1. A foreign girlfriend received a letter from her boyfriend and was horrified because he wrote in the letter: "When we meet again, I will definitely kill you." 2. A man who was preparing for a wedding asked his friend: " How much does it cost to get a marriage certificate?" His

1. A foreign girlfriend was horrified when she received a letter from her boyfriend, because he wrote in the letter: "When we meet again, I will definitely kill you."

2. A man who was preparing for a wedding asked his friend: " How much does it cost to apply for a marriage certificate? "His friend said: "9 yuan, plus your lifetime income."

3. A man who knocked on the door had a big fight with his wife today. The reason for the quarrel was the distribution of family funds, which the man felt was unfair. The wife said: If it weren't for my money, the TV wouldn't be here. If it weren't for my money, my son wouldn't have grown up like this. If it weren't for my money, the house wouldn't be here! The man snorted and said: If it weren't for your money, I wouldn't be here!

4. I had a minor operation in the hospital last year and fell in love with an intern nurse. She was on night shift today, and I went to pick her up after get off work. She was sitting in the passenger seat, holding a lipstick in her hand. She looked at the lipstick and asked me: "Whose is this?" I was confused for a moment, and after thinking for a while I said: "Yesterday, several colleagues went to a dinner together, and there was a female colleague sitting in the passenger seat. She might be touching up her makeup. Later, I forgot to take it away!" She said angrily: "It's so fast to make up a story. This lipstick is a new one I bought!"

5. I went to the fruit supermarket to buy durian after get off work in the evening and met my schoolmate who was a bad student in high school. When he saw me, he immediately took out the car key of Ferrari and showed it off in front of me: Old classmate, you are a girl, you can still go to college, it doesn't matter if you can't go to college like me. I smiled slightly and said: You are just a nouveau riche. Let me not tell you that reading is to improve your ideological realm. I will ask you, do you know what the English button on your car means? The scumbag was stunned, clapped his hands, and then a young man in a suit and leather shoes came over. The scumbag said: This is my driver, a doctoral student who returned from studying in Cambridge.

6. I took my 6-year-old niece to KFC to eat burgers. I met someone doing street research on the road, and he seemed to be an anchor. She asked: "If your girlfriend checks your phone and reads your chat history, will you get angry?" Just when I was thinking about how to give her a perfect answer, my little niece said: "Sister, please don't embarrass my uncle. He is like this." How can such a person have a girlfriend? "

7. There is a female colleague in the company who has just divorced and is pursuing a lot of men. So she asked me: "Brother, why do you think so many men are chasing me? I don’t think they are sincere.” I sneered and said, “It’s good if you know!” The female colleague suddenly held my hand and said, “Brother, why don’t you chase me too?”