Author: Ai Wen (Emotional Self-media Person)
The first two articles, we analyzed from different angles, to determine whether a person can turn back. In today's article, we continue this topic, but the perspective returns to the most fundamental perspective, namely the perspective of relationship between couples or couples.
In fact, the relationship between a couple or a couple (hereinafter referred to as "intimate relationship" for ease of expression) largely determines whether the party who betrays the relationship may turn back after the betrayal occurs, and determines the final direction of the relationship.
From the perspective of intimate relationship, these two aspects can be used as important considerations.
First of all, the strength and weakness of two people in an intimate relationship. How to understand the sentence
? Simply put, it is whether there is a situation in the relationship where one party is completely dominated by one party, and one party completely suppresses the other party.
We are all talking about the balance in intimate relationships, which is what people often call "even-match". However, in reality, there are very few intimate relationships that truly form even-match, and most intimate relationships are usually a kind of existence with clear strength and weakness.
If two people want to become a whole, they must reach an agreement. Then, in the intimate relationship between strong and weak relationships, the result is self-evident, that is, the strong side will always occupy the dominance. Everything is decided by this strong person. Over time, this strong person will not realize that what he does is a strong person, but will think that he is wise and correct; while that weak person is often in a passive and submissive state. Under a relationship model like
, if the marriage does not have much problem, it can be harmonious and beautiful. However, once betrayal happens, the result will be obvious: the betrayer is often the strong party, and the strong betrayer is difficult to end the betrayal relationship. On the one hand, it is because he believes that what he does is "right", and on the other hand, it is because the consistent model makes him feel that everything is under his control, or that he can completely control everything.
, and when standing on the side of betrayal, because they have been in a passive and surrendered situation for a long time, they are often helpless when facing betrayal. They are both "no way" to the betrayer, and it is difficult for them to decide to completely end their marriage and fall into a dilemma. The corresponding
is that in the eyes of the betrayer, no matter what he is, the other party has no way to deal with him or not to leave him. Such a psychological mechanism of is often more unscrupulous under . To end a betrayal relationship, it requires "law", either external laws or self-discipline - it can be imagined that there is neither external laws nor self-discipline, so the probability of ending a betrayal relationship is slim.
In close relationships with distinct strength and weakness, the fundamental reason for this distinct strength and weakness is mainly two aspects. One is the strength of both parties, especially economic strength. For example, housewives are often weak in relationships; the other is the personality of both parties, such as some people value feelings and are indecisive in dealing with things.
is actually the emotional state of two people, especially those who betray their feelings.
After the betrayal happened, some betrayers wanted to return, but because of betrayal, the conflict between the two people occurred and their emotions were out of control. They often tried to solve the problem through fierce conflicts. The final result was that not only the relationship between the two people could not be bridged, but it became worse.
After the betrayal occurs, there is a key indicator of whether the relationship between the two people can be reconciled, which is the emotional stability of both parties. If the two people are usually more emotional people, then betrayal is equivalent to ending the relationship.
For those who are betrayed, emotional out-of-control is inevitable. Betrayal is a deep injury. It is difficult for a person to maintain his emotions when he suffers such a serious psychological trauma.
At this time, it is very important to betray the person with emotional characteristics of the betrayal of the relationship.If this person is an emotionally stable person, it is hard to say whether he can look back, then it is basically impossible for a person with an emotionally unstable person to look back. Why does
have such a conclusion?
Just imagine, if a person betrays his feelings and the person he hurts, if he expresses his emotions to him, whether it is angry or sad, he can't afford it. In this case, he will have more emotions than the person he hurts! Is
very weird? But this is true in reality. A person who betrays his feelings often appears more hysterical and more likely to lose control of his emotions than a person who has been betrayed by his feelings.
. Betrayal is a kind of "seeking out". When he cannot face and bear emotions, his usual mode will "start" again. At this time, the third party becomes his emotional placebo and stable period, so he will never look back.
