Zhu Deyong once said:
"Life is a downpour, destiny is an umbrella full of loopholes, and love is a patch."
Even if life is difficult, love still becomes the desire in our hearts and the precious sweetness we have in those bitter days.
In Maslow's hierarchy of needs theory , it has also been said that when a person is satisfied at the material level, he will work towards the spiritual level, want to gain a sincere relationship, and want to meet someone who can work together for a lifetime.
Even if the love between us is not that deep, we still long for a comfortable relationship and to meet people who can fight alongside each other.
However, it is not that easy for couples to get along with each other.
Originally, the union between husband and wife is to work together to overcome more difficulties, but many people go against each other's love and are arrogant because of their favor.
not only did not make each other's getting along more comfortably and life happier, but instead made that relationship fall sharply to freezing point until it was completely broken.
There is no medicine for regret in this world, and there is no chance to come back.
Once some feelings are broken, it is difficult to reunite them. Once some relationships come to an end, they are enemies.
" in the beauty of life " has a saying:
"I never thought that marriage would be so complicated. I thought that one person would do well, but it is not enough for two people to be together to do well by themselves."
Any relationship requires the joint efforts of both parties.
and The way to get along with smart couples: do these things well.
01: Less picky, more tolerant
professor Liang Yongan of Fudan University once said in an interview with " Characters ":
"Love has a basic emotional characteristic, which is that it is willing to do more for the other party and create happiness for each other. The American humanity test survey shows that in the entire humanity, only 4% of people who truly have altruistic instincts, and the remaining 96% of instincts are selfish."
is selfish, nothing wrong.
But if you want to get a comfortable marriage, you cannot just consider your own feelings, you cannot just care about your own gains and losses, and you cannot just pick on the other party.
Because marriage eventually becomes a dull life, and when there are more and more unfairness between each other, there will be more and more disappointments and more conflicts, which is extremely unfavorable to maintaining a relationship.
Fellowship is a process of continuous running-in, in which you need to pay, rather than just enjoying it or even picky.
No one has to give, and those who are willing to give are just because of love, just because of love. Once love is worn out and love is trampled away, they will not give again.
The way to get along with smart couples: be less picky and more tolerant.
02: Be less reasonable and understand more
Li Dan once said:
"In relationships, if you can't explain the truth clearly, in the end you will win if you don't understand the truth."
Some people always like to reason in relationships. They think that analyzing this relationship from a more rational perspective can make the relationship go better, but in fact, the consequences of doing so will only make the two hearts farther away.
Those seemingly unreasonable behaviors may not be really unreasonable. Sometimes they just want to get more attention and more care.
Once attention is cut off and care is rejected, the relationship cannot warm up, and the two of them get along with each other will only live a cold life together.
In this world, because of different growth experiences, everyone has their own views. Therefore, in some things, no matter how close the relationship is, people may not have the same view. No matter how much reason you say, they cannot completely convince the other party.
In this case, you need to understand each other, understand each other's different experiences, understand each other's different concepts, and seek common ground while reserving differences.
Tolstoy once said:
"When other colors are applied in the purity of love, this kind of love is no longer perfect.But there is no distinction between right and wrong, no distinction between right and wrong, only rational and emotional struggles. "
Indeed, love can make reason give in, and the premise of concession is understanding.
In a good marriage, it may not necessarily be necessary to fully recognize the other party, but understanding must be indispensable.
The way to get along with smart couples: less picky, more tolerant, less reasoning, more understanding.
I am Aya, a warm emotional writer. How lucky I can meet you in this life! Click to follow, let's gain knowledge together!
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