Sometimes the relationship is so strange. I didn't step early or late. I just caught up. You have to ask me why I fell in love with him. In fact, I don't know why.
In terms of figure, appearance, and economic strength, he is not charming at all, but I still fell in love with him desperately. I think maybe this is fate, it is destined by God.
Before getting along with him, I was rationally convincing myself that I am so young and in my early 20s, how can I be with an old man like him? This is completely impossible. Although I like him very much in my heart, reason has the upper hand.
When we walked by the side of Jialu River, he took my hand as we walked, my heart moved slightly, but did not refuse, I stopped by the river, looking at the golden sunset reflected in the river, The weeping willows by the river danced slightly with the wind, white swan swam freely in the water, the afterglow hit his face, he looked so charming, instantly, I fell, this environment made me Unable to hold on to himself, he hugged me from behind, I knew that from now on, I would be forever.
This is just a screenshot of the video. The beauty at the time is really beyond words.
When I woke up from my intoxication, I found that all the so-called rationality and so-called morality in the past disappeared, and everything was no better than a hug from him. I didn’t know whether it should be happy or sad. , I am happy that he and I are about to start a relationship, but sad that I know that this relationship will not have any results in the end, because I and his daughter are almost the same age.
Since we are not sure about the future, let's enjoy the present.
The real experience of a female netizen described in this article (text: okay), for the fluency of the article, the article, characters, plot, and content have been adapted.
From the moment I like you, I never thought about what I can get from you, I just saw your back, I wanted to hug you, I wanted to protect you, just watch and support, the best in my life , A few years is not bad, even a second will do, never thought of disturbing you and the superior.
His wife is on business for a period of time. These days he is at home alone and his daughter is studying abroad. So I went to his house that day. He cooked delicious meals for me. I wanted to help him, but he said that The child was used to spoil me, and was reluctant to enter the smoky kitchen, so he pushed me out of the kitchen, then closed the sliding door, and said to me: girl, just wait for the meal and watch TV.
I have to say that the old man’s cooking skills are very high and his meals are very good. After the meal, he sits on the sofa and watches TV. I lie on his lap and play on the mobile phone. I look at the door from time to time and think, if he My wife opened the door at this time and saw a young girl lying on her husband's lap. What would it be like? Will you die or die? But the psychological satisfaction at that time far exceeded the fear of reality, stimulating and excited.
The next day, I woke up in a dazed manner, together I have not yet adapted to this strange environment, as if I am in a dream, who am I, where am I, and how could I lie here, and then I wake up again in an instant, strange And warm.
He made breakfast early, then he pulled me out of bed and pushed me into the bathroom to let me wash. After washing, I wore his wide shirt and moved to the dining table with bare feet and swollen eyes, and found that he even had eggs. It's all peeled, my God! The happiness at that moment was overwhelming, and I felt surrounded by love. I even felt that I was his woman, his woman completely.
Since then, I have almost reached the point of being completely obsessed with him. It can be said that there is almost only him in my world. When you love someone too much, you start to be afraid of losing. You want to know him all the time. Whereabouts, understand the bits and pieces of his life, but he just doesn't do what you want, so you are more and more concerned about gains and losses, guessing, suspicious, and asking questions, but later you can bear it because of his hug.
The life of a third party is destined to be lonely,When he accompanies you, it is calculated in hours. Most of the time, you eat, sleep, go shopping, watch movies alone, countless late nights tossing and turning.
You are all reflecting on your behavior, regretting why you chose this path, constantly wandering between giving up and reluctant, wanting to give up.
But the next day, because of his text message that he wanted to eat with you, you were resurrected on the spot. This is the case every time, and the heart grows again and again.
People are too greedy, I just want to look at you at the beginning, and gradually deal with, share, try to restrain possessiveness, or sometimes want to possess, start to be dissatisfied, picky, want to change, want to completely assimilate, because of practical problems but But it can't be achieved.
So I started to be irritable, anxious, hysterical, when all these moral and emotional kidnappings were carried out in the name of love unknowingly.
