01
The mental state of the obedient and sensible child
Be good, obedient!
Is a child a good child? The standard is probably that he does not listen to the parents!
is a good boy who is obedient, and will be praised, affirmed, and even rewarded; if
is not obedient, he will be labeled as a bad boy, ignorant, unfilial, etc., and even get scolded and beaten.
If a child is not only obedient and sensible, he can in turn take care of his parents, soothe their anxiety, ease their conflicts, make them happy, think for their parents, and even sacrifice themselves, that will be the most touching scene in the world!
A child who was supposed to be coquettish, naughty, playful, and playful. The parents managed to train him to be well-behaved and sensible;
For example, he does his homework seriously every day after school, he helps with housework, he doesn’t play mobile phones, he It will calm the parents' emotions in time;
or a child is required to work hard to fulfill the parents' unfulfilled wishes, not their own wishes! What is
this obedient and sensible child thinking? What is his mental state? do you know?
is nothing more than the following points:
1, in order to make parents like yourself, so that the parents are not angry, suppress yourself, soothe your parents, and obey the arrangements of your parents is good;
2, if you give up your own ideas and obey your parents' opinions, you can There is nothing wrong with avoiding physical suffering or mental torture!
3. I can't be too selfish. I have to work hard for the expectations of my parents. My own ideas are not important and can be discarded. My parents' ideas are the most important!
4. I don’t know what I want. My thoughts are not important at all. Anyway, I can’t be the master. Just let my parents arrange it!
5. Let my next generation complete my life's wishes. I must first complete the wishes of my parents!
02
They can’t be their own children.
The obedient and sensible children have lost their own opinions when they were young or they have given up their opinions;
The obedient and sensible children live to make their parents see themselves pleasing;
, they live. In order to take care of their parents' emotions, their own emotions, their own needs, and their own opinions are not worth paying attention to;
they just can't be their own children!
A person who can't live or be himself, as time goes by, he can't find himself more and more, and he has no interest in anything, because they have long forgotten what they like!
They will feel that they are less and less happy, and they don't know how to make themselves happy or even depressed! And their parents are getting more temperamental as they get older!
Parents, is such a child the one you want?
03
When they grow up, their aspirations
sensible children always put the needs and expectations of their parents and family members first;
they even inverted the parent-child relationship, and they became children who take care of their parents!
They will face many problems when they grow up, such as:
1, losing themselves, disliking anything, disinterested, unhappy, or even depressed;
2, forming a pleasing personality or becoming a good person or a bad person;
3, being unable to be intimate The parents or one of their parents are separated and they will be depressed once they leave;
4. There are problems in dating and marriage, such as Mabao men and Mabao women, frequently changing partners;
5, one’s own life wishes can be fulfilled by the next generation, passed on from generation to generation ; Z2z
A rich second generation frequently changed girlfriends, unable to control himself, because his father cheated when he was a child, his mother was anxious, depressed, unhappy, he assumed the responsibility of his father, and every time he saw his mother unhappy, he would be a poor substitute for father , Make mom happy! Only when his mother is happy can his mood improve!
After adulthood, he was always attracted to unhappy girls, he went to fall in love with them, and couldn't help making them happy. When the girls were happy, he immediately lost interest and ended his relationship until he saw the next one. The unhappy girl, so repetitive, can't help herself!
An adult man finds himself moreHe became more uncomfortable and even depressed, because he was very sensible and obedient since he was a child, obeyed his parents, took care of his parents, and put his parents’ family needs first, but now he feels more and more meaningless to live. Once he stops, he does not take care of his parents. The needs of family members will turn into disobedient children, and they will face all kinds of accusations, and when they are sick and need someone to take care of them, there is no one! Despair!
04
What should parents do right?
Parents must see that they see their children, and parents must understand that everyone has to live on their own to be happy and complete!
Parents must first care for themselves, be themselves, do not impose the task of running a family atmosphere on their children, and do not impose their own life vision on their children to achieve!
Parents must first take care of themselves, find their hobbies, maintain their health, and find their natural vocations. Only then will there be a positive family atmosphere!
In the family atmosphere, form an equal and peaceful family atmosphere, accept children's natural types, tolerate children's life rhythm, support children's natural interests, cultivate children's talents, and let children find themselves and live themselves!
