Lao Dan was originally surnamed Wang, but because he was always worried, everyone called him " Lao Dan ". He was worried about being late for work when he woke up in the morning, was worried about not washing the vegetables when eating, was worried about too much pesticide when eating, was worried about traffic safety when walking, was worried about not completing work at the unit, and was worried about bad people entering the house at home. In short, he was worried about this and that, all day long, just not worried about the life that was affected by his "worry".
Actually this is a problem. is called obsessive anxiety , and is also related to perfectionism . They want to work hard to do everything well, but they are worried that they will not do well and not perfect enough. The so-called perfectionism means that you hope that everything will achieve your expected results, and you must ensure perfection. For example, your work must be in line with your wishes, and your wife must be the best one. The downside of perfectionism is that you cannot perfect . Because this world is not perfect. Many things won't follow you.
so you may get a lot of idleness because of this. For example, if you get angry because of a traffic jam at work, think that the driver is not of high quality, think that there is something wrong with the road designer; your wife does housework and makes you uncomfortable, and you think that you should wipe the table from left to right. In short, it is futile to try to change the outside world to pursue perfection. There will always be things you unexpectedly appear, making you unprepared and easily get angry. Because you want everything to follow you.
Your pain comes from your overly persistence. Maybe you think you can make great inventions in this way. In fact, the data shows that perfectionists are inversely proportional to their chances of success. In other words, the more you pursue perfection, the more likely you are to fail. Because from the beginning, they were worried about failure and became anxious, which made them unable to do things with all their might. After failure, they become extremely anxious, depressed and depressed, and will desperately try to escape. They rarely calm down and summarize lessons from failure. They only consider how to avoid embarrassment and will try to attribute the causes of failure to external factors. They are worried that their image will be damaged and that their image will become imperfect. Because they have such a serious ideological burden, it is difficult for them to achieve career success, and often lead to confusion in family, life and interpersonal relationships.
In fact, we imperfect people are the most perfect, because we know that many ideas are unrealistic, and we will not stick to our obsessions and will make ourselves stronger to solve our problems.
So people with this kind of anxiety and perfect idea try to do things that seem "unimportant" and "unnecessary" to you. These things can often bring you real happiness, such as meeting friends or going out for a trip. In the past, you may choose more "important" and "necessary" responsibilities and obligations. You should know that all your actions in the past are serious and harsh purposeful, which means that they are too purposeful. Only by changing your habits will you become truly perfect.
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