Think about it at the beginning, I just stood in the crowd gently, expecting you to look at me gently, that's all, why did it slowly become like this? I don’t know, but that’s the truth.
Human maturity is often accompanied by a sad experience, because only after sadness can you thoroughly reflect, reflect on the past, reflect on the gains and losses, women may not be beautiful, may not be rich, may be immature, may be coquettish and self-willed, But I can’t do without self-knowledge. From the beginning, I knew the gap between myself and his wife, and I didn’t dare to intervene in his family. Lido accompanies him. On the contrary, I hope he can cherish the time he spends with me, but the simplest things are often the hardest to achieve.
Those seemingly simple eating and walking together, walking hand in hand, watching movies and blowing air, chatting and watching TV, but I can't ask for it anyway, because I am a third party and cannot be fair. Doing ordinary things between these couples or lovers can’t be ordinary things. This is the price of your being a third party. Since you have chosen to be a third party, you must bear the unhappiness brought to you by being a third party.
When we are together,He said the most: It's getting late, I should go. I hate this sentence, but there is no way for it. Is it wrong for him to return to his own family? No, since that’s right, why should I hate it? The reason for the more and more possessive.
At that time, he loved me to some extent. Even if I didn’t want to, I didn’t show it. I tried to be a well-behaved and understanding lover. I thought about his wife many times. , What I did must have hurt this woman. It was a deep guilt, but that guilt was fleeting, because I felt sorry for women who had nothing to do with me. I felt sorry for myself even more, and I always faced the darkness alone. Long night, I love others, who will love me?
He said that the first time he saw me, I liked the fleshy look. I weighed 20 pounds more than his wife. He said that I don’t need to lose weight. He said that I should eat three meals a day on time, do not stay up late, and do not put on makeup. He said Face things optimistically, be content and always happy. He said that he is the most worthy of my trust and will never deceive me. He said that with him, I don’t have to be afraid of anything. He said that he can’t speak sweet words and love me. Love depends on action. I am intoxicated in his world
I am intoxicated with love. At that time, I was full of confidence and thought I was probably one of the few happy people in this world. It's really fun to be with him, smile very heartily, he will move to my house without interruption, eat a lot of food, and take the trouble to tell me the truth of life.
I think he is my father, no no no! Better than my father!
One year after we fell in love, because the eldest aunt was late, I was pregnant after a checkup. I was still young and not married. How could I get pregnant? How can I have children? I asked him out. He sat there for a long time without speaking. I knew exactly what I should do. In fact, I couldn't welcome the child at any time, because I was not prepared at all.
I don’t know the answer, I’m paranoid and I have to wait for an answer. The answer is his attitude. Even if he says no, he can comfort me well, but he just doesn’t say it, keeps his head down and pretends Thinking about where.
In the end, I will tell him that I will deal with it.At that moment, I hated him, my heart became cold, and people could happily get crow's feet during pregnancy, but I was at a loss when I was pregnant, and I could only cry in fear. I can feel his guilt, but he and I have a rift because of this incident. Once something happens, even if you can reconcile, you will never be able to return to the previous state.
Next year I will stay in this city, stay by his side, trustworthy moments of suffering torment me, I keep jealous of him, he does not like to explain, he will always tell me that some white lies are necessary
I no longer trust him the same way I used to. I doubt his words, his smile, and his kisses. I began to be cold and violent. When I was angry, I didn’t say a word, pulled a face, and he didn’t say anything. .
So we were speechless, half an hour later, until the sentence I was gone, I didn’t want to be like this, but when I humbled him and begged him to believe me, and cried and asked him if he was leaving me, he His eyes, his expression is cold and terrible.
At this moment, I understand that I am naive. You think you understand him. In fact, you only understand his fur and his inner world. You have never been in it.
I am short of money, but I never dare to expect him to donate money generously. I am insecure, but I cannot get enough peace of mind from him. I am short of warmth and know that he will always be me. The last solace of this city.
