When a third party interferes with the marriage, how to deal with extramarital affairs and become the ultimate winner of the marriage is particularly important.
Two people can attract each other and come together, this is a kind of fate. How to maintain such a good relationship is the most important thing for husband and wife to work together.
However, I don't know when the term "derailment" frequently appears in people's lives, and it has become one of the killers of the broken relationship between husband and wife.
In a marriage, the unfaithfulness of either party will cause indelible harm to the partner and family, and make life deviate from the original plan. The feelings of husband and wife are pure and they cannot tolerate a grain of sand. Any betrayal will shake the foundation of trust.
But on the other hand, if a woman can't tolerate her husband's betrayal at all, she should choose to divorce and start a new life, rather than expressing forgiveness and torturing each other intentionally or unintentionally in the future. After
derailed, is it divorced or repaired?
When we have to make a choice, the key is to see which option is the most profitable and which option pays the lowest cost.
So, which one is more expensive for you, or harder to recover or divorce?
If you judge by instinct, you will find that divorce is more difficult. Otherwise, why do so many people really want to divorce, but still do not choose to divorce?
Actually, this is a misunderstanding. In fact, it is more difficult to recover, and the cost is higher.
First of all, recovery is not achieved by one person's efforts.
Whether the other party can get back the decisive factor, if the other party just doesn't want to go back, then you try again, no matter how perfect, no matter how brilliant, this is futile. In particular,
should pay attention to that, in order to recover the loss, many adulterers know better than the betrayed party, and there is no way to turn back. Because he knew that he was the one who made mistakes, his betrayal must be a knot of his spouse. If this knot is difficult to eliminate, he cannot live a comfortable life. Because of his betrayal, he may even be held by the other party all day long.
Generally speaking, there are three ways to deal with derailment:
1. Open one eye and close one eye, which will make his betrayal more frequent and excessive. This negative attitude will make your life a mess, like a walking dead.
2, there is no room for sand in my eyes, you can divorce him decisively. But this requires you to have two abilities: first, you have the ability to identify and find another loyal man; second, you have enough courage to face and solve all the trivial things after divorce.
3. To crush the sand in your eyes, you need skills to guide and guide your husband to change.
Except for the first method, the latter two methods are very difficult. But you need to think carefully, because this is a process you have to go through.
Second, the degree of recovery is difficult to grasp. The biggest contradiction and entanglement of
betrayal is that they don't know how to deal with each other.
If they are sincere, afraid that the other person has a short memory, and think they are easy to bully, but they are not the same thing, then the possibility of betrayal is higher. Especially many people, in order to save each other, adopt a more flattering attitude. If on the contrary, they are indifferent to each other, always alert, and distrust each other, then the already precarious relationship may be increasingly on the verge of collapse.
Therefore, in such a time, people will feel that their personalities will not be split for a long time, and therefore, they will not feel lost.
Third, even if it recovers, it takes a lot of effort to repair the relationship, and there will be many sequelae.
If the opponent turns around, can he digest this knot and cross this ridge? In reality, in many such situations, it is not easy to find your lover, but you still find yourself not up. Betrayal is like a thorn behind your back, often rooted in your own pain.
In addition, with the betrayal of the marriage, there is a gap between the two after all. This gap will become an obstacle between two people. You will find that no matter how hard you work, there seems to be no conversation between two people, only tacit and intimate relationship.
However, the biggest damage is trust. Rebuilding trust is not a simple project. It takes years for each other to improve.
Fourth, your efforts may still be in vain.
If you choose to recover, you still need to pay or invest. This kind of investment and rewards are actually risky. If the other party can't find it, your efforts and efforts will be vanished, which is equivalent to effort and effort.
this does notIt means that divorce is relatively simple. Divorce is actually very difficult, otherwise there will not be so many people who know that their marriage is dead but still choose not to divorce.
But in the end, divorce is a decision you can make yourself. As long as you really want to leave, there is no marriage that you cannot leave.
In addition, although divorce is also painful, if you can overcome this short and severe pain, then, from the beginning of the divorce, you actually have the hope of a new life, otherwise you will be truly free.
Then, all your time and energy, etc., will be devoted to yourself and give it to yourself completely. Then, all efforts will pay back to you.
The last question is: Since recovery is more difficult than divorce, why do we choose to recover more in reality?
This is the result of emotion, recovery, in line with the inner emotional needs; divorce, you are psychologically excluded.
For marriage, infidelity is not so much a crime committed by the offender against the victim, as it is a crisis experienced by both spouses.
If a woman's mood at this time can be stabilized and see her responsibilities in the marriage, she should not blindly or impulsively cause the incident to develop more viciously. The current situation can be saved.
If the couple can share responsibilities and communicate well, then the crisis is also an opportunity for growth.
If we can get through this crisis smoothly, we will definitely enhance mutual understanding and trust between the two sides, and bring the relationship between husband and wife to a higher level.
