Introduction:
For young people, taking care of the elderly is our obligation, because our parents gave us life, no matter how they feed us, at least they raised us to this age, even if we had a hard time as a child , but our parents have given us the best. Our current achievements are all given by our parents.
But everything has surprises. If there are unfilial children, there must be unqualified parents. Sometimes outsiders can only see the surface, but cannot see through the inside. Some children are unfilial and it is simply because they are too old. If we encounter unreasonable parents, we can endure it once or twice, but if the number of times increases, the children will become disillusioned and unwilling to provide for their parents in their old age. Outsiders only see the unfilial piety of the children, but not the unfilial piety of the elderly. qualified.
Even as parents, we also pay attention to repaying kindness. If children keep giving but cannot be recognized by their parents, it will definitely make the children feel disappointed and even cause the whole family to fall into fierce quarrels.
Sister Wu lives in her daughter's house for retirement. Her monthly pension of 5,000 yuan is not left every month. Her son-in-law can't stand it any longer. He said bluntly: "You still have to be conscientious. What you did is really too much. !”What happened to
? Let's look down together.
The self-report of 60-year-old Sister Wu:
My name is Wu Mengxia, I am 60 years old this year. I was a Chinese teacher when I was young. Now I have a monthly pension of 5,000 yuan. I have two children, the eldest is a daughter and the youngest is a son. , In our era, we all paid attention to raising children for old age, and it was the son's responsibility to provide for his parents in old age, so I have always been more doting on my son.
When I first retired, my two children had not yet given birth, so I I live in my hometown with my wife. The two old people support each other. We both have pensions, so there is no problem in daily life. My wife and I have always had a good relationship, and we are both very frugal characters, so then For a while, I had a pretty good life in my hometown.
Later, my wife passed away due to stomach cancer. I really couldn’t accept this fact at the time. I was very dependent on my wife. My wife made the final decisions for all the little things at home. I was just a hands-off shopkeeper, so when I learned that When I received this bad news, I really couldn't bear the blow. I didn't think about food or drink for several days in a row. I felt that my body was going to collapse if this continued, so I thought about going to a nursing home with my pension.
After my son learned the news, he immediately stopped me. He asked me to go to his place for retirement, and said that this was what he should do as a son. He also said that if I went there, I could help him take care of his children, so I Just pack up your things and go live in your son's city.
has lived in my son’s house for two years. During this period, I have been giving my pension to my son. It is nominally my living expenses, but everyone knows that I can’t spend that much money alone. These are all subsidies. I have to provide for my son, but I am willing to do so, because I can’t spend much money at my son’s house. Nowadays, young people are under a lot of pressure. I should relieve my son’s pressure. During this period, I have been helping to take care of my grandson and do housework. In fact, it is really helpful. It's hard work, but I have no complaints. I am very satisfied that my family can live in harmony like this.
My son will take our family to a restaurant on my birthday, which makes me very happy. Although I am exhausted from serving their family, seeing my son working so hard for my birthday makes me feel that everything is worth it. However, during this period, my daughter showed no expression at all, which made me complain about my daughter.
Later, my daughter-in-law became pregnant with her second child, and my son suggested that the house could no longer be lived in, and the eldest grandson was about to go to junior high school. My son wanted to buy a house in the school district, but they didn’t have that much money. Even if I sell my current house, I still have 200,000 to pay for the down payment.
During this period, my son often sighed, but he never asked me to borrow money. I knew why my son was worried, so I took the initiative to take out my 200,000 savings. Anyway, I will rely on my son to support me in the future. Since I live here for a long time, In my son’s house, it’s appropriate for me to contribute some money.
But after my daughter found out about this, she kept calling me to express her objection. She said: "Mom, I don't care about your money, but it's really unfair for you to do this. I am also your child. Logically speaking, your savings should be half of mine. It really chills me to do this. "
I felt very sad after hearing this. When my daughter got married, I gave her a sufficient dowry. The son’s bride price is the same, and the son-in-law has a good job and makes more money in one month than the son and daughter-in-law make in three months. In comparison, the son’s family needs more help. The daughter really shouldn’t worry about this mere 200,000 yuan. Besides, my daughter usually ignores me, but she finally made a phone call to question me about money, which made me very unhappy.
