When eating, the child put the rice in the bowl, looked at the rice in the bowl and sighed, saying: "Hey, I can't eat anymore." I thought in confusion, I haven't started eating yet, why can't I eat anymore? The grandma said loudly: "I ate the sesame cakes bought by my playmate's grandma. I told you not to ask for other people's things, but you just didn't listen!"
The child pursed his lips and explained: "I told my playmate's grandma, I don't want to eat it, but she insists on buying it for me." Grandma's voice became louder and louder: "If I want to buy it for you, you can't take it! It's not the time for my playmate grandma to buy it, so you stand by and watch. If you don't leave, Her grandma is too embarrassed not to buy it, so of course she will buy it for you! You should follow grandpa home as soon as possible after school!"
The child's eyes were red and his voice became louder: "It's because grandpa went to pick up the car across the street. Wait for grandpa on this side of the road. Otherwise, if I come back by myself, what should I do if grandpa can't find me? " I asked the child in a steady voice: "Did grandpa park the car across the road?" The child nodded.
Grandma asked grandpa: "Why do you always let others pick up the child? Why did you go?" Grandpa explained: "I didn't ask anyone else to pick up the child, it was..." Grandma interrupted him: "You It’s always like this. Others are bringing their children and they must buy food. I’m sorry if I don’t buy it.” Grandpa waved his hand and said, “Can you pick it up next time? You’ll know after you go and experience it.”
Grandma changed her tone of voice. He hurriedly said to the child: "Then you can't ask for other people's things! We have told you since you were a child that you are not allowed to ask for other people's things! It's not like we don't have anything at home." The child burst into tears and defended loudly: "I I told her that her grandma insisted on buying it, and I told her that I wasn’t hungry at all and didn’t want to eat. But her grandma still wanted to buy it for me. What can I do?”
Grandma continued to say, I said to her gently Said: "Okay, please keep your voice down. The child also said she didn't want to eat. She didn't mean to ask for food from others. It was her playmate grandma who was too enthusiastic." Grandma said loudly: "This is a bad habit. Others give me food." You have to refuse too!"
I said: " Some very enthusiastic people are difficult to refuse, haven't you ever encountered it? " Grandma said: "Others always buy things for their children to eat, which adds burden to others. I'm sorry! How can this be like this!"
I said: "Now is different from the past. We were poor before and valued one dollar or two very seriously. We really shouldn't cause trouble to others. Now everyone My living conditions have improved. This time I invited my playmate, grandma. Can we invite her next time? And a sesame seed cake only costs two or three yuan, maybe five yuan at most? Next time we invite her and return it to her playmate. That’s it.”
Grandma wanted to say something, but she opened her mouth and closed it again. I touched the child's back and said, "I know you wanted to reject your playmate grandma, but you failed. Right?" The child wiped his tears and lowered his head. I said: " But you have eaten everything, and you have to listen when grandma criticizes you. " The child looked up at me.
I said: "You did eat it. I didn't accuse you wrongly, did I?" Grandma said loudly and accusingly: "She couldn't finish the meal, so she brought back half of it. Grandpa and I finished the food separately." He said to grandma: "Yes, I will tell her what she did wrong. But can you speak in a lower voice?" Grandma still wanted to say, but grandpa pulled grandma with his hand and they left the table.
I whispered to the child: "I have also met very enthusiastic people, so enthusiastic that you can't refuse. It is really difficult to refuse." The child said sadly: "I told you I don't want to eat, playmate." Grandma must make me eat it."
I said: "If we divide people into many categories, my playmate grandma is a very enthusiastic type of person. Does she always praise you every time she sees you and say you did a good job? The child thought for a moment, nodded and said, "Grandpa is also a very enthusiastic person.""
I smiled and said, "I don't think so. Grandpa and my playmate grandma are a little different. Grandpa will not force people, but you have to find a reason to convince grandpa. Once grandpa understands it, he will understand you and will not force you. "The child agreed with me.
I said: "By the way, don't you think the playmate's father and grandmother are the same kind of people? They are all super passionate people. The last time you went to play at your playmate's house, your playmate's father made sure to keep you and not let you go. The child recalled it and said, "Yes, I said I wanted to tell my grandpa, but my playmate's father didn't listen and wouldn't let me go." "
I said: "Yes, their family are all very enthusiastic people, they don't have any bad intentions, but it makes you uncomfortable. "The child pouted. I said: "You are still young, and you don't know how to refuse when you meet enthusiastic people. You have to observe in life and sum up experience . And everyone is different. For example, why are you willing to listen to what I say? For example, why does grandpa laugh when you say something, but grandma doesn’t? "
The child said: "Because grandma has no sense of humor. I said, "It's because grandma doesn't think it's funny." Sometimes grandma smiles happily, right? Notice what makes her happy. "The child was thinking.
I said: "For example, when you meet a passionate person who wants to buy you food. The first answer is, I don’t want to eat it. The second answer is that my stomach is very full and will burst if I eat any more. Which one do you think will be successful? The child said: "I don't want to eat it, no, I choose the second option!" "
I said: "Yes. The first is your idea. A passionate person will think that you are being polite to her, and will definitely buy it for you. Aren’t Chinese people very polite and face-saving? "The child nodded.