He always said, I hope you will have a good life, and will never tire of telling me about the criteria for finding someone in the future, but he doesn’t understand. His image is deeply ingrained in my heart. Even if I meet thousands of others, it’s not as good as his Looking back, but reality is always used to face it.
Many times, even though I talk about fear of marriage, when I witness other people's happy and happy scenes, I also long for a nest that belongs to me. People who have been empty for too long are always too easy to be moved by suddenness.
Next year, I only went to work intermittently for a few months. Most of the time I slept until 11 noon. I had no goals, no ideals, no entertainment, and no social interaction, but I felt very cool perverted. .
When he doesn’t come, I don’t have to wash my face and squat at home in pajamas for a day. If he comes, I will be busy starting at 2 pm, washing my face seriously, applying a mask, drawing eyebrows, and painting Lipstick, washing clothes, mopping the floor and wiping furniture, he seems to have become all the driving force of my life.
He will not give me a lot of money, but he will take care of my food and accommodation, and occasionally take me to the supermarket for big purchases, he will lift my chin and stare at me carefully and talk about it. To see if I am beautiful, all I can see is the charm of a mature man exuded by H, which makes people want to stop. I want to leave, but always look back three times. In the end, I am still as meek as a kitten. Stay by his side.
Sometimes people are so contradictory. They want to escape, but they don't want to leave. Over the past few years, I have become accustomed to this kind of life and have his life.
I have been complaining that he spends too little time with me. At first, he often took me for walks and took me to the movies. Slowly, only dinner was left. Recently, counting back, he last time It was about half a month ago to have dinner with me
2 years ago, he said that after his daughter went to work, his wife would go to Hangzhou to accompany his daughter. We had more time, and I finally got it through. His daughter returned to work from studying abroad, but his wife chose to stay at home because she was not used to living in a rented house.
But I never waited, he said that he can spend more time with me. Calm down and think about it, no matter what I do, he will not change anything because of this. Instead of watching him hurriedly come and hurried away, it’s better to relax everyone
and let him stay with his wife at home, occasionally meet him, but also I can look forward to something because I haven't seen it for a long time, instead of laying a layer of dust on the cocoon's heart.
I’m too sensitive, glass-hearted, especially can’t stand rejection
Once, I told H to buy an Ipad. According to the usual practice, he would tease me and say: If I perform well, I will be reimbursed. Used to this kind of goodness and surprises, so I asked him in a daze: If you are in a good mood,Will you be reimbursed for me?
When he told me that the stock market was bad recently and I had no money, I didn't even know how to step down. I turned over and pretended to play on my mobile phone to resolve the embarrassment. In an instant, all kinds of spiritual chicken soup I had ever watched poured into my mind.
He started to reject me, he started to feel distressed about spending money for me, his eyes changed a bit when he saw me, and I was surprised at my own behavior. How many days have I accumulated so that I can confidently ask this In other words, at the same time, the previous inexplicable confidence was destroyed in an instant.
In this city, I have no friends, no classmates, and a barely subsistence job supports me. I see the neighbors in the next building more often than with him. I never call to ask him why I never came to see me, never murmured or even begged him to have a meal with me, never reached out for money, and never willful
but even so, I still can only look at the ceiling late at night. The chandelier waits for tears to soak the pillow, why wait for such a love? does it worth? Is it really worth it?
His daughter is about to get married. As for me, she has become an older leftover girl. He sold a few properties and bought a new house for his daughter in Hangzhou. After he was busy with his daughter’s affairs, he finally said that one weekend I was able to accompany me, but because his wife made a phone call and went to Hangzhou in a hurry. The moment I saw him buying a ticket, my emotions were completely out of control. Perhaps it was a long time of grievance and resentment. After that tear, My peace has reached a new level. I think I should try to contact men who are better than him. It doesn't matter whether I love or not, as long as it can save my loneliness.
He is very mysterious. He never tells me where he is or what he does. Even if he asks, he still never mentions it. Even so, a woman's instincts let me know what he is hiding from me. For 5 years, I use The most beautiful youth loves him wholeheartedly. It is only today that I have a tendency to regret it. I found that he lied as much as I wanted, so I could not tell the truth from the false.
