text | Jingma
When a child is born, it is a piece of white paper, and it should be done by the parents!
The child’s personality is born, but acquired education has a great impact on the child!
Jing's aunt is 10 years older than Jing's father and got married earlier, so my aunt's grandson Xiaowu and Jing's mother are the same age. When I was a child, I often played with my cousin Xiaowu when I went to my aunt's house to play.
What impressed me deeply is that The eldest cousin often scolds the cousin, saying that he is disobedient and that he is unpromising.
I still remember that when I was a child, I especially liked to dissect frogs. After I caught the frog, I peeled the frog's skin and dissected the belly with a knife, but I felt it was very cruel!
Later, after I learned psychology, I realized that my cousin Xiaowu liked to dissect these small animals. It was very likely that His mother often scolded him, and he couldn't vent his inner pressure, so he turned to abuse these small animals.
Later, when my cousin grew up, he went to work in the factory. Because he worked diligently and also became the supervisor, and he didn't spend much money on his usual care. Later, he saved money to buy a house in the county town.
, but he never found a girlfriend because he was too timid. His cousin introduced him to no less than 20 girls on blind dates, but these girls were unwilling to speak when they saw their cousin and didn't know what he meant, so in the end, they all ended up in .
Xiaowu said that he felt inferior and was not worthy of the girl!
I think everything should be caused by his cousin's wife who was a child, which often scolded him, which led to his insecurity and his inferiority complex.
Parents often do these 7 things, and it is easy to raise children with inferiority complex, so hurry up and stop
item 1: I don’t hold my children often when I was a child
Some parents are worried that their children will spoil their children often and it will be difficult to take care of their children in the future.
In fact, it is not too much for children to spoil them between 6 months.
So parents often hold their children when they are young, so that they can feel that the world is warm, love them, and it is not scary.
If the child cries and doesn’t hold him when he is young, it will lead to the child’s insecurity and will easily feel inferior when he grows up.
item 2: Children often stay at home
We people are social creatures, so we need to be with people. If we stay at home often and are not with people, this person will not know how to communicate with others.
Over time, loses the ability to socialize . When you see people again, you will feel scared and feel inferior.
So after the child reaches one year old, he should take his children out often, and let his children play with other children more often, so that he can enhance his confidence.
item 3: Criticism
The so-called "Criticism" means that the child does something wrong and says, "You are always like this, you are always like that" and like turning over old accounts, and he will say, " Why are you so stupid? You will definitely have no future in the future."
and other words that are very depressing to children may be a catchphrase in the eyes of parents, but they will take it seriously for children.
The child doesn’t know what the truth is and what the lies are. If the parents always say that he is stupid, he will feel that he is definitely stupid. If the mother always says that he is not promising in the future, then he will definitely be unpromising in the future.
Children who are often hit by parents are difficult to be confident and are generally very inferior.
The fourth item: Threat the child
"If you don't obey, I won't want you anymore"!
"If you don't do well in the exam, I don't like you, but if you do well in the exam, I like you"!
Parents’ love should be unconditional, If parents’ love always carries one or another conditions, this will make the child very frightened.
Although the child does look obedient on the surface, the child does not recognize him in his heart. He believes that only when he is good at the exam can his mother like him. Only when he is obedient and well-behaved is his mother's child, otherwise the mother will not recognize him. Children like
are also very inferior.
Please 5: Parents with strong desire to control
Let their children go east but not west. The common catchphrase is: "Will I harm you if I give birth to you? I am your mother, whatever I say is what I say."
You cannot force our child because we have children. Children are our appendix . Children just come to this world through us. They have their own mission and tasks. They cannot force our expectations or things we think are good to them on the child. It is difficult for children like
to be independent. Children who have no way to be independent will find that they are inferior to others when they go to society and will easily become inferior.
Part 6: Parents often quarrel
A family stability is very important for children. If parents often quarrel, the children will feel that it must be because of me, because my birth will cause parents to quarrel frequently. Children like
will also be very inferior. As parents, try to avoid in front of their children, and quarrel is not a solution to the problem.
Please 7: Always praise other people’s children
Other people’s children do better than you do! Other people's children read English better than you! Other people’s children eat faster than you! Other people's children are taller than you.
Parents always say that other people’s children are good in front of their children, which will lead to their children’s inferiority complex and feel that they are not good and that will affect their children’s sense of security and lead to their children’s inferiority complex.
A child with inferiority complex will find it difficult for him to solve problems by himself in his studies and work. He is prone to retreat when encountering problems, and it is also difficult to have strong execution ability.
These children will find it difficult to achieve good results when they grow up, and they will even resent their parents when they grow up, thinking that because of improper education of their parents, they will be in a downturn today and easily become ungrateful.
So as parents, when educating their children, they must pay attention to avoiding the above 7 things in order to raise a confident child with a sense of security.
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