When a man is married, a woman is married. When a person grows up, he must enter the marriage hall. (We will not discuss those in the temple for a long time)
Marriage can be said to be the top priority in life. Therefore, Chaoshan people have paid more attention to the sense of wedding ceremony since ancient times. Naturally, there are a lot of exquisites.
Many new generations of Chaoshan people
There is less and less understanding of the traditional wedding customs of Chaoshan
Although it is related to the current simplified wedding process
But many people who are about to get married
ask three questions about this
Talk to you today
About the marriage of Chaoshan people
(The Chaoshan is different Regions are slightly different)
Chaoshan traditional wedding process
1
提亲
Promotion of marriage, which is adopted in ancient times, commonly known as the support of the media Marriage proposal means that the matchmaker goes to the man to propose marriage, or the matchmaker first goes to the man to introduce the woman's situation, and then the man agrees to entrust the matchmaker to the woman's home to propose marriage.
In the past, marriages were only considered legal if they followed the words of the matchmaker and the orders of the parents. During the Ming Dynasty, the trend of free marriage and love had affected urban and rural areas, and parents gradually took into consideration their children's opinions. But even for those who are in love with each other, many people still ask the matchmaker to seek marriage to avoid sexual intercourse and to comply with the local rules and family laws.
After 1949, the people's government stipulated marriage independence, abolished feudal sales and arranged marriages. After the "Marriage Law" was promulgated, it was implemented better in the Chaoshan area, and the old-style matchmaker basically disappeared as a profession.
2
合婚
Marriage, that is, ask for the first name, in Chaoshan, it is called a combined character. That is, after both men and women agree to propose marriage, the matchmaker writes the woman's name, birth date, birthplace, and ancestors into Geng Tie and sends it to the man.
If there are no accidents or unlucky things in the man’s house within three days, such as broken bowls, pots, etc., this is called "three days good." With this good omen, the man agreed to exchange Geng posts. After changing the Geng Tie, each invites people to marry each other to confirm whether the man and woman are born or restrained. If they are restrained, the marriage will have to fall through.
3
定亲
Marriage, also called engagement, is when the man prepares a gift to the woman’s home to set the marriage for the children. The gift is usually a pair of gold earrings or a gold ring, and there are also gold necklaces, as well as sugar, noodles, ground beans (sugar peanut sticks), biscuits, melon books (sugar melon slices), etc. This is a gift for engagement .
The woman distributes the sweets and cakes sent by the man’s family to relatives, friends and neighbors, and reports the good news to everyone that her daughter is already a famous flower; the man gives the fruits and cakes from the wife’s home to friends, friends and neighbors. The marriage partner himself will also invite someone to smoke, telling himself the happy event of the marriage partner.
4
行擊
Line hiring, also known as hiring or dismissing, in the old name "recruitment".
In the past betrothal gifts, the rich were gold and silver, colored satin, pigs, sheep, and fruit; the poor were betel nuts and chicken wine. Chaozhou people regard betel nut as a symbol of good luck, which is a special gift for hire. Contemporary dowry gifts include physical objects and cash. The physical objects must have more than four types: sugar, noodles, daji (Chaozhou orange), gold and silver jewelry, clothing fabrics, cakes, etc., but it cannot be an odd number, it must be an even number.
Cash is also called the offer, and it is divided into one, two, or four, but they are all multiples. The bride price is for the woman’s parents; the gift money is like gold and silver jewelry (in many areas in Chaoshan, there are “four kinds of gold”: ring, necklace, earRings and bracelets), fabrics are given to the daughter-in-law.
In Chaoshan, in addition to gift money, the most important thing is the "four kinds of gold", which can be said to be indispensable.
5
请期
Request a period, commonly known as "choose a date", that is, after the betrothal gift, the man should choose the date of marriage and give it to the woman’s wedding date stickers, including informing the woman what When the wedding dress is tailored, when the face is suitable, when to take a bath, when to marry, etc., the woman agrees and replies, which is called the end of employment.
