Yesterday, my grandmother’s 90th birthday, as her son-in-law, the third uncle, notified everyone a month in advance that they would come for a reunion dinner.
So, my mother and three aunts each brought their families to their grandmother's house. The third uncle arranged five tables of food, but there was still no place to sit.
just stood around the table and everyone was particularly happy. Apart from the festival, they could bring the whole family together, so there were not many opportunities.
Grandma is still in good health. As before, she invited her grandchildren to eat meat, fish and chicken legs, hoping to put a piece on each person to express her concern.
People of different generations are talking about different topics, but after all, it is mostly "reporting good news but not bad news". Some topics are deliberately avoiding.
01
Just eat together and don’t care about your livelihood.
Uncle San is one of the best chefs in the countryside. The farmhouse mat he makes always makes people eat the delicious food in his memory.
For this "good craft", people who originally said they were "not available" also squeezed out time and rushed back for lunch.
In the early years, my third uncle had been working hard to help others build a house and shouldering the burden of his family.
Until a few years ago, because I was old, I had to consider "changing careers".
Originally, my grandmother was worried that she would even spend money on buying cooking utensils and tables and chairs, but she didn't expect that she would become her "main business" of her third uncle.
This hard-earned money is not easy to make. It is time-consuming and labor-intensive, and it also has to withstand smoke and fire. It is really a big challenge for a person in his 60s.
Aunt San goes to "help the kitchen" every time. When he is too busy, he will call on several other aunts, saying that his family members can be assured of their work and their salary will not be deducted, which is a "win-win".
The back of "the business is getting better and better" is the helplessness of "no pension" and "children can't take care of themselves".
Not only my third uncle and third uncle are engaged in heavy physical work all year round, but the other three aunts and uncles are still busy making a living: they still plant a few acres of paddy fields so that they can "buy rice" for money; they also raise chickens, ducks, cattle, pigs, or odd jobs as their main source of income.
No one expected that when they were old, they would still live so tiring, working hard for their children all their lives, but after they got married and started a business, they did not become their "safe haven".
Dark skin, gray hair, and increasingly hunched body, under the pressure of time, smiles have become scarce.
Occasional reunion is a rare "holiday" and a complete "relaxation", so the food is very rich and playing cards has become a pleasure.
Uncle San went out to buy vegetables at five o'clock in the morning. He worked hard in the kitchen with his third aunt for the whole morning. At around twelve o'clock, ten meat dishes and two vegetables were served on the table. is full of color, fragrance and taste. Everyone tasted them happily and feasted, reminding people of the "tooth-beating festival" when they were young.
Grandma is naturally happy. She is used to taking care of everyone. She either calls on her third uncle who has not been served yet, or persuades food to drink, or even calls her great-grandchildren who are constantly yelling. She would rather not eat by herself than greet her.
Once upon a time, some people advised her to just eat by themselves, and some people scolded her for spoiling the child like this, but for decades, my grandmother couldn't change it, and her loud greetings became part of the dining table .
Although everyone is very "uncomfortable", they gradually obey her needs: a big house, a large group of juniors, food, drink, and housing, and are more than the best than the best. They must know how to cherish and enjoy this simplest happiness.
02
only talks about raising children, not about how to educate them.
The inheritance of a family naturally requires a strong incense.
Grandma has ten grandchildren, all of whom have married and have more than ten great-grandchildren. In her opinion, this is the best annotation for the prosperity of the family and the successor.
However, half of the ten grandchildren failed to get out of the mountains and still worked for a living for farming, but they could not calm down. They learned to "diil food from the soil", and often went out to work, and came back after spending all the travel expenses, thinking of ways to "limit the parents".
Among the great-grandchildren, several of them go out to work because of their parents, and sometimes they tinker at home for a few tricks, and they don’t want to study early.
Grandma often sees it in her eyes and is anxious in her heart. She whipped them hard with a whip, and took them back to the desk with great sincerity, using very unstandard Mandarin to study with them and supervise them to do their homework.
Because of the differences in work, common topics are naturally much less. Apart from asking each other about how many times a week, how many hours a week, how to arrange the holidays, etc., we never dare to talk in depth.
Blue-collar workers and white-collar workers, working, farming, being teachers, doctors, and doing business and politics, with different working methods and incomes, their horizons and patterns are naturally very different.
It’s just that no one wants to talk more, there is no harm without comparison, and everyone is taking care of other people’s feelings carefully.
Therefore, the topic is mostly about children: children’s embarrassing things and the hard work of raising children, but children’s naughty, don’t like to read, and are addicted to playing mobile games can only be stranded aside, and no one wants to dig deeper.
Reading changes destiny. Those who have not been able to follow this path want to hope for the next generation, but the limitations of vision and pattern make this simple wish without fertile soil.
Once you encounter setbacks, you will throw out "Those who can read will naturally be able to read, and it is useless to teach no matter how you don't know how to read", and often give up easily.
03
only talks about the present, not about how to support the elderly.
Every year, my third uncle always has a big fuck.
On this day, not only are the meal tables full of meat dishes, but even the fresh fruits of the season don’t care how expensive they are. They buy a large box, and there are also wine, drinks, and snacks that children love to eat, which are all very rich.
The way to make everyone "eat open their stomachs" is always a pain of "fishing through exhaustion".
Perhaps, the daily expense is equivalent to their monthly living expenses.
On ordinary days, in addition to making some delicious food for two children who are in school, the food of grandma, third aunt and third uncle is extremely frugal.
In such a big family, young and middle-aged people should be shouldering the financial burden of the family, but the third aunt and third uncle's only son would only take their daughter-in-law to "limit their parents" together, so they would send their children to school, and they would have to do it for them.
Over the years, for the sake of his "unprofitable" son, the third aunt has been angry and crying with them, and the grandmother has to help with housework so that the third aunt and the third uncle can free up time to make money.
But time is unforgivable. Even though my third aunt and third uncle get up early and go into the dark every day, they are diligent and willing to work hard, and their aging and illness are gradually coming to the door.
is really sick and needs injections or hospitalization, so they are forced to rest. As long as they get a little better, they will go to work again.
"As long as you can do it for one day, do your job well." This is not only the plan of the third aunt and third uncle, but also the plan of the other aunts and uncles; of course, it is also the reality that our generation has to face.
As for who is too old to walk, it seems that there is no need to consider who will support her. In fact, there is no way to consider it.
One day is probably the best way to live.
04
Conclusion:
Grandma's birthday dinner, everyone had dinner before they finished. During this period, there were two tables of people playing cards, and one table was played until early morning of the next day.
In grandma's words, they are all their own people, and they still fall in the same basket if they lose and win. The purpose is to be happy.
Yes, everyone has their own way of living, and everyone is striving forward in their own "Shura Field".
When brothers and sisters embark on different journeys, they will have different lives. In the future, they can only be at peace with each other, which is the best comfort for each other.
Author: It’s as light as the wind and light as the clouds.
Your happiness, my blessings.
pictures are from the Internet.
