I believe that most people would not have thought that keeping a diary might be one of the manifestations of narcissism: On the surface, keeping a diary can record important events and exercise writing skills, but from a motivational perspective, it may be to satisfy narcissism.
has a set of foreign cartoons - "A Girl's Day", which depicts the daily experience of an eleven or twelve-year-old girl: getting up, looking in the mirror, dressing up, playing with a boy of similar age, and the boy gives her a flower. Flowers, kissed her, then went home to write a diary, and finally fell asleep sweetly in the beautiful mood after writing the diary. You can imagine how satisfied this little girl is with herself, and the diary is used to satisfy her narcissism. If a diary is a book, then this book usually has only one reader - the author himself. Those who show their diaries magnify their narcissism. Of course, students are forced to write diaries under pressure from teachers and parents, which has nothing to do with narcissism.
Who prefers looking in the mirror, women or men? Who is more narcissistic? A psychologist did an experiment where they placed a large mirror on the side of the road and observed who would take a picture of it. The results are surprising: Men like looking in the mirror more than women! However, there are loopholes in this experiment. Some people would say that women spend several times more time than men grooming themselves before going out. Of course, they no longer have to use roadside mirrors. Perhaps it will never be clear who is more narcissistic, men or women, but there are differences in the narcissistic styles of men and women. Looking in the mirror is ironclad evidence of women's narcissism, while pursuing higher authority and greater success is a typical manifestation of men's narcissism.
When it comes to "narcissism", people tend to misunderstand that "narcissism is pathological". In fact, a certain amount of narcissism is necessary and beneficial to a person. For example: Artists' narcissism to a certain extent is not only not a problem sometimes, but can actually increase their personal charm. Such strong narcissism is semi-pathological if it excludes anything alien. There was a girl who transferred to a new school. Within a month after joining the class, she had three classmates. None of her classmates liked her very much. It turns out that she usually likes to boast and often talks about some things in extravagant ways. If any classmate pointed out her shortcomings, she would immediately get angry and quarrel with others. She would only proceed from her own interests no matter what, regardless of other people's views and opinions. This girl is an exaggerated narcissist who exaggerates her abilities. The other is passive narcissism, always worrying about one's own health. This kind of worry can reach the level of depression . Grandiose narcissism and passive narcissism are often intertwined in a narcissist. For narcissists, they do not have the ability to objectively reflect, and their self-evaluation is slightly threatened (there may be some threats, and it may be caused by sensitivity), which is a fatal blow to them. They cannot accept others being better than themselves or any kind of "failure". It is worth explaining that normal people also have this mentality, but this mentality does not affect interactions with others.
There are many factors that produce narcissism, among which family environment ranks first. Single-parent families play an important role in the formation of narcissism. The resentment and dissatisfaction of the father or mother who divorced due to bad relationships often show up in front of the children, making the children feel that other people are unlovable and unsuitable for contact, which promotes the emergence of narcissism. Parents often praise and pamper their children, especially only children, consciously or unconsciously, in front of their children or in front of others, making the children think highly of themselves since childhood. This often becomes the basis for the emergence of narcissism. If parents do not encourage their children to make friends, or even prevent them, it will promote the emergence of narcissism. A boy who was raised by his mother alone encountered such a problem, "I have many instinctive and natural feminine movements. When I laugh, I can't help but cover my mouth with my hands, just like a girl." Many of my sexual impulses do not come from the body of the opposite sex, but from the excitement of seeing the opposite sex and imagining that I can wear a bra, women's underwear, high heels, be pampered, and lose my temper after becoming a woman.Another special situation is a traumatic experience, which has suffered a major mental or physical blow, leading to a loss of heterosexual or homosexual interests and turning into a narcissist.
In short, general narcissism is not necessarily a bad thing, but moderation is important. Narcissism is like salt for cooking. If it is too little, it will be bland and tasteless. If it is too much, it will be difficult to eat. Correctly treating one's own strengths and weaknesses is the first step for narcissists to get rid of their shackles and enter a normal life. Secondly, we must engage in more interpersonal communication, learn to communicate spiritually with others, and open up our closed heart. Only then can we truly get rid of self-centeredness and get out of our own small space.
Narcissistic personality test to test how high your narcissism level is
1. Can I always influence other people's views on things?
yes 2 points
no 1 point
2. The more others think I can’t do it, the more I want to do it?
yes 2 points
no 1 point
3. If I were in a leadership position, would I do things better?
Yes 2 points
No 1 point
4. The more people there are, the more I want to express myself?
yes 2 points
no 1 point
5. Among the crowd, am I the most unique one?
yes 2 points
no 1 point
6. In my field, no one seems to surpass me?
yes 2 points
no 1 point
7. It is a great honor to make others serve you.
yes 2 points
no 1 point
8. I like taking selfies very much.
yes 2 points
no 1 point
9. It involves issues that you are familiar with and you have a strong motivation to challenge.
Yes 2 points
No 1 point
10. Do you like looking in the mirror very much?
yes 2 points
no 1 point
11. I look forward to getting more recognition and support.
yes 2 points
no 1 point
12. No one can interfere with my decision?
Yes 2 points
No 1 point
13. Do you have the urge to write an autobiography?
yes 2 points
no 1 point
14. I hope more people understand me?
yes 2 points
no 1 point
15. Some people really can’t live without me.
Yes 2 points
No 1 point
Test results:
15-20 points Narcissism index: ★
You are not a narcissistic person. The biggest difference between you and a narcissist is that you have a basic sense of identity with yourself. The reason why narcissists develop narcissistic psychology is that they do not want to accept that they are not good enough. For you, you can accept the good side of yourself and the bad side. You will not exaggerate yourself too much, nor will you feel too inferior. Based on your sense of self-identity, you gain the unity of your personality and have a goal and direction to improve yourself. Narcissists often make a good first impression, but only the first impression. And if you show affinity in interpersonal communication, you will be more popular with everyone.
21-25 points narcissism index: ★★★
There is an obvious narcissistic tendency in your personality. You like to feel superior and have a strong desire to express yourself, and strive to leave the first impression on others. He often thinks highly of himself and often expresses anger and rejection when criticized. Like to use exaggeration and bragging to maintain an unrealistic self-concept. Desire for feelings of fame, success, and honor. It will leave a good impression in the short term, but the longer you get along, the less likely you are to be liked. But the good thing is that you still have a basic positioning of yourself. Although this positioning is higher than the real you, you still retain a bit of humility.
26-30 points Narcissism Index: ★★★★★
You hope to establish a good image in the minds of others and give people a confident, charismatic, and unique impression. I often feel that I am superior to others and feel that this is the consensus of everyone. You expect to be treated specially and that rules and restrictions apply only to others and not to you. Lack of sympathy in the heart, indifference to others, and lack of empathy ability. He has trouble caring about other people's feelings when he acts and likes to make his own decisions and go his own way. Overestimate your own abilities and regard the advantages that everyone has as your own unique advantages.