Twelve posts: "open door post", "general post", "bridal post", "in-law post", "clan elder post", "grandfather post" , "Cheng Shu Bo Tie", "Cheng Yue Qin Tie", "Cheng Yue Qin Tie", "Cheng Yue Fei Tie", "Wuhui Family Tie", "Ban Tie" (2 photos).
In the past few years, the application period has generally been carried out together with the offer. Most of the time requested is in the middle of the night, and the wedding custom of welcoming relatives in the middle of the night is a legacy of ancient times.
6
迎亲
Welcoming, also called marrying, is the "welcome" of the ancient six rites. This is the ceremony for the man to marry the bride at the woman's home, and it is also one of the most important procedures in the entire wedding.
There are two old custom welcoming marriages: one is the bridegroom welcoming the bride, the other is the man invites a "good man" to greet him, and now most of the bridegroom greets the bride himself.
In some places in Chaoshan, the custom of welcoming relatives was abolished because hooligans blocked the way to ask for money and demanded acting. Qing Jiaqing’s "Chenghai County Chronicles" stated: "Because of recent bad habits, young people in the streets often use colorful ropes to live and entertain the public. Xu Zhinai let go, or fights, and the wedding ceremony is gradually abandoned."
The custom of marrying in some places is quite special. For example, in some places in Chaoyang in the old days, husbands had to hang a piece of fat pork (pig 朥) before the sedan chair to marry the bride. This custom has been passed down since the Ming Dynasty.
Three-matches and six certificates in Chaoshan marriage customs
In the old fashion, all children and daughters must follow the ancient customs and etiquette, pay attention to etiquette, and have three-matches and six certificates.
三传媒
Matchmaker's words-the marriage of children must be matched through matchmakers, and various information is passed on between the male and female households;
The order of the parents ——The parents of both children listened to the words of the matchmaker, and after consideration, they decided that they could be married, so they allowed their marriage;
The credibility is fixed——The parents of both men and women allow their children’s marriage After that, the man and woman gave each other an item as a token and made a marriage agreement.
六证
Six certificates are the six daily necessities for the bride to marry at home.
Shengzi——can measure how much food there is in the home, which is convenient for careful planning and thrifty housekeeping;
scissors——used to cut clothes;
ruler——used to tailor clothes;
mirror——used to take care of your face and beautify yourself;
weigher——used to weigh things for easy trading;
abacus——used to settle accounts to know the balance of income and expenditure Happening.
Talking about marriage in Chaoshan area. Taboos in marriage
1
Mianface
Before the bride gets married, the bride must have face-dressing.
Turning face, also known as "opening face", "face repair", because this is the first beauty activity of a girl in her life, so it is very solemn, and the person in charge of turning face must be a "good life person" (children and grandchildren) , The prestigious old woman). After "drawing the face", give a gift of thanks to the "good life man".
Due to the popularization of modern cosmetology, the technique of "face-removing" has almost disappeared, and it has become a "stunning skill".
2
Bathing and changing clothes
The bride needs to choose a day to bathe and change clothes.
The bride in Chao'an area should bathe in fairy grass and pomegranate flowers. After the bath, she stands in a pre-prepared bamboo pot, and a "good life man" sent by the man puts on her wedding gown.
In Raoping area, 12 kinds of flowers and leaves, such as pomegranate flowers, should be placed in the bridal bath. After the bath, the bride sits in a pot and eats two boiled eggs to pray for a smooth birth after marriage (like a hen).
When the bride leaves her natal family, she wears more clothes and can’t be sewn with straps inside or out, which means not to pretend the “lucky” of her parents’ home will be taken away. Home has created a new world.
3
睡地
In the old Chaozhou area, the girl could not sleep on the bed the night before she got married, but should sleep on the ground.
According to legend, in ancient times, there was a woman who got married, and the stepmother did not treat her as a person, so she pulled out the bed and let her sleep on the floor. The mother of Goddess of Mercy sent her son to know her and felt very sympathetic to her and gave her a child and two sons. In order for the women to have a promising future after their marriage, people followed suit and became a custom. But this custom is now abolished.
