My daughter's words left my father speechless and could only keep apologizing to her. Between the lines, there was a guilt from the old father, as if he was really too incompetent to make the child so embarrassed. No matter how my father persuaded me, my daughter always acted like a "breaking pot" and looked very angry.
The words of passers-by make the girl feel guilty
Aunt Wang: Child, your mood and behavior have also happened when I was a child. But now, just wants to tell you: cherish the good deeds of your father to you, and there are many difficulties he has. When you become a parent in the future, you will understand his difficulties. No parent does not love his children.
Uncle Li: Daughter, hurry up and go home with your father. He is not embarrassed to ride a bicycle. Only those who make money by his own labor are worthy of respect. Many people want their father to ride a bicycle to pick him up and drop him off, but they no longer have the chance. Don’t let yourself regret it.
Listening to the persuasion of people around him, the daughter examined her father for the first time. It turned out that he was no longer young. Time made his hair whiter and his face was full of wrinkles. Before this, the girl just thought about asking for it and felt that her father should love her unconditionally and satisfy all her wishes.
But at this moment, she suddenly felt that her father was great, so what if he was riding a bicycle, he was still so tall in the crowd. Although the external material conditions are not very good, my father can pick him up and drop him off on time every day, which is the greatest happiness.
Where does the child’s vanity come from?
The reason why girls have such behaviors is caused by vanity. As parents, they do their best to give their children the best life, not only in terms of material satisfaction, but also in terms of life, companionship and education.
Although he worked so hard, he still couldn't suppress his child's vanity. Parents want to know: Where does the increasingly inflated vanity come from?
1. Parents’ oversatisfaction
It is no exaggeration to say: Children with inflated vanity have overspoken parents behind them. Parents have never thought of refusing their requests, and even if they are outside their own abilities, they will find ways to satisfy them; even if the requests are a bit too much, parents cannot bear to refuse them.
It is precisely because of this oversatisfied attitude that encourages children's vanity, because people's desires are all bottomless. Especially material satisfaction is the most likely to make children expand and thus develop a comparative mentality.
2. Want to get attention
Some parents are busy with work and making money. They always feel that providing children with material life is a manifestation of loving them, but they ignore psychological education and companionship, and even do not pay attention to their children's movements in time. Perhaps it is because of too little attention that the child wants to attract the attention of his parents through vanity.
When they see people around them with beautiful clothes and beautiful shoes, their children will feel inexplicably sad and feel that they are not loved by their parents. Gradually, their psychology will become distorted and breed a comparison mentality.
3. Don’t develop the correct values
Don’t always dislike your children like to compare. They are all microcosms of their parents. It is very likely that the habit of comparison comes from the influence of their parents. Before this, children did not establish a correct view of money and values, and they had no concept of money.
In the child's cognition, parents will give what they want and will never be rejected. Even the child will use material to measure how much love his parents love her!
Don’t want your children to be destroyed by vanity, what should parents do?
First of all, let children understand the difficulty of life. Only by truly understanding the difficulties of life can we understand parents and let children know that making money is difficult from an early age, and it is really necessary to learn to consume reasonably. I especially agree with the way to make money by working hard, so that he knows that every penny is earned through hard work.
Secondly, we must establish good values. The reflection of children's values is not only reflected in consumption, but also in life and career values. In short, only correct values can enable children to work hard in their future lives, rather than taking shortcuts.
Finally, reasonably meet psychological needs. The child’s wishes must be met, but the premise is that the needs must be reasonable. Appropriate vanity can inspire the inner driving force of a child and make him continue to work hard. The key to the problem lies in how parents guide them, and they should use vanity in other aspects rather than material things.
is written at the end: The child's life has just begun. If he falls into vanity and comparison from the beginning, his future may also be ruined. Being a smart parent, learning to refuse and learning to delay is the best way to raise children.
