and eat in the factory every day, and I almost couldn't go out to the restaurant. When I really encountered food that I couldn't eat, I went back to the dormitory to cook noodles.
may have a light diet, and I was not used to the local environment. Soon I suffered from gastroenteritis . After the operation, the wound had not healed, so I couldn't wait to return to the factory to work.
work hard and save money. With her and I worked together, we saved 80,000 yuan that year. When I saw the amount on my deposit, I was so happy. Thinking of the children and the elderly at home, all the suffering is worth it.
At this moment, I was in high spirits and seemed to see the better days in the future. So I discussed with her that I would work hard for another two years to save some money to renovate the house in my hometown so that the elderly and children can live in a decent and comfortable manner.
But she never expected that she refused and said sternly that she didn't want to stay outside.
repeated persuasion but failed, so I had to give up and return home with her.
Later, according to her wishes, she opened a hardware store in her hometown town, which was mainly run by her, and I did some odd jobs outside.
neither she nor I have any experience in opening a store, so she originally had to take care of it, so I just didn't ask. When her business was not good, she went to the next store to play mahjong, and she didn't spend any effort on business. In the end, there was no need to say much, the hardware store closed down for more than a year.
has no source of income, and it is impossible to support my family by relying on my little odd job income. So in 2016, I embarked on the road to working outside.
During this period, my father-in-law suffered from liver cancer . She called to ask for money, and I immediately pieced together 50,000 yuan to transfer it to her.
She also worked at that time and helped sell clothes in a clothing store in the county. One day she called me and told me that from now on, she would bear all the expenses at home, and save the money I earned outside for the future to build a house.
frankly, I was secretly happy to hear her words and had endless imagination about the future.
Then before too long, she suddenly called me and told me that she was pregnant again. I didn't dare to think about it at that time, and my first reaction was heavy again.
She quit her job and took care of her baby at home, and I took the burden of the family alone for a moment.
From 2016 to 2018, in the past two or three years, I borrowed money while working to earn money. I raised 630,000 yuan and built my house at home, and most of it was borrowed money.
In order to pay off the debt early, I dare not take a day off. I work for 365 days a year, and it has not stopped for the time being. Even if I suffer from a headache and fever, I dare not take leave. I take some medicine and keep working.
2020, the year when the epidemic was the worst, I worked in Wenzhou . She called and said she wanted to go to Jinhua to jointly organize civil engineering with a friend.
I was very nervous when I heard this. The current economic environment is not suitable for investment, and ordinary families like us cannot tolerate any mistakes. But no matter how I dissuaded her, she still insisted on her own and stubbornly went to Jinhua.
After she arrived in Jinhua, she chose to answer my call, and finally she turned out to either not answer or shut down.
Intuition tells me that she has another man there.
As expected, I asked her on the phone that night, where was the person, and she said she was resting in her residence. But I vaguely heard a subtle sound on the other end of the phone, and I was relieved.
That night I rushed to Jinhua and cat near her residence because I didn’t know the specific location of her rented house.
The next morning, at about ten o'clock, I saw her, and was walking towards the street intimately with a middle-aged man talking and laughing with a middle-aged man from a small hotel next to him.
This scene was not bad. When I saw it, a burst of anger suddenly rose in my chest, making me angry and my three corpse gods furious. For thirteen years, I have trusted her so much that she actually messed with other men outside with me on her back.
I could no longer suppress the anger in my chest. I rushed forward with a series of heavy punches according to the man's face. The man couldn't resist it and retreated and fell to the ground. I was still not satisfied and raised my hand and slapped her several times.
I looked at her with tears in my eyes, looking at this woman who had been with me for thirteen years, my heart hurt so much, like a knife.
The man doesn’t cry easily, but he just doesn’t feel sad. I cried, burst into tears, and then left without looking back.
