Many years ago, I began to think about a question: What exactly is the cause of a person's failure? I have thought deeply about this problem. This thought at least helps me, so as to avoid me from going to the wrong path and going to the wrong path, and eventually leading to the complete failure of my life.
I thought about it and I came to a conclusion: Men are easily harmed by ambitions, and women are easily harmed by vanity.
If a woman does not have too strong vanity, or has no vanity at all, if a man does not have ambition, he will probably be safe in his life. Below the ambition is the desire of ignorance. Adding ignorance to desire is called "ignorant desire".
There is a novel called "The Dream of the Bridge", which is estimated to have been watched by many fans. Hollywood, the United States, also brought this novel to the screen.
The author of this novel said this on the title page: "The hormones on men create the sins in this world ". It is androgens and testosterone that create the sins of this world. This statement makes sense, at least in this novel, it makes sense.
But in terms of generality, it is still men who are hurt by ambition, while women are hurt by vanity.
Let me first talk about the issue of ambition, what is ambition?
Let’s first read a sentence from the Tao Te Ching. Laozi in the Tao Te Ching said: Five colors make people blind, five tones make people deaf, and five flavors make people feel refreshed (the mouth is numb when the taste is numb). Galloping in the field makes people crazy (the hunting in the field, the old man talks about the young man crazy, the left pulls yellow, the right lifts blue, and the galloping in the field makes people crazy, and the heart is crazy, and the heart is crazy, and you can’t control your heart).
From this sentence, we have a basic idea to understand ambition: The so-called ambition is a heart that is relaxed, a wild heart, and a heart that is out of control.
If you compare the heart to a kind of wild horse, you control it with the reins and let the horse obey your command and your mobilization. But the horse ran away and ran around.
Ambition is a heart that lacks rationality, a heart that lacks restraint, a heart that lacks management, and a heart that lacks wisdom.
Once a person has ambition, he must be less wise and unreasonable, and his self-control also has problems. Behind his ambition is desire.
So men often have to be a high-ranking official, make big money, and make big achievements...
I have a friend who is very rich. From his face, you can see that he is an ambitious person. He looked down on others when he was young. He really wanted to make a fortune. Now he has finally made a fortune. There are many villas, and in many famous cities in China, he has villas.
But I think he is not happy. He and I are the same age as me. If you look at his face and then on my face, our face looks very different.
people once they are controlled by their ambitions, it is very difficult to let them put down their ambitions.
Ambition plus a vigorous and ambitious one, that is even more terrifying. means that his ambition is in a strong state. When his ambition is in a strong state, he will prompt you to keep doing things and working hard. In the process of hard work and struggle, you will continue to use any means, you will harm the interests of others, you will also oppress others, dominate others, control others, attack others, and even destroy others.
Finally, I finally climbed to the peak you wanted. After climbing to the peak, you are old and your body is collapsed.
The heart cannot bear the ambition, the heart can only bear the calm heart. So we say "calm and calm" and " is indifferent to one's will " very interesting. When you are indifferent, your heart will be very, very clear.
It is not a good thing for men to expand their ambitions. people are controlled by a desire, that is, they want to become great talents, make a fortune, be a high official, do great things, and be a powerful person, and be a powerful person. After being controlled by this desire, they will inevitably develop ambitions.
This wise man, I, telling us to be emptied. There is nothing messy in your heart: wild heart, barbaric heart, rough heart, ambition all contain these consciousnesses.
Women are suffering from vanity. Vanity is a mixture of toxic desire and inferiority.
I want it, but I don’t have it. I just love vanity. Below the vanity is a restless heart, an uneasy heart, and a heart that is not confident.
If a person completely accepts himself and appreciates his true self, he is the real self in reality, then he will not have vanity. Whoever has vanity will not have true self-confidence, no one will have true reality, what you have is false reality.
We can carefully combine our reality and observe the people around us to see how we are tortured by vanity?
I recently met a small boss who had no ability to buy a villa at all, but the whole family bought a villa of more than 300 square meters and then bought a luxury car.
The result is affected by the epidemic and various complex factors. In addition to the economic prosperity, he only loses money every day, but does not make money. Paying the mortgage and car loan every month makes him breathless and anxious all day long.
Some time ago, I called me and said, "Teacher Wang, I'm going to die." I said, "What's wrong?" " My heart is so fast that I can't get angry anymore. I have to hurry to go to the hospital. I guess I'm dying! "
This is a "panic attack", also called "acute attack of anxiety". He did not have this symptoms in the past, but now he has it because the pressure is too great now.
If someone can live in a villa, he will ask him to live in. If we can’t live in a thatched hut, we will live in a thatched hut. I just wrote " The hut is broken by the autumn wind " in the thatched hut. Why do you have to buy a villa?
People who can defeat vanity are the wisest people, the best mentality, and the most real people.
If a person, you find that he has no vanity in him, he is very real, and this person is worthy of your relationship. People with strong vanity are not worth dating.
What is vanity? It is a heart that pursues false glory. If you want to get glory but do not, then use various methods to gain glory to cover up your lack!
Finally, please remember these two sentences: Men are hurt by ambition, and women are hurt by vanity!
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推线大学推线大学推线大学推线大学推线大学推线大学推线大学推线大学推线大学推线大学推线大学推线大学推线大学推线大学推线大学推线大学推线大学推线大学推线大学推线大学推线大学推线大学推线大学推线大学推线大学推线大学推线� He was the chief academic consultant of the Psychologist Magazine and a senior psychotherapist at Shanghai Boai Hospital . He is one of the most powerful and talented psychologists in China.
has published more than ten influential psychology monographs. Among them, " Breakthrough Treatment for Student Psychological Problems " was listed as a collection of books by hundreds of domestic universities such as Peking University , Tsinghua University , Tsinghua University , "50 Psychological Treatment and Adjustment Methods" won the Most Popular Book Award for Readers in the China Colleges and Universities Press Alliance, "The 10 Most Important Relationships in Life" was listed as a Psychological Master Series by China Culture Press , and "Shaking Hands with Depression" won the Most Popular Professional Book Award for Readers.