4
Eat Sister Meal
The bride in Puning gets married. In the morning, she will have breakfast with her family and colleagues (close friends), which is called “sister meal”.
Three days before the marriage of the bride in Raoping area, the daily life of the bride is accompanied by her neighbors and sisters. On the day of marriage, eat "six bowls", that is, six dishes, accompanied by the bridesmaids.
In some places, on the morning of the wedding day, you have to have breakfast with your parents and brothers, and other women cannot sit in. If your parents or brothers are absent due to an event, they should also prepare a table, put a table, chopsticks, spoon, and serve the meal. At the banquet, the parents prepared a bowl of longevity noodles and a plate of pork liver with stir-fried green onions for their daughters, meaning that in the future the husband and wife will live longer, their children will be smart, and they will become rich.
In some places (such as Chaoyang) the girl’s wedding day, the girl’s family must prepare dishes for her to eat alone in the living room, with red candles on the table to show her joy. Two bowls of rice should be eaten, one bowl is eaten and the other is watched, to show that you are rich in life and have enough food and clothing. The bride can only eat half of a bowl at most, and it is less than half as beautiful, indicating that more wealth is left to make her natal family richer.
5
give "sister money"
Puning, Huilai and other places brides have the custom of giving "sister money" to their marriage.
Puning brides have to sprinkle the copper coins on the rice sieve after having breakfast on the day of their marriage, and then the brothers and sisters will pick them from the oldest to the youngest.
Huilai’s Kuitan area, "sister money" is given by the bridegroom who came to marry through a man and a woman to the younger brothers and sisters who sent the bride on the road (a couple of men and women give it on behalf of, meaning: "Good" means that one son and one daughter are combined), the number is very small, generally 4 yuan 4 cents 8 points, or 448 points, whichever means "every time without separation (separation)".
6
分钱米
In Haishan Town, Raoping County, the bride must share money and rice with her brother on the day of her marriage.
First put some money and rice on the dustpan or bamboo sieve by his mother or aunt, shake it vigorously, and say as you shake it: "You will be round and round, and your children and grandchildren will have a lot of money; Grandchildren.” Then divide the money and rice into one share according to the number of brothers and the daughter. The daughter takes the money and rice and puts it in the special belly pocket for her marriage. On the third day of arrival at the husband’s house, he puts the money and rice in In the rice urn of the husband's house.
7
Sitting Water Cylinder
Old farmer married daughter in Jiexi CountyAt times, let her sit on the water tank before she can go on the sedan chair.
This vulgar implies that your daughter should be like a water tank, be a "big man", open-minded, and don't care about everything.
8
传證女德
On the eve of the marriage of a Chaoshan woman in old times, parents should teach her how to be a good wife, such as dressing neatly. You must be diligent in your hands and feet, sweet in your mouth, respecting the old and loving the young, good-neighborly, etc., and hope that after marriage, she will be a good wife who is praised by others. The Chaoshan ballad "Bamboo Tube Boy" reflects this meaning:
Bamboo tube, short feet,
be a new woman mouth to learn well,
go dark sleep early,
hair comb Naked guys.
Long pod beans, tiptoes,
Be a man and a bride’s mouth is sweet,
Go dark and sleep early and get up early,
comb your hair.
9
送花粉
When a girl gets married, companions, sisters, relatives and friends must buy some gifts to show their congratulations, commonly known as "send pollen." Gifts are mostly used by women such as wool, clothing, painting screens, mirror tables, clocks, and toiletries. Generally, the dowry parties will not give away the necessary cosmetics to avoid misunderstanding.
There is no taboo in the Chaoshan area to send clocks, watches, fans, etc., because the "bell" and "end", and "fan" and "scattering" are not the same in Chaoshan, so don't be taboo.
Some places in Jiedong County and Rongcheng District mainly deliver pork and eggs, but Chenghai cannot deliver them. The girls accepted the gifts, all with wedding candy in return.
