Owning a house is the prerequisite for many people to get married.
Of course, buying a house is not easy, but if you don’t have a house, it is not convenient for your child’s growth. After all, no one wants to move with your child often.
House is the cornerstone of family stability. Under normal circumstances, no one will move a house. The dispute between the young couple below also reflects the mentality of many people. If there is no house in marriage, can it be long-term?
Xiao Chen is a city girl and her only daughter. After she graduated from college, her parents were reluctant to let her marry far away, so she asked her to return to the county town and had a job in the county town.
At the age of marriage, many people helped her introduce her partner. Xiao Chen only fell in love with Zhao Jun. In her eyes, Zhao Jun is flexible and handsome.
When we first met, Zhao Jun promised to buy a house locally. He said that his parents would support him and would also help with the down payment. But after a period of love, Zhao Jun no longer mentioned buying a house, but instead instilled her with the idea of doing business.
Xiao Chen fell in love and believed in Zhao Jun's words. Her mother was calm. She went to Zhao Jun's house to take a look and it was just an old yard in the countryside. How could she get married under such conditions?
The attitude of the mother-in-law is that my daughter is marrying her in the countryside, and if she wants to marry my daughter, she can’t buy a house in the city for the time being. At least she must first take out the down payment for buying a house.
After communication, the man's parents agreed to give a 170,000 yuan gift, and the money was also used as the down payment for buying a house and kept by the woman. However, both parties must get married first and then consider where to buy a house after having children.
Xiao Chen agreed. She felt that the man was willing to give her 170,000 yuan, which already showed his intention to buy a house. It doesn’t matter if he was late, it mainly did not affect the child’s study.
The wedding of the two was very simple, so they invited relatives from both sides to have a meal. Zhao Jun’s parents and brother were doing business in Jiangxi all year round. After graduating from high school, he also followed his parents to Jiangxi. He wanted to go out independently to do business, but he was struggling to find a way that suits him.
The second year of marriage, Xiao Chen gave birth to his first child and the matter of buying a house was also mentioned. Although Xiao Chen also came to Jiangxi, she had no sense of belonging to the local area and always felt that she was not used to the local life. She really wanted to go back to her hometown to buy a house and settle down, and the whole family lived a down-to-earth life.
Zhao Jun’s idea was just the opposite. He saw his brother’s business getting bigger and bigger, and he bought two houses. He thought he could do it, so he kept thinking about what to do, so he didn’t want to move that amount of money and was ready to use the startup capital for the business.
In order to let Xiao Chen support him, Zhao Jun told her: "After buying a house in , you also need to pay the mortgage. If you don't have a stable income, even if you have a house, it will be difficult. It's better to do business by making more money, so that you can have a comfortable life."
Xiao Chen was persuaded that she did not mention buying a house. The two lived in Jiangxi for a few years, rented a single room, and lived an ordinary life. Zhao Jun always had a business dream. Unfortunately, he really had no talent, and the second treasure was born, and he did not find a business that suited him.
The two have been married for 7 years and have saved tens of thousands of yuan in their hands. At this rate, the expectation of buying a house is far away. Perhaps it is because they are being nagged too much. Zhao Jun wants to play with the big one. His uncle opened a coal transportation company, which allows him to participate in the shares. The total investment is more than one million, and he needs to take out 500,000.
Zhao Jun calculated his savings, plus the 170,000 yuan he gave to his wife before getting married, which was far from enough. He thought of his mother-in-law and hoped that his wife would borrow 200,000 yuan from his mother-in-law, so that he would have his own career.
Xiao Chen is opposed. She feels that she can make money and lose money in business, and no one will guarantee you . Her parents are both working-class people, and saving that little pension money can't stand the tossing. If she loses money, her desire to buy a house will be empty.
The couple argued over this, should they buy a house first or do business?
None of them convinced each other, life is full of quarrels, Xiao Chen is tired, she returns to her hometown, her parents are old and have a lot of white hair on her head. Thinking that she still has no stable home, Xiao Chen feels very disappointed.
Both parents feel sorry for their daughter. The mother thought about it and told her that she had booked a house and had paid a deposit of 200,000 yuan. It was originally used to support her, but if her daughter wants it, she will give it to her.
The mother’s idea is very simple. Instead of quarreling all the time, it is better to settle the matter early and subsidize 200,000 yuan by yourself, just act as supporting her daughter. In the future, the daughter can provide her with appropriate retirement. Anyway, she is just such an only daughter, and her family property will be left to her daughter.
Xiao Chen was very happy. She took out 170,000 yuan in savings to use as the down payment for buying a house. Because the name of her mother was written when booking the house, it takes time to transfer the property. It will take only about a year to get the real estate certificate. Xiao Chen is not worried at all, and his mother cannot deceive herself.
