The husband likes to eat delicious fish, while the wife likes to eat fish head and tail. The husband thinks that the delicious fish should be given to his wife, so every time the husband will hold the fish head and tail into his own bowl, and the wife thinks that the husband likes to eat the fish head and tail, so he gives the fish head and tail to his husband afterwards, eating the fish he doesn't like... Decades have passed and they are all old. One day, the husband sighed, "I really want to eat delicious fish meat!" The wife said, "I really want to eat fish head and tail."
While we moved the couple to give up their favorite things for a long time, we could not help but sigh: both of them live in their own world and have always loved each other in the way they think they are the best, but they never expected that this was not what the other party wanted. This triggers one of the three most important elements of marriage: communication.
High communication needs in marriage:
1. Fundamental cognition: Marriage is the fusion of two families and a small family composed of two people. Pursuing love and entering marriage is the expectation of adding icing on the cake to both parties' lives, peace of mind and warmth. No one expects it to be a storm and snow, and he feels haggard. Although it was a mess after marriage, the original intention of starting was to be beautiful. Only by keeping your original intention in mind can you achieve the end;
2. Equality and mutual respect: The most common problem in marriage and love is imbalance, that is, you love the other person far more than the other person loves you, and you become a cowardly and humble character in marriage. Over time, the weaker side has become increasingly inferior, and the strong side has become more powerful. We do not emphasize absolute balance, but we cannot have too big gaps. Refer to the pig head and swallow in the movie "Passing by Your World", if you love too humbly, you will be destined to lose yourself;
3. Seeking common ground while reserving differences: In the original family to entering society, there are many inconsistencies in many aspects such as root, knowledge, personality, and cognition. There will inevitably be many collisions or disputes. At this time, you need to tolerate and understand each other, and there is no need to be tit for tit. Love can tolerate most common conflicts in the world.
4. Abide by the bottom line: Love is tolerance, not indulgence. When you are in trouble or touch the bottom line, you must stick to your bottom line. For example, treat each other's parents differently, bad habits (pornography, gambling, drugs), etc. You must have a bottom line in life, and you must also have your own bottom line in marriage;
5. Express your thoughts directly: You can tell them directly if you really don’t want or don’t want. Why do people have language? It is to communicate with each other and express your thoughts to each other. Don’t keep your mouth shut, and don’t let the other party guess.
6. Put down your phone: Needless to say, this is the case. Two people have a bed, back to back, two mobile phones, no communication;
7. Stable emotions: Many people are used to trying their best to be themselves in front of outsiders, take off their guards after returning home, and vent their emotions without any scruples. He gave the best side to outsiders and the worst side to his family.
home is a warm harbor, not a cold place. I wish all friends and friends love, home and happiness.