Many people today give away items that the married girl lacks, such as household appliances, calligraphy and painting, photo albums, books, etc. There are also gift gifts, not just for the woman, but for both men and women. They are collectively referred to as wedding gifts, but not pollen.
10
dowry
In the old days, on the eve of the bride’s wedding, the daughter’s family had a grooming, accompanied by drums and music to the husband’s husband’s house (commonly known as moving the dowry). The "half hall" is different.
"Full hall surface" refers to all the necessary supplies in the bedroom and hall after the bride arrives at the husband's house, such as kang bed, round table, drum chair, pair of chairs, leather suitcase, five barrels (rice bucket, bowl bucket) , Foot bucket, waist bucket, toilet), dressing table, gold and silver jewelry, up to kitchen rags, and even life boards (coffins) and land deeds. In rural areas, red pockets are used to pack grain seeds and a whole bamboo seedling is used as a pole to carry with the bride to her husband's house. The person who picks up the wedding items for the bride is called the "green man."
If the dowry lacks the land deed and coffin, it is called "half hall."
Regardless of whether the bride’s dowry items are large or small, a pair of pomegranate flowers (safflower) or pomegranate branches must be included. Pomegranate flower is commonly called "safflower", which means celebration. If not, the other party will think that it is unlucky or unlucky, and sometimes good events will conflict with pomegranate flowers. If you miss the blooming season, you can use branches and leaves instead.
The woman is married with "full hall" or "half hall", and the man will welcome her with grand etiquette: drum music, cages, colorful flags, and young men and women line up to welcome outside the village. In the past, wealthy people marrying daughters can be said to be all-encompassing. Daily necessities not only can be used by their daughters throughout their lives, they can even be used by their children and grandchildren. Some also use handmaid dowry. Medium-sized households do make-up, generally "dowry in the room is complete." Poor people do dowry, because they are in the predicament of being too frugal and wanting to stop, some people have to sell their fields and houses to dowry for the sake of face. Therefore, the adoption of daughters from poor families is regarded as "money-losing goods".
11
needle comb Harmony
When the old Raoping County bride got married, her mother had to bring her a box of sewing needles and a bone comb.
After arriving at her husband's house, the bride will send the needles to her relatives and neighbors' mother-in-law and other elders. It means to sew the mouths of your elders tightly with needles, hoping that everything in the future will be forgiving and instructing, not to say bad things about the bride; bone combing is to hope that her daughter will be like combing her hair, methodically, not hurriedly, decently, and have Upbringing.
12
Planting grass praying
When the girl in Kuitan, Huilai County gets married, she should bring two rooted grass head incense (sedge) with two good coke ( Namely canna, homophonic "good night"), it is planted in the vegetable garden after arriving at the husband's house to analyze the succession of Fu Lu and the descendants of generations.
Folklore The Southern Song Emperor was chased by Yuan soldiers to Qianqiu Town, ten miles northeast of Kuitan, and the two sides fought fiercely. After
ended, the young Emperor quickly fell asleep due to fatigue. After he woke up, he found that the place where he slept was a green sedge, and the Yuan soldiers were nowhere to be seen, so Long Yan rejoiced, and said to the sand grass: "Skin gives you dry descendants." The breeze passed, Sha The grass ups and downs, as if bowing to thank you. The young emperor was even more delighted, and asked his subordinates to dig a few plants and hold them in front of him for future commemorations, and sniff them lightly. A scent of fragrance overflowed from the grass head (root), and the spirit was refreshed, and he couldn't help but exclaimed: "It's really a grassy fragrance! "
Later, people used "grass head incense" to refer to sedge as a mascot during marriage, which means "thousands of descendants". Later, people called the couples "caotou wives".
13
投糖落水
In the area of Jieyang, the bride should bring a small amount of brown sugar when she gets married.
When entering her husband’s house, the bride used the space to receive relatives and friends, slipped into the kitchen by herself, and quietly threw a small amount of brown sugar into the edible water tank, or in the well or in the river, praying for future Get along well with the whole family and neighbors, and live a sweet life.
