Original | Pregnancy
Lin Chiling has finally made a comeback!
This time, Lin Chiling mainly promoted her new book back home. She was wearing a white dress and long hair draped over her shoulders, very gentle.
Pregnancy Mom thinks it is really good to have such a state 10 months after giving birth, but Lin Chiling has been mocked a lot of mocking:
"Aunt Lin!"
"The eye socket is sunken, the nasolabial folds are obvious, like a young and kind grandma!"
"The eyes are gone, I am really aged a lot."
These people really don't know how tired it is to have children and take care of children!
This time, Lin Chi-ling revealed that she would temporarily live in Taiwan, which also means separation from her husband.
Many people speculated that Lin Chiling was divorced?
You know that after three years of marriage, Lin Chiling has been frequently reported to have divorced, cheated, and domestic violence...
There are even rumors online that Kurosawa Ryohei has a tendency to abuse , and Lin Chiling was beaten and admitted to the hospital.
Before Lin Chiling came back, none of these messages were confirmed, and she herself did not respond.
This time, when faced with doubts, Lin Chiling responded gently and firmly as always: separation is to take care of her elderly mother, and the relationship between husband and wife has always been very good.
Lin Chiling laughed at the outside world: I don’t read the social media messages very much. I think that if I participate in the online world, I will forget to get along with people around me. I don’t care what people who have never met in my life say!
Even though the comments from the outside world were full of maliciousness, Lin Chi-ling was not affected at all, but when talking about the identities of the child and mother, she couldn't help but burst into tears. Lin Chiling in the impression of
has always been elegant and decent, but the change after becoming a mother is: is so sloppy that she doesn’t want to be recognized!
Because of her age, she worked hard more than ten times before she successfully got pregnant. It has been hard for her to get pregnant, but the hardships she has worked hard after becoming a mother are even more indescribable.
In the few months when the baby was born, she had no way to sleep for a whole sleep. She had to get up every night to feed the child night milk and change the diapers.
and other children are older, and they are completely unable to take off their hands. They just need their mother to hold their baby anytime and anywhere, so she often holds the baby with vegetables in one hand. Even if the summer in Tokyo is hot to 40 degrees, the child will stick to the mother. She said: is really inelegant, so sloppy that she is afraid of being recognized.
Due to long-term lack of sleep, the hardships of parenting, identity changes, and body distortion, Lin Chi-ling suffered from depression .
Lin Chiling said: It turns out that I will really feel depressed after giving birth!
Fortunately, with her husband's company and joint efforts, she survived that difficult time!
Finally, Lin Chiling also reminded the mothers: Moms must not fight alone, a powerful teammate is really important!
Yes, every new mother will spend a difficult time, will be anxious, uneasy, and depressed. At this time, the participation of her partner is really important!
①
In every 3 mothers, there is a mother who will experience postpartum depression !
Postpartum is the time when women are most vulnerable and are also the time when they are most likely to be depressed.
Mothers who have given birth know that postpartum depression is really too common.
The changes brought to a woman by pregnancy and childbirth are really earth-shaking, both physically and psychologically.
Xie Na After giving birth to the second child, she fell into depression for a while. Sometimes she wanted to cry for a little...
Olympic champion Liu Xuan . Because of postpartum depression, her son became irritable as soon as she cried, and wanted to escape...
Yen Yuen also revealed on the show that she suffered from postpartum depression. When her mother came back from buying vegetables, she felt that her mother was too hard and wanted to cry; her husband would also want to cry if she said something casually.
During that time, she was originally careless and was on the verge of collapse every day, and could only use crying to release her emotions.
Celebrity mothers are even more so, ordinary mothers.
A mother said: The collapse of being a mother was hidden in the middle of the night. Before giving birth, she experienced 10 months of pregnancy, contractions, and the tenth level of labor pain and tear before giving birth.
