Hello everyone, I am family education instructor Guo Mom ~
What do you understand by "high IQ"? Is
good? Can
solve complex puzzles?
expresses very clearly, leaving others speechless?
As children grow up, we can judge whether a child has a high IQ based on the child's grades, expression, thinking, etc. So how should we judge when our children are still young? Or in other words, which behaviors of children when they were young were clearly manifestations of high IQ, but parents mistakenly regarded them as "bad habits"?
Rousseau once said: Respect children and do not rush to judge him as good or bad.
If a child has these three "bad habits", it may be a sign of high IQ. Parents should not stop them.
Manifestation 1: Little "talkative"
When the child is young, we always hope that the child will call mom and dad and speak early;
When the child grows up, we always hope that the child will shut up quickly, which is really annoying.
From the perspective of developmental psychology , children's language development is divided into three stages, namely: language perception stage, brain language stage, and language expression stage.
In the language experience stage, the child transmits language to the auditory center of the cerebral cortex through the auditory system, and processes and recombines the content information;
In the brain language stage, the brain reorganizes language to form text symbols and concepts.
In the language expression stage, children will convert language signals into spoken and written language and express them.
Therefore, for children, only the first two stages are definitely not conducive to language development. Although the child is a "little chatterbox", he is constantly expressing. To express, you need to use your brain, which is conducive to the improvement of IQ.
There is a very famous " Wechsler Intelligence Scale " , which divides intelligence into two parts, one is verbal IQ and the other is operational IQ . The performance of the two in intelligence is equally important.
Therefore, if there is a "little chatterbox" in the family, don't always dislike the child and tell the child to shut up, but guide the child correctly.
First of all, let the "little chatterbox" pay attention to the occasion when speaking.
I have seen some children who are chatty and talk non-stop at the dinner table. Sometimes the children don't care when the adults talk, and they just say what they want.
Parents should guide their children. Talkativeness and interjection are two different things.
Therefore, instead of stopping their children from talking, parents should teach their children when it is not appropriate to speak and to wait before speaking.
makes your child a polite chatterbox.
Secondly, turn "talkative" into "effective communication"
Some children chatter for a long time, and parents don't know what the children are saying, or the children keep chattering and parents choose to ignore it.
No matter which one it is, it belongs to "invalid communication".
If you want to "communicate effectively", you must first understand what the child is saying, and then communicate with the child correctly.
When children speak and express, their brains are actually constantly organizing language. Not all children can organize themselves smoothly, or express the whole story clearly. At this time, parents need to guide their children on how to "nag".
If there are questions mixed with the child's nagging, parents should not ignore it, but work with the child to find the answer.
In short, an "effective communication" allows parents to clearly understand their children and their children's needs can be met. This is of great significance to the establishment of parent-child relationships and the healthy psychological growth of children.
Performance 2: Loves to "imitate"
A friend's 2-year-old daughter has recently become a "little hunchback". For this reason, the daughter is often scolded by her mother. But her daughter didn't change at all. Her friend asked Guo's mother for help, what should she do?Guo’s mother asked: Is there anyone with a hunchback in the family?
My friend then remembered that he took his daughter back to his hometown, and his next door neighbor was a 93-year-old man. As he got older, he often came out to bask in the sun during the day when the sun was good. However, the old man's back is a little hunched and he walks a little slowly.
The child is just imitating the old man's walk.
When children are young, they like to imitate very much. They imitate adults in sweeping the floor, cooking, talking, walking, drinking, eating, etc.
The famous pragmatist educator Dewey once said: Education is life.
Why?
Because children observe life carefully and then imitate everything. , especially parents, is what children imitate the most.
When a child imitates, he needs to use his brain, and even needs to cooperate with his body and practice repeatedly to achieve the look he wants to imitate.
The stronger the imitation ability, the better the child's memory and higher IQ.
Therefore, when children imitate, instead of blaming their children, parents should think about how to guide their children to imitate correct and good things, and what kind of life parents should present for their children to imitate.
Performance 3: No “long ears”
Do you have a child like this: No matter how you scream, you can’t hear him!
The old mother once thought that the child had no ears and was deliberately neglecting her.
But in fact, what the old mother gained may be a baby with "super strong concentration"! Of course, is limited to children's reading, playing educational games and other things that require concentration, rather than watching TV or playing electronic products.
Let’s talk about an example around us.
There was a boy in the village who was very naughty. Every time his mother called him to go home for dinner, he couldn't hear him. Then people in the village said that this child would never achieve anything in the future because he didn’t even have ears.
But the mother did not blame the boy. Instead, she walked to the boy and told him that it was time to eat and whether he should continue playing or heat his rice in the pot. Under normal circumstances, children choose the hot pot.
Mom said: He won’t be hungry. If he wants to play, he can play. Children who can play are smart.
Later, when he went to school, this boy was still very naughty, but he was very focused on everything he did, even homework that many children didn't like. I haven’t finished the homework I arranged, and I haven’t gone to eat. It’s useless no matter who yells.
In the end, the boy was admitted to Tsinghua University , a Tsinghua student who walked out of the countryside. The current work is also beyond the reach of ordinary people.
The nature of children is to play, and the essence of concentration is to ignore what is happening outside the window. If parents do not hear when their children are playing building blocks, chess, puzzles, reading picture books, etc., it means that the child's attention is highly concentrated at this time.
Wang Yangming said in " Biography and Practice Records ": There is a kind of person who is very busy and tired every day, but in the end accomplishes nothing. How to solve
? Wang Yangming's method is "the power of precision". What is the meaning of
?
here requires a person to focus on the present.
For younger children, the most important thing for them at the moment is "playing". Therefore, only by focusing on playing will children have the possibility to focus on learning, focusing on a certain interest, focusing on a certain field, etc. in the future.
The famous American writer Og Mandino once said: Only those who do one thing at a time will be ahead of the world.
Therefore, when children focus on playing, reading, or focusing on one thing, what parents have to do is not to blame their children for "not having long ears," but to "stop disturbing them."
A child who knows how to focus can go further in the future.
message
Behind every "little problem" of children, there is a reason.Some are due to high IQ, and some are due to the lack of family education and . As parents, what we have to do is not to catch the "little problems", but the "roots" behind the "little problems". Only by finding the "roots" can parents truly "teach their children in accordance with their aptitude"!
