Having an adolescent child in the family often means constant quarrels and turbulence, as if adolescent children are born synonymous with rebellion. This is reasonable, but it must be unreasonable. Adolescent children are in a critical period of growth, that is, yearning to grow up, but not fully grown up. They are still minors, their emotional level is not warm, and some aggressive behavior is understandable, but parents are all adults, parents must learn how to deal with adolescent children, how to deal with the problem of communication with adolescent children.
Faced with adolescent children, parents must prepare for it, learn relevant psychological knowledge, master the skills of communicating with children, of course, the most important thing is to understand the pattern of getting along with adolescent children, and give them when they encounter problems The most appropriate handling methods and coping skills.
As a father of a child, Min-Kyu Lee, a South Korean doctor of psychology, has the most strict psychological background. He sincerely introduced him and his children to all the parents in the world about the treatment of puberty. There is also this book: "What to say to adolescent children, and how to say it? ".
At first glance at this topic, I believe many people will think that this is a book about communication skills with adolescent children. But this is not comprehensive. Compared with how to say, what is said to adolescent children is the most important. In other words, parents need to bring adolescent children with psychological knowledge that is truly meaningful in their lives. If we have mastered what we need to say to the children, how to say it will be a matter of course.
For example, the first chapter of this book is about reading, grades and status. So what should our parents tell their children in this regard? Can a good grade determine everything? Can only good grades be able to complete a good life? It seems that this is not the case, because there are too many counterexamples in this world, so many founders of companies who have dropped out of college, some have become the richest man in the world, they are living examples, Edison, Bill Gates, Jobs Wait, if we tell the children that grades are everything, then these counterexamples are the children's best weapon against us.
But what if the results are not good? What happens to people with poor grades? This is indeed no counterexample. Many people with poor grades are living bad lives. There are too many living examples around us. Poor grades and a glorious life require too many prerequisites. They are different from ordinary people’s talents, good at innovation, hard-working, etc. These characteristics allow them to maintain even when they are not in college. Attitude to study. They can achieve brilliant achievements, there are too many other factors, but our own children have these factors? If not, then we must tell them: "If you have poor grades, you will probably be unhappy." Is there any other reason for our children to oppose it? Unless he wants to accept an unhappy life.
There is another situation, when children complain about their grades, such as: I always don’t learn mathematics well, I am too stupid, I don’t have this talent, etc., and we have to correct them in time. statement. There is a saying in psychology called self-fulfilling prophecy. When a saying is said too much, it is possible to realize it. When our children often talk about negative comments, they will gradually fall into negative emotions. And our parents must encourage their children to change their views: Is there any way to improve math scores? How can I improve my ability in this area? Speaking from a positive attitude implies that you are actively looking for the ability to change.
Does it feel like this book speaks a bit like verbal art, but what does it say about adolescence when the mood swings are the most severe? how to say? However, it is one of the most critical factors. This is also the place that must be paid attention to for growing children. Even if it is speaking, it is also the most consistent with psychological common sense. In addition to the above-mentioned academic content, topics to be discussed with children also include setting life goals for them, letting them understand time and efficiency management, letting them find motivation for learning, and so on. These are the most important content for adolescent children, and there are corresponding "words" in this book. With these contents mastered, adolescent children are no longer difficult to manage, no longer rebellious, and our parents will be the best teachers to truly take them out of their misunderstandings. #读的温度# #全民推荐书人# #青春期#
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