I originally thought that confinement was for enjoying happiness and health, eating confinement meals, enjoying the care of my family, and someone helped to see the children.
But after I really gave birth, I realized that the person who was the most tired in the 3rd month of confinement is still himself.
The sky is 2, 3, 4, 5, and 6 am, and I have seen it all.
Because I am a mother, I should have milked my child sleepyly, changed my diapers, and coaxed my child day and night.
also have to endure elbows, waist and back discomfort, tolerate fragmented routines and heart-wrenching children's crying anytime and anywhere.
In such a tired state, mothers really can't escape alone.
A while ago, there was a video of pregnancy and my mother was very worried about watching it.
A mother is alone at home to take care of her children, but no matter what she does, the child follows her like a little tail, going to the bathroom, cooking, and holding the child wherever she goes.
finally fell asleep. As soon as my mother left, she woke up. She was clingy. Her mother had discomfort during her period and couldn't eat for a day. She completely collapsed and couldn't help but yell.
The child was so scared that he cried loudly. Although he was pushed away by his mother, he still kept coming forward to try to hug his mother tightly.
She immediately regretted that the child was so young, but she had to bear her bad temper. She felt unhappy after hitting herself several times.
Only those who have experienced this kind of collapse really understand. Children only have mothers in their eyes. Which mother is willing to yell at such a child? But she was really tired at that moment! Many mothers have experienced such crashes as
such crashes. They heal themselves every day in the crash, and then collapse in the self-healing...
②
The most terrifying thing after giving birth is
"When I was depressed, the people around me said I was mentally ill!"
"New Mom Emotion Blue Book" points out:
has greater than 40% of new mothers have been said by their family because of postpartum depression, "It's too pretentious and I don't know how to be blessed"!
There was a very popular video on the Internet before, in which several mothers talked about their postpartum depression.
A postpartum depressed wife said: I have never been very happy since I gave birth, to be honest.
The husband said: I don’t think you have postpartum depression, you just get out of control.
Another mother said: I am very sick, but because I have no cough and no runny nose, no one in the family knows that I am sick, and they don’t think I am sick.
There are even people who say: There is no postpartum depression at all, it is just made up by the Internet, and women are too fussy!
That's right, what's more terrifying than depression is that you are exhausted by torture, but no one empathizes with it, and even think that postpartum depression is pretentious.
And the neglect of postpartum depression will really put them on the verge of collapse in a desperate situation.
A 37-year-old mother in Changsha, Hunan committed suicide by jumping off the building with her 5-month-old daughter due to postpartum depression.
A mother in Shandong strangled her 4-year-old son to death due to postpartum depression, and then killed herself with a knife...
A second child mother in Jinhua, Zhejiang Province, jumped from a tall building with her daughter who was less than a month old due to postpartum depression...
After these tragedies, her family regretted: she knew she had postpartum depression, but she didn't expect it to be so serious!
If you notice something wrong with them earlier, your family can give you more company and support, and the tragedy can be avoided.
Because many mothers have been depressed by their family and friends, as long as they are faced with their postpartum depression, it is not a disaster.
Supermodel Xi Mengyao also experienced postpartum depression after giving birth. Because of her husband's spoiled and companionship, and because of her friend's guidance and support, her negative emotions found a vent, and finally got out of the haze of postpartum depression.
Qin Hailu , who gave birth to a 9 kilogram of hereditary giant baby, also experienced severe depression after giving birth. The child cried, and she cried too. Later, it was his husband who supported her and asked her to go to work quickly, so she got out of depression.
Postpartum depression is common, but as long as the sunlight in life can shine into the hearts of mothers, she can get out!
③
Self-rescue and being rescued
is the best way out of depression!
Every family of a woman should know that postpartum depression cannot be completely defeated by women based on their personal beliefs.
Focus on postpartum depression, which is to focus on one life!
