is written at the beginning:
Emotional beauty often lies in the moment of openness and transparency.
is just like celebrities and artists. Maybe they are worried that their relationship will affect their career development when they are made public, but they still blatantly declare that the other person is their lover.
This love, at the moment, is proof of their love for each other.
However, in life, the difference between love and ambiguity is clear and clear, but there are still some heterosexual married men and women who cannot develop into a couple relationship because one or both parties already have a lover, but they will still "flirt" without any scruples, calling each other special words, making people around them suspicious of their relationship and talking a lot.
In this life, you must know that among all relationships, love is the most difficult.
Because, it will not be like a family bond of flesh and blood. No matter how hard you try, blood will always be thicker than water. Love is very fragile and cannot withstand too much indifference and speculation.
Therefore, married men and women of the opposite sex must control their words and deeds. Don't chat too much, go too far, go out of your way, and make the relationship between two people appear to be "in love", but in fact they are "crossing the line". In the end, not only will you no longer be friends, but also the lover around you will also leave you.
In particular, the following must be completely avoided!
-01-
began to have ambiguous names: baby, dear, fool...
There are many names, which seem very common and seem to be just a name for each other, but if there is no sense of boundaries, it will most likely cause misunderstandings between both parties.
In particular, there are many men and women who use titles with the purpose of attracting each other's attention.
I still remember seeing a scene from a TV series.
The man obviously has a young and beautiful wife, but the female colleague next to him will still make noises at him from time to time when she is with him.
After several colleagues had a dinner together, the woman took the man's car home. When they got off the car, the two of them accidentally bumped their heads. The woman immediately smiled at her and said, "Look at how stupid you are," which made the man instantly confused.
And this sentence happened to be heard by the woman’s husband who came downstairs to pick her up. He was so shocked that he almost waved his fist at the man.
It can be seen that some words, for the interactions between heterosexual married men and women, are not sweet or close, but ambiguous, which is a signal of crossing the line.
This inexplicable emotion will make them forget their identity in an instant and ignore their bottom line and principles.
Perhaps, many couples, after being married for many years, have forgotten the feeling of loving each other sweetly. In the past, you and I gave each other nicknames and called each other's nicknames. These scenes are no longer as "feeling" as they were during the passionate love period.
However, at this moment, if someone suddenly calls him "dear" or "fool", he will immediately have the urge to fall in love again when he was young.
However, you must be sober. Addressing you will also ferment your affection. Even letting others hear this kind of address between you will cause many unnecessary misunderstandings.
If you get too close, it will definitely make your relationship lack of openness, and it will also bring harm and torture to your lover in marriage.
Therefore, if you want peace in marriage, learn to shut up, keep a proper distance, and don't use random names with people outside of marriage.
-02-
began to have an ambiguous feeling: calling each other Confidant, seems to have a tacit understanding
I still remember, in the TV series "Golden Wedding", Dazhuang said something to Shuzhen: I always thought that I was the pillar of the family, but in fact, you are the pillar of the family.
However, in life, how many women, even if they give everything for their lover within marriage, still cannot escape being left out and ignored in the end, and even have an affair with a woman outside marriage, and even call them "confidante", "like-minded" and "in tune with each other".
However, the so-called "mutual understanding" feeling between them is just that the two people do not live under the same roof and have never seen each other's most sloppy and miserable side, so they have a filter and think that such a person is their "dream lover".
has seen such a story.
A young couple, the two of them had an office romance.
The man is two years older than the woman. Before getting married, the man was very kind to the woman. After a year of getting along, the young couple happily received the certificate and got married. The woman also calmed down and gave her salary to the man for safekeeping. She cared deeply about the man and just wanted to live a good life.
However, the good times did not last long. After their child was born, the man began to have an affair with another female colleague.
Especially in companies, men often sing along with their female colleagues without any concern for their wives around them. A woman is burdened with rumors about a man's cheating, and when she returns home, she has to endure the man belittling her to nothing.
When a woman questions a man, the man shamelessly says to his wife: She understands me better than you do.
The woman finally got rid of the marriage in fear.
It can be seen that under the banner of "that person understands me better than you", many married men and women have done all the scandals in the world. They say "we have a good understanding" and "we have the same goals", but in fact they are just looking for an excuse to cross the line for their ambiguous behavior.
The relationship within marriage needs to have a bottom line. This bottom line is: no domestic violence, no cheating, no betrayal, no neglect... Once these are established, all "hurt" is inevitable.
However, this so-called "love" between married men and women is nothing more than stepping on their lovers, two people chasing moths into the flame.
-03-
began to cross the line: physical contact, eye contact
The emergence of many intimate relationships lies in physical cross-border. It seems that the two people have not said any sweet words or have any intentions, but the eye contact has said everything.
The same is true when there are signs of love between married men and women.
Two people flirted with each other across the screen. They were no longer satisfied, but wanted to come to each other and enter each other's lives.
However, this kind of "love" usually has a purpose.
Two people are either trying to find a reasonable excuse for their words and deeds under the banner of "love each other"; or they want to get rid of the constraints of morality. They obviously don't love each other enough, but they still want to maintain this ambiguous feeling.
I once heard a reader talk about a man and woman in their unit.
The man is a divorced person, the woman has a happy family, her husband loves her, and her son is sensible and obedient.
However, their colleagues all know that their relationship is not simple.
Men will help women prepare meals in the cafeteria every day. Whatever is distributed in the workplace, men will diligently help women deliver it to their doorsteps. Even when they are on a business trip, the two of them will be inseparable and stay alone together. People saw them holding hands without hesitation and taking an intimate walk together...
The ambiguous look in the eyes of the two people made it obvious to everyone that the relationship between them was not a normal relationship between colleagues, but a relationship between a man and a woman that had crossed the line.
However, they have a tacit understanding with each other. The man never asks the woman to divorce, and the woman also comforts her husband and the men outside perfectly.
I can only say that this kind of love is an extremely selfish act.
In such a relationship, they are so together, but they avoid many trivial matters in real life, because they only need to "love" and don't have to worry about all the trivialities of life. Therefore, they will unconsciously package this feeling of love with a "romantic" color.
However, once this kind of "love" is known by the other half, it will be a devastating blow to the marriage.
When there is less moral restraint and more desire driven in love, then it is just a kind of peace, but a kind of deception and harm to the lover in marriage.
Conclusion:
True love should be able to be announced loudly.
People who truly love each other should be able to walk up to others openly and declare their ownership of each other.
Many people, after many years of marriage, begin to feel empty.
Then, suddenly someone else broke in around me, and I was confused. It seemed that the love in the first half of my life was fake, and meeting this person was the real heartbeat.
However, in this life, the relationships between people are all in order.
Perhaps the love of your life is not your first love, nor is it the person you sleep with. However, no matter how tempted you are, you must learn to be patient, and you must also know how to control your words and deeds first.
The essence of marriage is to allow us to find happiness.
Instead, let us look for excitement outside of marriage.
The so-called "love" process between married men and women is actually just a process from passion to loss of novelty, and finally to mutual complaints.
Therefore, never forget that if you manage your marriage seriously, never forget that the kindness given to you by the person beside you is far greater than any feelings outside of marriage.
author, calm fox
picture, network
I hope you can find the deep affection in the ordinary years in my words! Thanks for your attention!