I said: "The second is the actual situation. Taking your body as the starting point, the success rate is much higher. For example, if you are allergic to milk, others insist that you drink milk. If you use the excuse that you don't want to drink, others will think that you are trying to be polite to her by not giving her face. If you tell the reality of a milk allergy, others will understand. There are also people who are allergic to alcohol, have gastritis, and cannot eat spicy food, etc. "The child smiled and nodded.
I said: "But you have to say it well. You can't shout loudly with grandma like you just did, because it will start a quarrel. The child said: "Obviously it was grandma who made the loud noise first." "I said: "It's not the first day you met grandma. Grandma's voice is already loud. And grandma is an elder. If she criticizes you, just listen to her and don't contradict her. If you want to explain, you should say it well. Arguing won't solve the problem. You have to explain it so that grandma can understand it. "The child nodded.
After dinner, I started to write study records. The child said: "Chinese language today is about oral communication "Pay attention to the tone of speech". Do you know how to pay attention to your tone of voice? I said, "Speak slower?" "
The child said seriously: "No. First, don’t speak too stiffly. Second, avoid using a command tone. She pointed to the examples in the book and said, "I will perform these two sentences for you with different tones." "
She first acted arrogantly while pointing her finger at the other person, and then acted modestly and politely, tilting her head playfully while speaking. She said: "Speak softly like the second one I performed. "
I teased her and said, "Hey, today's lesson about paying attention to the tone of speech is the same as the topic we just discussed! Then why did you behave differently from what you said just now? " She was stunned and her face changed.
I deliberately imitated her loudly: "I told you I don't want to eat! It was her grandma who insisted on buying it for me! You have wronged me! "The child laughed so much that he rolled to the ground holding his belly.
She finally stopped laughing and asked me: "Mom, what would you tell the teacher if you were late?" I asked, "What would you say?"
The child rolled his eyes and said, "Teacher, I slept last night It was too late, and I had a dream and didn’t sleep well, so I didn’t hear the alarm clock ringing in the morning..." I said, "That’s wrong. How can you say that? Did the teacher teach you?"
The child jumped anxiously. I staggered twice and said, "It was my classmate who answered like this. Our teacher nodded while listening and said that she said it very well. I think the teacher agreed with what the classmate said."
I said, " First of all, being late is a mistake. If you make a mistake, you must first admit it. " The child said: "But you didn't say you didn't like it, I said sorry."
I explained: "I said this because you have done the same thing wrong many times. For example, when you ran around in the shower, I told you many times before you listened. The first time you told me you were sorry, of course I would forgive you. But you only said sorry but didn't change, and then I didn't want to believe you anymore. . That’s why I said I don’t like to hear you say sorry.” The child lowered his head and pinched the paper ball in his hand.
I said: " If you do something wrong, you must first have a correct attitude, admit that you have done something wrong, and then change your behavior. Otherwise it will sound like you are quibbling. Let me play the role with you, I will be the child who is late. .”
I pretended to put on my schoolbag and ran to the child. The child looked at me and smiled from ear to ear, unable to continue the act. I pretended to be angry and said, "Humph, I won't play with you anymore." The child held back his laughter and said, "You're so funny. I'll be the late classmate, and you be the teacher." I agreed.
The child put his schoolbag on his back and ran out of the room. I stood up and waited for the child's arrival. The child ran in pretending to be late. I shouted sternly: "Stop! Which class are you in?" The child stopped and said with a smile: "Our teacher will not be as cruel as you."
I said: "My teacher was so cruel when I was a child, you He was still laughing and joking when he was late and had to stand outside the classroom as punishment!" The child giggled and knelt down and said, "It's so funny."
I said seriously: "My elementary school has changed 4 class teachers, your current one The teacher may not necessarily continue to teach you in the future." The child got up and said, "Okay, I'll do it again."
She ran out of the room and ran in again. I looked at my watch pretending to be impatient, raised my eyes and saw the child coming in, and said sternly: "Stop! Look what time it is now? Why are you here so late?"
The child lowered his head and said slowly: "I'm sorry, teacher. I'm late. I forgot to put the Chinese books in my schoolbag when I was cleaning it last night. I remembered it in the morning, but I was already on my way to school. I went back home to get my books, so I was late," I said. : "Okay, clean your schoolbag in advance and don't be late again." The child nodded.
The performance was over, and the child jumped up happily. I said: "You just gave a lot of reasons. Can you briefly summarize them in one sentence? " The child looked at me doubtfully.
I gave an example: "Just use one sentence to explain this clearly. Who did it, what did it do, and how was it." The child thought for a while and said, "I forgot to bring the book. I went back to get it, so I was late." I said : "Well, that's a good summary."
The child asked happily: "Mom, if a classmate touches your notebook to the ground and steps on it a few times, what will you do?" I pretended to be angry and said: "Who is it? , Who dares to step on my book? Let him pay!" The child chuckled after hearing this.
I also smiled and said: "Am I talking about a negative teaching material? In fact, usually I don't say anything when encountering this kind of situation, I just pick up the notebook and do my own thing." The child smiled and said: "Me too ."
Here is Xiao Huomiao's growth diary [stunned][stunned]
Previous highlights:
My eyes were moist when I heard the child's words
When the child is unhappy, should parents divert the child's attention?
Does a child love to study while eating and reading? No, the child is developing these bad habits