Think about it, there are four children in the family, old parents, I let her go, just pretend that I let myself go. The adults’ bastard should not be borne by the children! Children cannot live without their mothers, and I know the importance of 's native family .
never thought that I forgave her, and she refused.
Half a month later, she called me, and was lazy and talked nonsense with me. She said straight to the point that she would take away the eldest daughter and the pair of twins born later, and only leave her second daughter to me.
Hearing this, I was as if a monk was confused and was stunned for a while.
Why only the second daughter is left for me to raise? What other three children are going to take away? ? ?
When I was about to ask the reason, she suddenly hung up the phone and was blocked when she called!
thirteen years of husband and wife's relationship is broken, just say it's broken... In addition to heartache, heartache.
I couldn't sleep for days and nights, and I couldn't sleep. What came to my mind was the hardship she had paid for this family over the past ten years, and I worked hard to make money. All my hard-earned money was paid in full, but in the end it was still a situation of heavy debt.
Later I found out that she had a loan of 400,000 yuan. The transferee was a man's name, and I think it was her lover!
My heart was cold, and when I thought of how heartless she was towards me, my heart was completely dead. I no longer have any fantasies, and she and I will never be able to return to the past.
Finally, under the constant persuasion of relatives and friends, I mustered up the courage to take my four children to do paternity test ! The reason I delayed to the end was because I watched these four children grow up. I loved them far more than myself. I dared not and did not want to hurt them at all.
On the way to go, I hoped that the children would be my blood, so that I would divorce her decisively and raise the four children alone.
Blessings come unparalleled, but misfortunes never come in singular ways. Sometimes I often sigh that my life is so funny, or to be more precise, it is too sad!
None of the children I have worked hard to raise are my own children. Who in the world can withstand this blow?
identification result was so dazzling. I seemed to have been beaten by Gorge, and was stunned like a wooden sculpture, for a long time... for a long time!
God, the earth, you are not kind and righteous, I have never done anything shameful. Even if you are an ordinary person, you cannot treat me as a straw dog like this.
Thirteen years of bitterness, and in the end, all the worlds are empty, like a dream.
My wife ran away, the child was gone, the money was gone, and there was no debt and a grief!
I wanted to ask her for an explanation, but I couldn't find it, and she hid from me. So with anger, I went to her parents' home. Before I could enter the door, I was knocked to the ground by her two brothers.
I was furious and turned around and returned home. I had a three-sharp knife. They stayed in the door and called the police...
Nowadays, the affairs of my family and I are becoming more and more complicated. How much do I value my family, care for my wife, pamper the children, and do enough to take responsibility and responsibilities that men should have. But what did I get in the end? Like a fool, he was played with and arranged.
I just want to have a home, a place that doesn’t need much, just be warm and happy, and strive for it for the rest of my life.
This year's Mid-Autumn Festival, I miss the children very much. Although they are not related by blood, they are also raised by me with hard work. That kind of emotion is beyond words.
I bought a lot of their favorite snacks, fruits and mooncakes, and waited for them to get off school at the school gate. But I never expected that when the children saw me, they seemed to see the plague god, and they were afraid to avoid it...
At this moment, I seemed to have fallen into a thousand-foot ice cave, cold and helpless!
Later, I became taciturn, alone, and did not communicate with others. I dare not trust anyone except my parents.
I even think that everyone's eyes look at me are strange, as if saying: , it's that fool who is reluctant to give up food, clothing and expenses. As a result, he helped others raise children, and his wife ran away with others.
Nowadays, I have nothing except a lot of debts. I have experienced all the dangers of this world and have no worries.
The only thing I can't let go of is my parents who are old and fainting. I just want to use all my life to accompany my parents to the end of my life.
The author writes it at the end:
People will be tired when they live, no one can bear the sadness for you, everything depends on yourself, constantly sum up experience from adversity, and gradually learn to be strong and be a human being. This is life, this is life. In life, grass grows in autumn, and a person will only last forever. Live well!