But my daughter did not continue to care about it, and my son finally bought a house smoothly. I originally thought that the dust had settled in his later years, but at this time other problems arose.
My mother-in-law was very happy when she heard that her son had bought a big house. She said she would come over to see the big house in person and help take care of her grandson. I don’t like my mother-in-law. She is too strong. She always feels that my son is not worthy of their daughter. She has been scorning me for so many years. If my mother-in-law comes, the two young people will go to work during the day, leaving us two old people. It would be so embarrassing at home.
Moreover, the relationship between my daughter-in-law and I has been very tense for so many years. She can’t stand me, and I can’t stand her, but we can’t stand it. I’m really afraid that one day I’ll get into an impulsive quarrel with my daughter-in-law. It’s hard to be a good person with my son in the middle, and maybe the marriage will be broken up. After thinking about it, I decided that it would be better to leave early.
But I didn’t want to live alone, so I decided to stay at my daughter’s house for a while. Even though my daughter had complained about me in the past, she was my biological child after all. When she heard my needs, she immediately expressed her willingness to live there at any time, and she was welcome to stay for as long as she wanted. So I packed up my things and went to my daughter’s house.
I know that my daughter must be unhappy. After all, I paid for her brother to buy a house, but in the end she ended up living in her home. She must have a knot in her heart, but my daughter doesn’t express it, just hides it from me, and I don’t. I pretended not to know, and was responsible for taking my grandson to and from school every day. I didn't need to do any housework at home. My daughter cooked the food every time and I ate it directly, so my life was quite leisurely.
The relationship between my daughter and I has always been at a distance, just like the relationship between relatives, but I think it is acceptable. Until that day, a relative from our hometown came to visit, and there was a child with him. , according to the custom in our hometown, we should give our children a red envelope, but I had no money in my pocket, so I asked my daughter for money and explained the reason.
My daughter immediately gave me five hundred yuan, but at the same time, she asked: "Mom, don't you have 5,000 yuan a month? Your savings were used to buy a house for my brother. I know this, but Since you came to our house, you have kept your pension. Why don’t you even have 500 yuan now? Mom, don’t think too much, I just asked casually.”
I didn’t think so at the time and replied: "I'm not your brother yet. I paid a down payment for the house I bought at that time. Now I have to pay back a loan of 4,000 yuan every month. And didn't your sister-in-law give birth to a second child now? Your brother is under great financial pressure, so I will give every I've given my monthly pension to your brother, which is just enough to pay off the mortgage. You don't mind. After all, your family's conditions are better. With this little pension, I will definitely help your brother."
At that time, after my daughter heard what I said, she looked wrong, but she didn't say anything. She turned around and complained to my son-in-law. Then my son-in-law came over. As soon as he came, he asked me: "Mom, you have to follow your conscience. You are like this. If you go too far, your daughter will be embarrassed to tell you. Let me tell you this.
It was just that you gave all the money to your eldest brother to buy a house. We didn’t care about you. But now that you have retired in our family, you still think about your precious son. If you dare, we deserve to keep paying. Your son is nothing. Take advantage of everything? They are both your biological children, so why is the difference so big? If that's the case, you might as well go back and live with your son. We won't take advantage, but we also want to be fair. What you do is really chilling! "
I was very surprised after hearing this. I didn't expect that my son-in-law would yell at me like this. After all, I am his elder. It was really rude to talk to me like this. But my son-in-law said too much at that time. I My head was in a mess, and I didn't even think of what to say back. Seeing that I didn't respond for a long time, my son-in-law sighed and left.
I packed my things the next day and prepared to go back to my son's house. At that time, my son-in-law kept apologizing to me. , saying that he was too angry at the time and spoke indiscriminately, asking me to ignore the faults of others. My daughter also came to intercede for my son-in-law and asked me not to argue with him, but I never paid attention to them and took the car back to my son. At home.
Later I never accepted their apology because I thought their behavior was extremely rude. Fortunately, my mother-in-law went back to her hometown after taking care of her daughter-in-law’s confinement. During the day, my son and daughter-in-law went to work, and I was responsible for taking care of the children. , life has returned to what it was before. Occasionally, I will have some verbal disputes with my daughter-in-law, but I can still live my life. It’s just that after what happened last time, I won’t go to my daughter’s house anymore no matter what. It’s really too frustrating. People are angry.
Who do you think is right and who is wrong?
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