On Zhihu, under the topic of postpartum depression, a mother said this:
When I just gave birth, I didn't speak all day and kept crying. My husband asked me what I cried, and I said I didn't know, just want to cry. My husband went to the hospital for consultation. The doctor said it was postpartum depression , so he should care more about the mother. My husband was scared to death. He didn't even dare to go to work when he got home. He helped me see the child at home and chatted with me. It got better slowly. Now I think about it.
Only by knowing your emotions and asking your family for help in time can you get rid of the dilemma of depression.
1. Self-rescue-Don't force yourself to be a 100-point mother
① Don't demand perfection. No one can be a perfect mother. Don’t have too high requirements for yourself. Reducing psychological expectations can reduce some burden.
②Distorize attention. Don’t always focus on bad things, pay more attention to happy things, or things you like. Communicate with people more and develop some hobbies.
Relax appropriately. Care for children is a physical job, and children's sleep is irregular, so when children rest, they should try their best to rest and adjust their life content appropriately.
④ Take the initiative to ask for help. When you feel helpless and emotionally collapsed, you can confide in your partner, best friend, and parents, seek help, and don’t always bear it yourself.
2. Rescued - Support and encouragement of husband and family
① Timely communication and communication . Learn more about the inner pain of postpartum mothers, and upgrade from a little girl to a mother. Sometimes the transformation of this role will sometimes have a certain impact on the mother's emotions. The gap in the heart needs someone to help, especially the husband.
② Understand mother's mentality and agree with mother's feelings. If your family finds that your mother is in a bad mood, you should empathize and give full understanding, instead of blaming your mother for being too fragile and sensitive. As Xie Yilin said, when taking care of your baby until her soul is out of body, you really need to have enough love from your husband to be full of energy again.
③ Give postpartum mothers more company. allows her to feel the warmth and care from her family at all times. She hugs her when she is tired, and coaxes her when her child cries, making her feel that she is not alone.
④ The husband should take care of the children more and take on the task of cleaning housework. Actively soak milk at night to change diapers, so that she can have plenty of time to rest and relax herself.
For many mothers, the company and understanding from their families are a kind of healing, which can make mothers feel the sunshine from their families, and help them relieve depression faster.
. Evaluate dangerous emotions
If mothers find that they have postpartum depression, they must evaluate their depression state.
There is a normal postpartum depression. Because of hormones, it is normal to experience anxiety, fatigue and mood swings during confinement.
There were not many mothers who had never cried and made a fuss, but afterwards, they all felt strange. Why are they so excited?
is really not pretentious. It took a full 10 months to get pregnant, estrogen and progesterone increased by 10 times, and it took only 72 hours to fall back to the pre-pregnancy state after giving birth. No one can stand it!
This kind of depression can usually be slowly self-regulated and gradually disappear after confinement. Most postpartum mothers have postpartum depression and have not risen to the point of disease. As long as the family, especially the husband, are around you at this time, they will be accompanied and taken care of by the mother in a timely manner.
Another type is severe postpartum depression. Insomnia, severe mood swings, strong irritability, difficulty in intimate contact with the baby, loss of appetite, and suicide thoughts will occur.
These symptoms may last for several months. This situation requires special attention. If the effect of asking for help from your family is not good, you must see a psychologist.
If mothers still cannot distinguish whether they are depressed or depressed, you can refer to the following picture:
Swipe up and down to view the full text
(The picture comes from WeChat public account: Xinqing Clinic)
Finally, I want to say to all mothers:
Before learning to love children, please learn to cherish yourself!
Put down too high self-requirements and treat yourself gently!
When encountering difficulties, seek help from your family. Never hold on by yourself!
If you don’t have the luck to meet a good mother-in-law, keep a distance from her mother-in-law.
Eat well, sleep well, see a doctor if you have any diseases. Having a good body is more important than anything else!
I also hope that every husband can give his wife more considerate and love!
Accompanies her, encourages her, supports her, understands her...try to share everything about her!
Hot TopicsClick the blue word to jump
