Should we marry and have children all our lives? If a person has not been married in his whole life, is it a great regret in life? Our psychologists surveyed thousands of dying elderly people and asked them: "If life can be repeated and you choose again, would you still choose to marry and have children?" I am very sad to tell you: Most people's answer is: "No."
We endure the pain of a couple's quarrel and leave our smile and love to others
Marriage and childbirth overdraft our health and greatly reduce our quality of life
Times are changing and society is developing. It is so difficult to raise children in China today! Various depressions in teenagers are very common! In a class of 50 people, at least 10 people with moderate depression need regular medication and psychological counseling to barely maintain a normal life. In addition to those children with relatively poor psychological quality and relatively poor ability to withstand stress, more than half of the people in a class of 50 people are physically and mentally unhealthy. The growth and learning of these children has become a major concern for parents.
One's own children cannot be beaten or scolded. A persuasive, thoughtful, and solemn preaching doesn’t work either. They have their own set of ideas. These ideas are different from when we were young. They are self-willed and do whatever they want. Many parents suffer from depression and anxiety due to their inability to educate their children. In addition, there are many problems in the relationship between husband and wife, which makes it even worse. The Chinese are living very hard. However, the optimistic spirit and the spirit of indomitable struggle and struggle in the bones of the Chinese people are supporting us to continue to move forward with heavy burdens. When they were dying, they said that very emotional sentence: If life can be repeated, I want to live for myself! Don't want to overspend your health and happiness for the sake of your children and family!
Don’t get married if marriage can’t come for the happiness and health of both parties
The wrong concept of marriage has been poisoning Chinese people and making their marriage very tired
2626span The psychologist pointed out: "China’s excellent traditional culture,We Chinese have not inherited much. In the new era, many concepts are no longer suitable for modern Chinese society. At the same time, some powerful and scientific psychological concepts in foreign countries are also unknown to many people. At the same time, we Chinese have never had the scientific concept of marriage and love. The only thing we have is all kinds of wrong ideas and all kinds of poisonous chicken soup.” Women are big. Men earn money and women spend, women only care about beauty; men must let women; women’s obesity is called plump; women’s willfulness is cute; women’s ignorance is naive; women’s incompetence is normal; women are somewhat capable Just yell; women love vanity and love comparison; women refuse personal growth and strong and independent under the guise of weakness. In addition to wanting to obtain all kinds of desires and vanity to satisfy themselves, women can hardly find them in their minds. Any advantages.
Our traditional culture emphasizes that women must be fixed, such as Dinghai Shenzhen. A Dinghai can even benefit a family for at least three generations; women need to be calm and calm like water. Water conserves everything without fighting, a woman who is as quiet as water. It must be an important guarantee for the prosperity of a family; women must be soft and feminine as water, no matter how great difficulties, setbacks, and family changes, they can be easily faced with strong enough flexibility. In fact, there are few women who uphold this philosophy. Now!
A woman who feels like water is already a few stars
Western psychology is scientific. Freedom, equality, and fraternity are important. Men and women fall in love, even after marriage, the cost is often AA system. In the eyes of women, they are the same as men and are equal. There is no saying that men spend money for themselves. If men frequently invite themselves to eat and spend money for themselves, then they look down on themselves and regard themselves as Waste.
Of course, gifts are excluded. Gifts represent love and affection. The cost of daily life is AA system. In China? Huh! Marriage is the opportunity for a woman to become a phoenix; it is to become a rich man from the poor Opportunities for women; from struggling by oneself to relying on men; from hard work to laziness. This is what most women think,It's just the pressure of real life that they have to work harder again after getting married to raise their children. In this way, the unreasonable concept of marriage and love and the pressure of life have seriously overdrawn the happiness and health of the Chinese people, making them no longer want to marry and have children.