14
戴文明花
During the Republic of China, rural girls in some places wore civilized flowers when they married.
Tie a large silk flower with pink silk. The corolla is surrounded by floral ornaments such as lace lenses. Two wide and long silks hang from the left and right sides of the corolla, which are used as hanging curtains, draped diagonally from the forehead and four temples to the shoulders and sides of the body, to the knees. The bride held a silk fan in hand and bowed to salute relatives, friends and guests.
This is the concrete manifestation of the liberation of women's rights in the democratic revolution led by Mr. Sun Yat-sen. Extinct today. After the 1980s, with the gradual improvement of people's living standards, the flower of civilization has been replaced by wedding dresses.
15
Cry don’t go on the sedan
Old custom Raoping, Chao’an and other places, when the bride is on the sedan, she must cry. If the bride is happy and forgets to cry, his mother or bridesmaid will secretly twist her, and the bride will be cried as if she gets the hint.
Crying was originally the expression of the bride’s parting emotions, to express the inseparable affection for parents and siblings, and later developed into a stylized ceremony, intended to let the husband’s family know the bride "Chang'an is not as happy as the old house", and love her even more.
Chao'an is an old custom. After the bride leaves, the family should close the door immediately, in the hope that in the future, there will be no divorce and return to the natal family due to an accident at the groom’s house or the couple’s fallout. After the brides in Raoping and Jieyang went out, their mother hurriedly sprayed or sprayed rice grain or safflower (pomegranate flower) water, and said while spraying: "Safflower water, spray on the bridge, and the daughter will become like a lady's milk; red The flower water sprays to the sky, and the daughter joins the inside and the outside and joins the side of the house.”
When a Chaoyang folk bride stepped on to marry the sedan chair, the bride’s family should bring a bowl of water and pour it on the sedan chair while saying: “ After pouring water on the sedan, the bride will take it straight to her husband's house after she is on the sedan chair.
16
Change handkerchief
The old custom is married in a sedan chair. If two brides in a sedan chair meet on the road, handkerchiefs must be exchanged. The bread in the handkerchief includes Simao and Mocha.
Regarding this custom, folklore used to have a poor bride who had no dowry at all, and her husband’s family was impoverished, crying very sadly on the road. I happened to meet a rich bride on the way, and felt very sympathetic to her and gave her a pair of gold bracelets wrapped in a handkerchief. Later, when the poor bride arrived at her husband’s house, she made a fortune and became rich, while the rich bride became poorer after arriving at her husband’s house, so she begged along the street and became a beggar.
One day she happened to beg to the door of the previous poor bride. Seeing that the handkerchief she had given earlier was hanging on the bamboo pole in front of the door, she came to see her. The poor brides who have become rich do not forget their old graces, so they divide half of the family property to the rich brides of the past. From then on, both families have become rich families, which is a good story. After that, people followed suit one after another, and they followed suit.
Talking about the taboos in marriage
1
birthday taboo
The tide is generally that men are older than women, but they are 3 or 6 years old. Superstitions say it is "three-year-old punishment" and "six-year-old punishment".
2
Zodiac taboo
Chaoshan folk believe that the zodiac is similar to the character, and the temperament is similar to that of the zodiac.
The taboos of the zodiac are mainly for women, such as a woman of a tiger, who is ferocious, and knows how to avoid it; if a woman is a sheep, the folk saying goes: "The eyes are white, and it is difficult for a husband to stay at home."
As the saying goes: "There is no true life for a woman, and no life for a man is false", which highlights the inequality of marriage choices between men and women. (Click to view: Chaoshan people are inferior to men and women? You are afraid that they came from the Qing Dynasty!)
In the past, women who belonged to tiger and sheep were afraid of not marrying, so they falsely reported their age to break the taboo.
In addition, any person or widow whose zodiac sign is "tiger" should not watch the ceremony and enter the new house.
