When a man abandons his original wife and married San for the sake of his third sister, the man has higher expectations for San. At the same time, after hard work, San finally got what he wanted, and she also had high expectations for this man. The two people's expectation for both parties comes from the love they believe, the centripetal force formed in the process in order to work together to overcome various difficulties, and the curiosity in both parties' hearts about the new marriage life experience they bring to themselves. But when they finally got married, what followed was not the surprises and beauty they were expecting. It’s their own sense of disappointment with each other. They will realize that everything has changed.
The love before marriage has become a reexamination and self-question of the two's immoral relationship after marriage. Examining the relationship between the two makes each other afraid that the other will be unfaithful to him one day and will betray him in the same way. Self-questioning makes each other realize that extramarital affairs and marriage are not the same thing after all. Extramarital affair seeks the release and satisfaction of each individual's dark side, while marriage is the destination of personal spiritual needs. Human nature determines that we will not find the destination of our own spiritual needs in extramarital affairs, and determines that we will not seek the release and satisfaction of the dark side of our own human nature in marriage. Therefore, when the two finally get married, they will fall into a self-contradictory. Either the contradiction is that since he has become my spouse, I can no longer obtain the release and satisfaction of the dark side of my heart in him, or I cannot obtain my self-spiritual needs for marriage in him, and my spiritual needs for marriage cannot be found in him, and I am very frightened.
realized this and realized that marriage and extramarital affairs cannot be equated or interchangeable, otherwise both parties would deny the love they thought they had thought of at the time in the contradiction between self-humanity. We can often see a phenomenon in this marriage that evolved from extramarital affairs. That is, after the two got married, they had disagreement and denial of their love at the same time. This has led to the two losing interest in each other since they got married, and it has added an inexplicable resentment. Their married life is not only not beautiful, but instead becomes attacking each other and attacking each other in a difficult manner. They suspect each other and monitor each other and always treat each other through interrogation and questioning.
Before getting married, the cohesion centripetal force formed by both parties in the process of overcoming many difficulties and obstacles became deeply doubtful about whether the other party was worth it at that time after marriage. The party who abandoned the original wife began to miss and regret for the original wife, and both parties would feel that the other party was not worthy of abandoning the original wife. We can often see a phenomenon in this marriage that evolved from extramarital affairs. That is, the party who abandons his original wife after they get married will bring his nostalgia and regret for his original wife into their lives. When he gets along with his current position, he will compare the current position with the original position's goodness, so he will think that the current position is not as good as the original position. He would take the goodness of his original partner to him as his request to his current partner to make his current partner treat him as well as his original partner. He even takes the life pattern he has already formed with and his original wife as a template to ask the current one to learn from the original wife. And these are unacceptable to his current staff. As a result, a hidden and indescribable opposition and disagreement will form between the two. There is a quarrel between the two of them.
Before getting married, the curiosity of both parties about the new marriage life experience brought to them by the other party has become complaints and accusations after marriage that the other party cannot give them enough emotional value and a beautiful enough marriage life experience. The passion before marriage makes them live in an illusion, making them fantasize about the life where each other can bring them a colorful, happy, comfortable and passionate life. But life after marriage is all boring. After all, they cannot escape the result of returning to the real marriage life. Their illusion and real life contrast first made them realize that there is no beauty to be with each other, and both sides will feel that expectations are disappointed. The party who abandoned the original wife felt that living with the current wife and living with the original wife had not been better.He even feels that it is better to live with his original wife because he is not used to the pattern of living with his current wife. He would feel that abandoning his original wife was a wrong decision. This often leads to those who abandon their original wife and third marriage for extramarital affairs and divorce quickly and turn back to find their original wife to remarry.
Overall, marriages evolved from extramarital affairs are difficult. The seemingly true result of cultivation is actually the beginning of the two people's tribulation. Most of these marriages start with passion and get along with each other very cohesively, but they seem to be unreasonable and can't figure it out. Because during the beginning and ending process, both of them did not understand the strange, complex and confusing psychological laws at work. But it is not to say that all marriages of this type are not happy. It’s just that it’s too difficult to live a happy marriage, and it’s impossible to maintain it by just being emotionally connected. This kind of marriage can last for a lifetime and seems to be happy, but it often has nothing to do with love and feelings. The exchange of interests and alliances between the two sides are the essence.
OK, I am Brother Qin Qin, that’s all for today’s content. If you have emotional confusion, you can ask me for help.