After Zhao Jun found out about this, he was furious and beat Xiao Chen hard. He felt that his wife had cheated him. How could he not say hello to him if he was such a big deal about buying a house?
In order to calm the anger of his son-in-law, the mother-in-law gave him the ID and card, and promised that when the property certificate was released, she would cooperate with the transfer of the property, and the mortgage would be paid by the son-in-law. This house belongs to the daughter and son-in-law.
Zhao Jun threw the card out, and he retorted: " house is the name of my mother-in-law. I actually want me to pay my mortgage, dreaming."
At the critical moment when the couple was quarreling about the house, Zhao Jun's mother was sick. She was diagnosed with cancer and needed about 200,000 yuan to undergo surgery. Zhao Jun finally had a reason and asked to sell the house and treat her mother.
His reason was that his mother had suffered for most of her life and could not not see a sick person. She could still buy a house in the future. If her mother-in-law didn't sell the house, she would give her 400,000 yuan.
Mother-in-law smiled angrily. She couldn't expect that the boy she trusted at the time would be so cruel now. She asked her son-in-law: ", you said I must give you money. Whose down payment for buying a house is? Even if my daughter gives 170,000 yuan, it is also the bride gift you gave before marriage. Answer the money for buying a house, what's wrong with the special money?"
In the mother-in-law's opinion, the daughter is really pitiful. She gave birth to two children and couldn't go out to work. The family rented in a small room. The child wanted to study. If the house was sold, it would be difficult to buy a house in the future.
. Zhao Jun didn't care about these things. He insisted that filial piety was the first and had to treat his mother first. He even blamed his wife for being cruel and not knowing how to respect the elderly.
Seeing Zhao Jun's anger, Xiao Chen cried. She said to her husband: " I don't want to sell the house. I hope we have our own home. My mother-in-law is sick. Do we really need us to sell the house? My brother's business is going smoothly. He already has several houses. His father-in-law also has two storefronts and a house. Why can't he sell one storefront to treat his mother-in-law? We only have this house."
stands from the perspective of the bystander and understands Xiao Chen's approach. Even if the family is about to sell a house to treat the disease, there is a distinction between them.
- Some netizens said: "I am my mother-in-law and I don't agree to selling a house for medical treatment. This little money is just a drop in the bucket. Besides, the conditions of the mother-in-law's family are good. The mother-in-law should not let her sell the house because of the fact that the young daughter-in-law has two children."
- Some netizens said: "The key point of the man is to ask the woman to get the money. It is just an excuse for the mother-in-law to use money when she is sick. The man has a son and has a certain financial strength. He insists on asking the woman to get the money when she is sick. The man has a son and has a certain amount of financial strength. He insists on asking the woman to get the money when she is sick. It’s very selfish to sell a house and get money. ”
- Some netizens said: “You can’t live this life. The man’s family is in the first place. The woman will definitely suffer a loss. Divorce first. You will give the child support fee to more than 100,000 yuan first.”
Everyone’s eyes are bright. When you meet a selfish man, the more you pay, the more you suffer.
Through the real experience of this young couple, we tell us that we must depend on the family when getting married. Whether a happy marriage or not has absolutely anything to do with love, but also depends on the other person’s character. So how can we avoid encountering similar things?
1. A good match, learn more about the other party’s family before getting married. The so-called equality of the family is not only about the same economic strength, but also about the same values. Only by such a family combination can we avoid conflicts when encountering problems.
2. It is best to be independent of each other for families . Conflicts in a family are often caused by parents' bias, which is a weakness of human nature and will occur in many families. To reduce similar problems, it is better to live independently after marriage. It may be harder, but it can help you lose some worries.
3. No one can touch the money for buying a house, so the couple should discuss it carefully. does not recommend that your wife buy a house quietly, which can easily make your husband feel that he is not respected, but you can understand the sense of security your wife wants. It is recommended to communicate with your husband that no one can move the money for buying a house, and it is not good to do business. Only by living a stable life can you enjoy your business. The greater your ability to do the big things, and avoid tiptoeing to start a business, the pressure will be great.
4. My mother-in-law is sick, and the whole family shares the pressure together. Generally speaking, if the father-in-law has a storefront and housing, he will give him the money first. After all, it is the common property of the father-in-law. If the father-in-law is reluctant to leave the storefront, he must take the money from the youngest son, and he can also transfer the storefront to the youngest son's name, which is suitable for both parties.
Summary:
Parents need their children to be filial, but they must also consider the difficulties of their children. Only when their children’s families are stable can parents live a happy life.
If your son has multiple houses, it is natural to sell one, but if there is only one house, it is really not recommended to sell it. You must always think about the child. When you encounter a family that insists on letting your son sell a house for treatment, you should leave. You will feel very tired because there is no love.