3
生肖相冲
Folk proverb: "The white horse is always afraid of the green ox, and the golden rooster is afraid of the tears of the dog; the dragon meets the rabbit and the cloud will go, and the snake uncle Xiangfeng once rests; A tiger is like a sword cut, and a pig meets an ape and a monkey." It is the conflict of the zodiac. The two cannot get married, otherwise it will bring uncertainty.
4
The five elements taboo
According to the birth date, see if the five elements of the two sides are living together. In ancient times, the five directions were governed by the heavens and the earth, and the five elements were governed by the five directions: Oriental Jiayi Wood. Southern Bingding Fire. Central Wujitu. Western Geng Xinjin. North Rengui water.
If "comprehensive", it is said that "eight characters are not in harmony"; if "combined", then praise: "Born to be a pair, set a pair on the ground, live together with each other, and full of descendants".
5
Ding forbidden
After the marriage is set, the man cannot go to the woman’s home. This is called: "The money has not passed, the rice has not been measured, it is not your Ziniang."
Chaoshan folklore believes: Zi Niangzi has not passed the door, and the man comes to visit casually, which is insulting to the family. Now it is normal to make arrangements for men and women to come and visit me, and the old customs are no longer retained.
6
Choosing a day taboo
Discussing relatives and taboos in the first lunar month, it is commonly said that ten discussions are not successful; “no marriage in spring year”
June is not suitable for marriage, because June is the "ghost month", and the folks believe that marriage during this period will cause both spouses to "break their shoulders" (middle-aged widows).
Marriage on the seventh day of July is forbidden to get married, for fear of breaking up like Cowherd and Weaver Girl, only meet once a year.
7
迎亲禁忌
When the bride leaves her natal house, the more she cries, the better. The more she cries, the more she doesn’t cry.
On the day of the wedding, when the bride goes out, the aunts and sisters must evade and cannot send each other. Because "aunt" and "gu" have the same pronunciation, and "sister-in-law" and "sao" have the same pronunciation, it is unlucky.
On the way to marry, if you encounter another team marrying the team, called "Xi Chong Xi", it will offset each other's blessings, so it is necessary to set off firecrackers or exchange flowers between the matchmakers to resolve it.
8
Other contraindications
( 1) When setting up a bed, place the bed upright and avoid facing the sharp corners of the desk, wardrobe or any object.
( 2) After the bed is set up to the eve of the wedding eve, the groom-to-be should not sleep alone in the new bed, but can find a Chinese zodiac and underage boy to accompany you, such as the dragon.
( 3) On the day of the engagement, no matter how hot the weather is, all those engaged in the engagement should not fan the fan, otherwise it will mean breaking up.
( 4) After the wedding banquet is finished, neither party can say goodbye, otherwise it will mean remarrying.
( 6) On the wedding day, no one can touch the new bed until bedtime at night. The bride should not touch the bedside on that day.
( 7) On the day of the wedding, the bride should not lie down, otherwise it means that she will be sick all year long.
( 8) Children cry easily, so children should be forbidden to enter the wedding hall, because crying in the auditorium is unlucky.
( 9) When the bride enters the man’s house, she should not step on the threshold and cross over.
(10) Be careful not to step on the groom’s shoes, it will be ashamed of her husband.
(11) On the day of returning to Ning, the newlyweds must leave their natal home before sunset, and must not stay at the natal home overnight. If there is a special reason for not going home, the husband and wife should sleep separately to avoid collision .
( 12) Do not participate in any weddings and funerals within four months of your newly-married marriage.
( 13) Do not spend the night outside within four months of newly married.
Now parents’ destiny and matchmaker’s words are becoming less and less important, but the custom of combining eight characters, watching the five elements and matching the zodiac still exists in the countryside, and it still has a great impact on the marriage of young men and women. And many other taboos are gradually disappearing.
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Author|SpiritLin
Edit |Talk君
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源| "Chaoshan Folklore Dictionary", partly from the Internet, if there is any infringement, please contact us to delete