This year, I learned how to cook simple dishes and got promoted, but I was always depressed. When he was there, I told him about the latest news, and he finished listening, and there was nothing left to follow. I said, I will always end the silence. I cooperated with him to laugh and speak with him. His most reaction is to laugh. I don’t know when I started, I stood in a tall building and looked down.I have the idea of jumping into the air. When holding a knife, I want to cut my own wrist. I cross the road and expect a short-eyed person to hit me. I don't want to socialize, sleep, or move. I just watched the traffic on the road until the silence was broken.
I told him: I was tired and tried countless times to change him in my own so-called methods. In the end, I had to admit that I was stupid. After he changed me, now this withdrawn personality and few words is the real me, a feeling that is burdened with too much concealment and deception, what can I talk about sincerely?
A few days ago, it was the first time I had such a fierce quarrel with him in 5 years. The reason was that I accidentally discovered that he kept the WeChat and phone numbers of his two ex-girlfriends, among his few friends. Under the circle, there are the footprints of his ex-girlfriend, both like and comment, and the words are extremely ambiguous. He forcibly explained that it is not his ex-girlfriend. The woman's intuition tells me that their relationship is not simple.
One In an instant, the little trust I had in him fell apart, and the man who vowed to me that he had no contact information secretly did not know how many disgusting things were hidden.
I am a person who can't rub the sand in my eyes. His long-term deception made me feel exhausted. After crying, I only felt that my whole person was taken away.
I woke up this morning from aches and pains, and I felt like I was left behind. I don’t need to say a lot of separation, and I don’t need to bother to delete any WeChat phone calls. The deepest indifference is ignorance.
In the past month, the few meetings with him ended up in quarrels. Every time it became fierce, it was nothing more than the sharp contradiction. I didn’t want to see him because I was very calm inside. Once I met, watch With his unreasonable expression of doing wrong things for granted, my emotions are not artificially controllable at all, and I have said so many unpleasant things.
But he will always only have one sentence "What the hell do you want me to do?"
I see his eyes are like watching a joke,As for him, there is only impatient and disgust in his eyes. I don't understand why these two people are still struggling with each other.
He knows that I have no trust in him, but he still talks to me endlessly. In fact, my love for him has been consumed by him for most of the time, but it is only a lie to myself that I will never look back. My heart is nothing more than
When he does not show up for a few days, there is a hint of happiness in my heart. I start to reply to him often with "oh". Although the words are simple, they contain all the emotions I want to say and not want to say
me I even hope that he will never show up, and my peaceful life does not want to be disturbed by anyone.
The only thing I can't give up is his sad eyes and bewildered look. Maybe we owed each other in the last life.
Nowadays, all kinds of debts are repaid
It has been 5 years, even if I make up my mind before, it is just a test.
Now, I have planned everything without mentioning that I am going to go. , He said: You have changed too much, I have changed, become very selfish, once gave him the trust of closing his eyes and covering his ears.
Nowadays, all kinds of things are full of chills. He feels that I am making a fuss, making trouble without reason, and making things out of nothing, nothing more, just treat it as my last struggle.
He doesn't understand me, he doesn't understand at all, maybe, he has never really moved his heart, he doesn't understand the selfishness of feelings, and he played games behind him when I was about to suffocate.
At that moment, I strengthened my determination
Goodbye, five years of youth, goodbye, five years of love.
I chose to go, maybe he is worried and doesn’t know how to deal with our relationship, I chose to go, it fits his mind, he did not stay, just after a pretentious performance, he received his After my wife called,Went out.
I don't expect you to understand me, I just hope you can understand my sadness someday.
Goodbye, my former lover.
Goodbye, the man who hurt me.
Time passes day after day, and occasionally, I still think of you, the moment you once loved me, the way you love me, but there is no urge to contact you!
Those years of counting the days have finally left me, time is the deep ocean, and many grudges and grievances sink into the bottom of the sea with the passing of fate! Your unfeelingness has wiped out my last expectation of you.
I am fine now, hope you are too!
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