In addition, Western psychology also advocates and pays attention to freedom. After a man and a woman get married, the man thinks of another woman in his heart; the woman still loves another man in his heart. As long as you don't cheat and express your love for the opposite sex in various ways, this is your freedom. in China? snort! A man is thinking of other women? Don't be discovered by the Chinese wife, if you are discovered by your wife, use your imagination! Chinese men are too unfree to live! There are too many principles and moral constraints in the relationship between husband and wife in China! At the same time, it is filled with all kinds of ignorant, ridiculous, and inverted black and white absurd ideas for guidance. The pain and pressure of the Chinese have become inevitable. Happiness and physical and mental health, joy and peace have become extravagant hopes.
No matter how difficult life is, smile happily
In short, what do you rely on to run a happy marriage in China? Without the support of scientific concepts, only all kinds of greed, willfulness, poisonous chicken soup, and misconceptions guide our marriage, leading to a very low rate of marriage happiness in China! The divorce rate is high! People who are not divorced are also struggling desperately in pain! If life can be repeated, we will never get married and have children again! Enough for a long time!
The Chinese have a philosophy of tolerance and self-sacrifice in their bones
The Chinese are the most industrious people in the world! The Chinese are the smartest people in the world! The Chinese are the greatest people in the world! If there are any shortcomings of the Chinese. Let me tell you clearly: What the Chinese lack is a selfishness, a self-love, and a self that considers their physical and mental health!
Getting married in China and having children is a very tiring and troublesome thing. However, the Chinese people attach great importance to the family in their bones, and are very eager to pay for the family's children. Even though the Chinese are so strong and have the concept of patience and self-sacrifice, many people still choose not to have a second child.Many people even belong to DINK families, and many older unmarried young men and women. Why? Because of marriage, childbirth has seriously overdrawn their health and happiness. They are so tired, so tired!
The hardship of raising children is only known to parents.
When a strong mother cried all night and toilet paper was piled up on the table. Her daughter scolded her on WeChat: "I hate you crying the most. You will not be allowed to cry anymore in the future"! In fact, my mother was unable to study at ease all day because of her child’s depression. I have a stomachache today, dysmenorrhea tomorrow, an emotional outburst the day after tomorrow, and antidepressant drugs will not work. The child has problems every day, and his mother is desperately anxious. Mom wants to die but can't die; wants to live but lives very tired.
Psychology points out: The more painful people are in life, the more they will pin their hopes on their children and the relationship between husband and wife. It seems that the child is everything to her, and the relationship between husband and wife is herself. In fact, people who are truly happy have lived real, happy, and happy lives. So, I have already lived enough! Therefore, I am not afraid of other people's incomprehension of myself, and I am not afraid of birth, old age, sickness and death.
It is because the Chinese people endure humiliation and self-sacrifice at the expense of their own physical and mental health and happiness in exchange for the so-called harmonious relationship between husband and wife, in exchange for the so-called future and development of their children. It is precisely because the Chinese do not have their own physical and mental health and happiness index. Therefore, I am more eager for the understanding, support, compassion and sympathy of others. With a little bit of pity, sympathy, support, and understanding from others, we can move forward with difficulty. Their lives can no longer withstand any wind and waves. Today, some of the road rage, Internet sprays, various black powders, etc. we see are all manifestations of a complete collapse of the mentality that is pressured by the pressure of life. There is nowhere to release our pain and can only be done in this perverted way. Express.
Road rage is a social sorrow
A Chinese favorite phrase: "I am too difficult"! This sentence may have a funny element.But why does this sentence: "I am too difficult" become the most commonly used word in Chinese? Because "I'm too difficult" expresses the Chinese people's aspirations. If there is an afterlife, I will no longer be troubled by myself, no longer get married for the sake of marriage, and have children for the sake of having children.
I am a spiritual psychologist, revealing the most complex psychological phenomena and psychological laws of human beings; revealing the psychological misunderstandings of the Chinese people; alerting the Chinese people: it is not that you are not working hard enough, but that you are working too hard! You need to re-establish a relaxed and happy life concept. Psychology is the science of how to make you happy and healthy. Learning Psychology Lifelong benefits, lifelong benefits from practicing psychology! Pay attention to me, walk into me, we will live a happy, free and happy life together, soaring freely under the blue sky and white clouds like an eagle!
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